Advice for Stupid People

drinking milk wont turn your piss green

 

drinking beer doesn't make you smarter

 

wearing vertical stripes doesnt make you thinner

 

don't drool on the waiter because he smells like food.

 

drink through your mouth...not your nose

 

brush your teeth atleast once a day

 

dont brush your teeth with soap

 

don't eat a whole pound of raw hamburger

 

tylenol leads to kidney failure

 

dont kick a skunk

 

don't kick a cop

 

If you are going to steal a car *Do* pick one that will blend in traffic better than a pearl white six door limo

 

dont fear the reaper

 

Tequila makes your clothes fall off

 

dont believe the strange voices in your head

 

not a good idea to go for a midnight swim in sub-zero weather....

 

Dont throw your sticky underwear on the ceiling after an all night orgy.

 

wear your seatbelt

 

close your eyes when you sleep

 

dont masturbate downstairs with the curtains open