short story @1:30am

so, i lost my keys a few day ago, and my hubby works at night (bear with me, this is vital to my story) and as a result he has to lock the front door on his way out. our only way out is the back door, or a window. usually we get my cat inside before he goes to work. tonight, he wanted to stay out. no big deal, hes a big kitty he can take care of himself.
well, all of a sudden i hear cat fighting sounds, on my porch. i know its my cat, because i recognize his 'voice.' so what do i do? i try to go out the locked front door, like a moron.
i run to the back door, grab a t ball bat, and run around to the front. i see my cat, and what appears to be a gray cat under the table. my cat is making his back of the throat whiny kick your ass sound. i start hitting the ground with the bat and trying to call my cat away. i get the gray thing to slink off, but without my glasses i can't get a positive ID. my cat follows, and without slippers, i had to go back inside.
i grab slippers and a jacket, my ugly birth control glasses, and a flashlight. i go back out, and start trying to find my cat. i walk around the apartment, to the alley, keeping my eyes peeled. no sound, so i start to worry. i cut between the apartments and see a gray shape moving down the sidewalk. i growl and run after it, realizing its no ones pet, its a fox. my cat was brave enough to face down a fox, and i didn't even know thats what it was.

i like foxes well enough, but mess with my cat and if i get my hands on you i'll turn you into a pelt.
what i learned tonight: my cat is the fucking coolest cat ever
i need to learn to use a sling so i can get small game, and pelts.

 

O_O


You should probably smoke your kitty up with some dank...



...and turn that fox into a handbag

 

haha, thats crazy.

my grandmas dog fought a fox once.

 

What if your cat fucked with the fox in some way, and as a result, the pissed off fox tried to get revenge... You could be standing up for the bully =/

 

Slingshot is the way to go... Buy some marbles to go with it and you'll be able to scare off any small animal in your yard without killing them

 

shotty

 

Foxes are cool =/


My cat got in a fight with a lynx one time.

 

screw a sling shot.. get your self a .22 air rifle... you can even take out small deer with them

 

That is cool. Now what are birth control glasses?

 

my guess is either military issue glasses or just glasses with really thick rims.. but most military issued glasses are called "Birth Control" because you're most likely not to get laid while wearing them lol

 

I prefer the pistol crossbow. I have always loved those.

 

Well, those don't look so bad. But good to know.

 

until you see yourself in a pair.. sure the dont look bad just sitting there..

 

Haha! Ok.

 

they are incredibly ugly glasses. and joker is right on the definition. add the glasses to the shapeless utility uniforms and no one even wants to know what you look like underneath.

but they are the only glasses i have right now. and they are really hard to break.

 

a few weeks ago they found a coyote walking around in the circut city near my house

:leaving:

 

there is a mountain lion in boulder who attacked and killed a dog while the owner watched.

 

Watchin is right.. Who gives a shit about fido mountain lions are fuckin ridiculous

 

so sad.

if the mountain lion were attacking the owner i bet the dog would have tried to help, or at least barked or something