depression

im like at suicide risk....and i dont know why. nothing really bad has happened lately everything i'v wanted has been happening. its crazy. but i feel like something is just not right. i mean i'v basically got the guy i want i have amazing friends my fam is on my case but thats been like that my whole life nothings is really different in a bad way. just i really want to jump in front of a train and say goodbye to everything and everyone i love and that scares me more than anything because i feel like iv got nothing left to live for anymore and not like iv got everything oo my life is perfect but like i feel content with life just not fully.

 

It sounds like you are having a taste if infinity

Carlos Casteneda The Active Side of Infinity


I was feeling the same way the last two days, there must be a crushing wave of it passing through.
It's our 'job' to balance the sadness with happiness. We can transform this energy with our intent Conciously choosing to attune to the loving energy in ourselves can (what feels like) miraculously give us a boost into the most delicious Bliss because we generate it ourselves by 'eating' the saddness creating an exquisite contrast.

 

Newport Smoker: Brain chemistry. Go see a psychiatrist. Really. It's bad brain chemistry, and medications can fix this. Don't let it go on like this. I know what I'm talking about - I have a stepdaughter who is bipolar on meds, and a 13-year-old daughter just starting on meds, and I'm probably borderline myself. Don't let your brain chemistry bring you down. Get some help.

 

will do thank you zengizmo.

 

Here's another suggestion. Check out www.emofree.com. This is an energy healing technique that I've used to help me with depression. I'm free of depression now and have been for quite a while. This technique has done wonders. You may also want to look into the book Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle. In it he talks about the Pain Body. Awareness of this is something else that's been very helpful. Feel free to PM me if you ever need to talk or have questions or anything.

 

quit newports and smoke hydro

 

I deal with a lot of depression too. In my case it is caused "mostly", but not entirely, by brain chemistry imbalances caused by allergies -- to many common things -- inhaled, or ingested.

New allergies can be acquired at any time to any thing. Tobacco got added to my long list of things. And, I once smoked a pack and a half a day -- not any more.

A possibility to consider.

Hope you find your answer.

 

Recommending someone take pharmaceuticals after one rambling post is really dumb and irresponsible.
Plus, your 13 year old will be forever more fucked up now. Good job.
Lets all take things that inhibit natural emotions.

 

She'll be a lot less fucked up than if she kills herself, HushBull.

Medication is only part of the therapy. It allows her to function while she's learning to deal with her issues better. If she learns really well, maybe she can ditch the meds someday.

And BluesAfire, thanks for the EFT link and the Tolle suggestion - I might look into that.

 

brain chemistry is a marketing scam to sell drugs

in reality, it's all energy. All around you. It's not JUST some chemical in your brain affecting you, perhaps some percentage. But there is much more going on than that. It's the energy through your whole body, it's the energy in the area and environment surrounding you, it's the energy of the others you associate with.

Newport_smoker, do you ever go out into the forest alone and meditate or do something? Sometimes just staying in your typical routines and habits, your actually engrossed in negative energies, but you just aren't aware of them because you've become so used to them. Take time to go outside by yourself, get away from the energies you are typically engrossed in to get a clear sense of your situation.

Sitting in your room by yourself wondering whats wrong with you won't do much.

 

(Chuckling) No.

I lived for years with a teenager whose brain chemistry was totally fucked. And I saw her finally emerge as a new and finally functional person after being confined to a state institution for almost a year and stabilized on medications.

All her siblings and her mom and I were living in the same "area and environment" as she was, and we were experiencing each others' energy just as she was. But she was clearly and obviously messed up major big time, and the rest of us were not. And what finally made the difference in her life was the medications.

I don't discount energy. But energy doesn't make somebody act the way she did.

I get a chuckle imagining you trying to help her understand and deal with her "energy environment" while she destroys your house and emotionally and physically assaults you over and over and over...

I've been there, rygoody. It was HELL, and I'm willing to bet you've never experienced anything like it. Medications are no marketing scam, they're a gift from God.

And just so you know, I tried doing a kind of energy work with her early on. It just made things worse. Medications are what brought her back from the abyss.

Oh, and also just so you know, my spirit guide Deanna is on medications for bipolar disorder. This is the woman who is in my mind 24/7, who knows me better than I know myself, who communicates with me telepathically and has answered my unspoken thoughts out loud on numerous occasions, and who has received responsibility for my spiritual growth in this lifetime. Try telling her she should just ditch the meds and work on her energy. She's laughing in my mind right now as I type this.

Again, I don't discount energy influences - but it's more complicated than you're acknowledging, and energy is not the major deciding factor - God creates our neurochemistry, just as he creates our souls and our life goals, and everything is for a reason.

 

I find myself very interested in this subject - depression and it being caused by a chemical imbalance and/or one's brain chemistry. Also, deficiences in or an overabundance of the chemical(s) put out by the thyroid gland can also cause a type of depression.

I suffered from depression on and off - more on than off, for Years.
In my particular situation I attributed it to then (as do I now) to specific elements in my life and Lacking in my life...also I had not learned the healing qualities of total acceptance. That being said...

Since the OP described a life that she would otherwise consider "happy" or at least okay, the fact that there could be a basic imbalance should Not be ignored.
This is just a Fact - and not pertaining to the "depression" part of this thread, but to the brain chemistry - schizophrenia, a SERIOUS mental illness, when diagnosed and Treated Regularly with medications - is controllable - AND (this is important) it is not known which comes first - the chemical or the disease. Whatever, the presence of this Chemical indicates an imbalance which ONLY meds can help.
In a job I once had, I witnessed MORE than one or even two people Greatly Helped by medications - and the people that have severe mental/emotional problems usually began having them in their teens and it only got more severe, if untreated.

