im after some advice from people i've recently had a termination due to the fact that my partner and i feel we couldn't afford to raise the baby as a couple... were both still young and still wanting carrers in life and go that bit further! we also felt that it would be seriously unfair on the baby if we struggled financially.... some days i feel i haven't got over the termination emotionally... i dont even feel that i have even thought about it as iv'e had so much on my head and it's happened sooo quickly i havent had time to think anything of it... up till now as my body is changing..... part of me feels like i regret having the termination.... and part of me feels i have done the right thing and it was for the best.... deep down i have done the right thing as i said above i know it was the right thing to do! i just wonder have i really got over it.... am i still emotionally affected... how will i know? thank you!
When you accidentally get pregnant again, please arrange for adoption and carry the baby to term. termination = abortion = murder If you cannot say the word, then don't do it!
Lilnat, ignore him. Abortion is legal in your country and most of the people in it are in favor of it staying legal. I've known a few women who've had abortions, and they all have had difficult times dealing with it - which is understandable, of course. It's a huge decision. My good friend still feels sad about it sometimes, and it's been ten years - but as time goes by she's more and more convinced that she did the right thing. I do not know any women who have had abortions and wish they hadn't. No one makes the decision lightly. Good luck, honey. I think it will get better for you.
Abortion isnt murder, not by any means. Please don't feel bad for making the choice that you did, adoption isn't always a good choice. You will feel a little off for awhile, while your body deals with the hormones going back to normal. Troll, how about a little compassion eh? This isn't the forum to be anti abortion in at all, your gonna have your head bitten off.
I have a lot of compassion for lilnat; she was and is in a terrible situation. In the late 1950s my younger sister was faced with the same situation. She and her boyfriend were both marginally employed Cal Berkeley students and both had dreams of future successes. Getting married and having the baby would have meant dropping out of college and facing a life of middle class drudgery. I fully supported her decision. She died of post-operative complications two weeks after having her illegal abortion. If proper methods of abortion had been available in 1959 my sister would have lived! In the spring of 1988 my wife became pregnant. Her choice was to have a now legal and safe abortion so as to not interfere with her rapidly advancing career, but thankfully I prevailed and she delivered my #1 son the day before her 30th birthday …. and I was given the opportunity to be a full-time Mr. Mom. Thirteen months later she delivered my #2 son. Those babies are now flourishing at 20 and 21, responsible young men who will both make a difference in the world that we have been borrowing from them. From the perspective of who and where our two fine sons are today, if we had chosen to “terminate” Mom’s “medical condition” …. it would have been murder. Sugar coating the words makes it difficult to take an unbiased position while making the decision. Abortion and pregnancy are words that are not loaded. Libertine said it better than I can. You should read his whole post: Sex is a very serious matter, and it needs to be dealt with responsibly. Two people should not allow a pregnancy occur until they are prepared to take on the responsibility of parenting a child. Individuals should not have a sex partner until they are prepared to take on the responsibility of avoiding pregnancy. One trait of a fully functioning individual is taking responsibility for one’s actions. I would hope that every person having sex will be sufficiently responsible to consider all of the consequences of how they deal with an unwanted pregnancy. There are plenty of childless couples who are willing to pay for all pre-natal medical care to be able to adopt an unwanted baby, and easily obtained legal protections for both sides. I did not say, nor do I believe, that there is never a time that abortion is the best choice. Nor do I want lilnat’s thread to become an anti-abortion argument. Sarahrei, I have grown to have high respect for your ideas and opinions, but there are times when we don’t see eye to eye and this seems to be one of them. My head’s been bitten before …. often times justifiably …. but it’s still there.
Though you don't know that her situation wasn't one of those times that abortion was a better option. If I were to get pregnant now I would abort it in a heartbeat. I have birthcontrol in place, and if it were to fail and I get pregnant I would not carry it to term. I would murder it as you say because there is no way that I could continue working as a baker with a rapidly growing unwanted child. Just saying that it's really not fair that you judge a person on having a abortion when you don't know her full story, adoption sounds like a great option but sometimes it's not.
You will probably never get over it completely because it is a fact that it happened, but the conflicting feelings you are having now will fade with time. It is a hard situation to be in, and a learning curve- i don't know (or need to know) how it happened that you became pregnant , but it is everyone's responsibility to themselves and their partner(s) to ensure a pregnancy does not occur if it's not wanted. Good luck to you and hope you are feeling better soon xxxx
I love how many people are blaming the OP. Sometimes you can have all the right birthcontrol in all the right places and one of those little fuckers gets threw.
ermmmm... id like to thank everyone for thier views and opions.... is hard for me still.... i can't remember if i said but the reason why i'm not keeping the pregnancy was because we are both still wanting things in life and still studying it wouldn't of been fair but im sure i will not forget about it... but try to move on from and see it as a experience!
