Okay, so let me tell ya'll the story from the start. I was dating this girl, "A" for about a year, when her parents told her that they have to relocate to a different state. We were devestated, but tried to stay together. We were madly in love while we were physically together, but the feeling faded after about six months, mostly because i was always lonely, so i got grumpy, and didnt want to deal with a long distance relationship. So, of course, being a guy, my eyes traveled. I found a girl, whom i felt very close to, but not as close as my gf at the time, "A". After a bit of persuading by "B" i decided to leave "A". I have been with "B" ever since, (approximately 8 months) but i find that i am always comparing the relationship with "B" to the relationship with "A", and noticing relationship "B's" shortcomings. I have remained in contact with "A", and she still lives out of state, and we are on decent terms, and she wants me to move down with her after i graduate, as she is still in love with me. "A" has changed quite a bit, gotten mixed up with drinking quite a bit, and turned into, well, to be nice, a whore. So, to sum it up, i feel the relationship i have with "B" is inferior to the one that i had with "A". however, i cant go back with "A" because i feel she has changed so much, and it would never be the same. I'm basically having a hard time getting over the past when it was so amazing. But, i know that i will never have that again, so i try to go on and live my life with "B" as happily as i can. (im not miserable or anything with "B" but what we have just doesnt seem to be up to par with the relationship i had with "A") It's just hard trying to accept what ive got when i just recently had something much more superior. gah, fuck it. im goin gay. women suck.
Here's what I think: Women don't suck, you do - because you're not being fair to "B" by staying in that relationship while comparing her to your ex. Either you stop doing it or you leave. As for "A", you need to get over her and you won't be able to do so as long as you keep in touch.
well come on dude, you think i dont know that its not fair to b? of course its not, and that kills me even more because i DO care about her so much. and im over the fact that im not ever going to be with A again. but i cant get over the fact that i had something amazing with A. now, i can either go through life knowing that i had something amazing, that i can never have again, or i can get something better. which, if i would stop comparing the two relationships, i might find that i have something amazing right in front of me with b. but its just actually getting over the fact that my situation right now sucks thats tough for me. pointless thread i guess. i just kind of felt like venting.
Ok, I was being a bit harsh - sorry 'bout that. Anyway, feel free to vent all you like here. After reading both your posts I think you don't really need anyone's advice since you already know what to do. Hope it all works out for you. Peace, Musikero
You eyes didn't wander because your a guy. My male friends in the military have no problem staying with one chick (and don't say "they wouldn't tell you" cause yes they would, I don't know their wives it doesn't matter to me who they fuck). You just wanted to look. You wouldn't have left A if you didn't want too. Your current situation with A and B is nothing but your falut, your still young enough to be driven by pussy.
i have a very long distance relationship and its very hard so i understand the frustration. IMO stop all comunication with A it will help you with B stop focusing on the shortcomings with B else youll be miserable. and hurt ur relationship with B my two cents
It's not really a pussy thing at all. I have weak morals, if it was just pussy, i could have gotten that fix out of my system and gone on with my relationship with A. my relationship with A deteriorated because we were in different states. Our conversation after six months had just slowed to maybe a phone call once a week, when before, we were on the phone from dusk til dawn. Im aware that my situation is my fault. And im dealing with the consequences of it in the form of mental torture.
I have pretty much stopped all communication with "A", and i told her that i didnt want to talk with her because im in love with "B", and shes just complicating things. We're still on good terms, but we just dont talk anymore. Shes off doing her thing, while im trying to make things work out with "B". oh. but did i mention that "B" has no idea that i feel this way?? i kind of figured that it would crush her to know that i was torn for a period of time, and still continue to compare the two. so ill just fix it and pretend it never happened. or it will just get worse and i will end up leaving both "A" and "B" and find "C" who will rock my shit.