 

Get your thyroid levels checked. It is amazing how much a malfunctioning thyroid gland can screw with you physically, and emotionally. If your levels are fine, try taking sugar and wheat flour out of your diet, as some people don't tolerate them well. There plenty of things to try, and medication should be the last thing you try. While I will agree that some people cannot function without medication, more and more people are using "mood stabilizing drugs" as a crutch.

Whatever you decide to do OP, do something. Talk to a friend, therapist, bartender.....whatever. Just know that you are not alone, and many people suffer along with you.

 

Rygoody has come closest to the mark thus far.

We do have brain chemistry. However, that brain chemistry is always a reflection of our energetic configuration, and even more fundamentally, our relationship with Spirit.

That being said, like nearly all approaches advocated by western medical ideology, medication can be beneficial during dire circumstances like the ones Zengizmo has described. But only up to a point. The objective, no matter how extreme the symptoms exhibited by the "mentally ill" individual appear to be, is always about overcoming our dependency on external conditions for the purposes of experiencing well-being. And psychiatric medication is a rather nasty variety of external dependency in terms of its detrimental impact on our energy bodies.

Just like a case involving physical debilitation, we use a crutch only until we are rehabilitated to a point where we can walk on our own again. If medication continues to be related to as a long-term solution instead of as the short-term crutch that it truly is, then it ultimately only encourages people to live lives of anesthetized pain and unrealized potential.

And I speak from experience by the way. I have been diagnosed with just about every major mental illness under the sun -- everything from bipolar disorder to depression to schizophrenia, and I've spent a month's worth of time in two different psychiatric institutions. I was even told by one psychiatrist that if I didn't stay on a particular anti-psychotic (Abilify, in this case), I would "spiral downwards endlessly" (that's a direct quote). I chose to stay medication free. That was back in the fall of '03, and since that time I've not only not degenerated, I've had some of the most rewarding and spiritually empowering experiences of my life.

Make no mistake, the psychiatric industry is primarily a dysfunctional paradigm. It is fundamentally based on our obsession with seeking happiness from a source other than our own beings, and our fear of what might happen if we turn within and face our demons. But it can help people up to a point if they understand that is only a transitional solution.

A drug can never take the place of a direct relationship with Spirit.

Travis

 

There's another thread on this subject in RT...


http://www.hipforums.com/newforums/showthread.php?t=347404&f=51

 

Some good stuff in there - lode's post was informative and well-balanced, I think.

Leaving aside the psychoses for now and speaking only of depression, I do believe there are various ways to approach it, and medication is not the final solution. But for a 13-year-old girl like my daughter, who was repeating plainly with tears in her eyes that she was thinking of suicide, and she had a plan, and she needed to be in the hospital - well, jeezus, the thing to do is rescue her from the cliff ASAP, and worry about mountain-climbing training when she's under better control, isn't it? We gave her final say - told her she could try the meds, and if she didn't like them we could try something else. And cognitive therapy is mandatory, either way.

As for OP, there are lots of good suggestions on this thread and the one bluesafire pointed to. I figured meds would be a good way to get your balance back, but you don't need to go that route. If you can deal with your depression without meds while pursuing other possibilities, then maybe you should. But if the depression is too debilitating, it might be good to get some chemical help, at least for a while.

 

The healing approach should meet the specific needs of the individual, which is the kind way to go about it. Ultimately we may exist on sunlight alone, but not too many are ready to forgo food just yet. When possible and practical we can consider other more gentle & non-invasive approaches, but only if there's a readiness for it will they make a difference. If there's no readiness then those approaches will only engender more fear. So... it's good to pay attention and find that intricate balance.

Ultimately I realize that all medicine is just magical thinking. But I still take a tylenol now and then.

 

(LOL shaking my head)

blues, if that's what you realize, you must be just about a diaphanous light. If what you say is really true, then I would like very much to see through your eyes...but uh-uh, I'm just not there yet. My spirit guide seems to be trying to get me to take my emotional sustenance purely from the spirit realm, and I'm kicking and screaming all the way.

And no, I'm not ready yet to give up my Advil, or my vodka. LOL And as you indicated, readiness is crucial.

I did lick my nasal spray and antihistamine addictions, though.

I can see well enough to realize that one of the reasons for my daughter's depression is to get me to open up to some new ideas - and I'm seeing a lot of myself in her struggle, and finding new insights from it. And maybe my insights will ultimately help my daughter also.

 

Zen, you are so right on...Love ya...

 

Well I'm not entirely "there" yet either. Some things I know and embody fully. Some things I know and embody partially. Some things I know and embody not at all. Some things I don't know at all. That's the way it is for all of us. You could say an awareness enters as a thought and then works its way deeper through the emotions into the body awareness... where we actualize it. That's just one way of describing it. I did admit to taking Tylenol on occasion. Oh... and there was that trip to the ER for a poison ivy attack. Thank God for steroids!!

why? SHOULD you take it from the spirit realm? maybe you can let that go and give yourself permission just to be as you are?

absolutely. nothing wrong with that. here's to advil & vodka :cheers2:

ewww.. licking nasal spray.