Married Guys, when you do enjoy bi play?

When do you have your bi time?
Do you have a lot of free time to yourself, do you take your dog for an extended walk at the park? Does your s/o know and give you the time?
Most of mine are when my friend and I meet up when he comes past on business or to take care of his property up here. We get together and have a quickie bj and go on our way at all different times.
If it weren't for our special situation, I would probably still be curious.

 

Wehn you you married guys get a chance to go suck a cock? Is your wife aware of your hyjinx?
Are you one of those sunday morning guys in the park or can you just go hang out for a while and hook up?

 

For me it is infrequent, mostly when my wife is away and I have time to connect with someone. Fear of being caught keeps me very cautious.

 

Actually a question for other married guys here. How do you connect with other guys?

 

Luckily I am his wife and we aer completely open about the things we like....we support each other and share ALL things.....

so, we simply find someone who we both like and have fun!!!!!!!!!

 

To be honest, it's really tough. I've only had one experience, but I'd like ot have more. The problem with us married guys is that most of the single guys have morals about not hooking up with us... As if that makes any more sense than the act of homosexuality, if you look at it from a religous standpoint. But I guess that because we have a sort of unformal weekly routine with our spouses and/or kids, finding time to break away to actually meet other guys is a lot tougher than it would be for a single guy.

I think that once a married guy has established a mutual and beneficial relationship with another guy, then it's an ideal situation, until either of them decide to call it off. It's getting to that point of finding that other person that's the hard part.

 

It's extremely rare and difficult for me. I have almost no gay/bi friends, and the ones I do are "back home." I did have a great experience recently, though.

I don't know how bi people are hooking up with others these days. I think Craigslist is being used more these days.

 

IMHE, most bi-married or gay guys in LTR do it when they are out of town, on business, during a congress, conference, family trip or whatever. Loads of guys are advertising for 'hotel room sex' all over the web. At times, this even sounds funny from a prospective of a gay guy who is NOT homeless.

Geography still provides the best cover up. What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas...

Topper's story is a bit archetypal, too. Smart dudes use both the geography and the comfort of a friendship with benefits to both cut the chase and protect their marriage, or similar arrangements...

KD

 

Geography certainly helps make things possible. I travel often on business and, from time to time, when I'm feeling especially horny, I connect with other bi married guys in the relative safety of my hotel room. For what it's worth, I'd say 95 percent of my connections have been with other bi married guys traveling on business, too.

I'm also a member of a private, bi-friendly swinger club here in my hometown. There are lunchtime gatherings every other week as well as weekend gatherings every Saturday, so this is another opportunity to have fun. (I actually prefer the weekday gatherings to the weekend gatherings because they're smaller, thus enabling me to get to know the other members very well and decide whether I'm comfortable playing with them.) If you've got such a club in your city, this can be another option.

Cheers,
DL

 

^ That sounds really fun and exciting. But how the heck would I even begin to search for such an organization like that? I think I'd feel more comfortable in a group like that rather than going the Craigslist route, which I have for the two of my encounters.

I came close to hooking up with a bi couple, but I chickened out. I think he said he was a bottom, but in my opinion he was probably a top in disguise. Nonetheless, I as much as I'd like to find a club, I would much rather keep my wife out of it, seeing that she doesn't know about my masculine desires. If anyone knows of any national organizations out there, please share the wealth.

 

I see in your account info that you're from Southern California. I'm in Tampa, which is somewhat smaller than SoCal, so I'm pretty sure you've got something like that in your area, just by sheer numbers of people.

Do a Google search on your city/metro area and "swingers club" and see what pops up. You may have to try a few to see which ones will (A) allow single men and (B) are acceptant of bi guys, but I'm guessing you won't have much of a search.

There are some national swing "lifestyle" organizations that compile lists of local groups ... you might find something at those sites if nothing turns up on a direct search. Good luck!

Cheers,
DL

 

:/
I don't think I could bring myself to cheat on someone i'd married, not only for the risk of being caught but when you're married the whole point is being commited to each other. Ideally my wife would know i'm bisexual (and I by ideally I mean I would almost certainly tell her before we got serious) and as far as temptations go, even straight porn would be stepping over the line for me!

When you get married you give up alot, for hetero's it means they can't go out on one-night stands or flings or sucumb to that temptation, i'd just be giving up more. Quite suprised at the numbers willing to cheat. (although I can see where you're coming from.)

 

Well, until you're actually in such a situation, it's easy to talk in platitudes.

Just sayin'.

 

I guess the million dollar question to you more experienced guys is: Were your first few experiences exactly how you thought it would be?

This only being my second time, I don't want to make any assumptions or criticisms just yet. But speaking from my own two experiences, I expected each time to be a little different. And finding a steady hook up seems to be a bit challenging.

 

For the most part, yes, I think so, but I can answer the question from a couple of angles.

Despite a healthy curiosity since around age 15, my first guy-guy action was about 15 years ago, at age 25. I was at an adult bookstore, having gone there to take care of myself while watching porn in a video booth. I had a good jerk going when I noticed the gloryhole to my left. Looked through, saw a guy with a wedding band and decided, "Why not?" I coaxed him over to the hole and, two minutes later, I had a load of married-guy cum in my mouth. Pretty much what I expected.

My first time getting off with another guy was the same circumstance. A few days after the first story, I went back to the same adult bookstore and found an accommodating mouth. Realizing I was getting sucked off by another guy, I shot my load in about eight seconds. Again, pretty much what I expected.

From a more conventional point of view, my first non-anonymous connection was a mixed bag. After deciding I was pretty much done with the bookstore scene in favor of something, well, safer, I decided to connect online with other horny married guys like me. My requirements were simple: Be married and able to host. I found one guy nearby. I went to his house -- he lived about 2 miles away, so we were practically neighbors -- and we had a lot of fun. I expected that being in a private setting, I'd be able to relax, and I was. What I didn't expect was that the private setting seemed to make it less about "sex" and more about a "date" ... and that's not what I was after. I was simply looking for a (possibly regular) fuck buddy. The other guy was looking for a relationship. He was able to host, all right, but it turned out he was separated from his wife and looking to explore a new side of his life. So that ended.

As long as both parties agree upon what they're after, I think your encounters will be comfortable. That's assuming, of course, you're comfortable with your own sexual interests. The sex act itself is simple; the mental preparation can be tricky. In each case, I was ready for it.

By the way, I've found a happy medium with the swingers club I mentioned earlier. It's all about sex, but I've made a couple of no-strings-attached friends along the way ... I can always count on them for an orgasm or two at the parties.

Cheers,
DL

 

I guess you and I are one in the same, in terms of just wanting a "no-strings" situation with a married guy as a regular partner. There are just too many scared married (even single) guys in my area that are unwilling to follow up with hooking up when it all comes down to it.

 

I can relate to the no strings situation. I have had some success through intertnet ads and gay chat rooms for M2M hook ups. I have also meet some guys at the gym who are on the down low like me. Turn your Gaydar on and you will be suprised how may guys are open to some fun....

 

My best friend and I used to hook up all the time, before he moved away. It's been a couple of years now since we've had the chance to get together. My wife never knew what was taking place when my friend and I would go out. He is getting ready to move back to the area in about a month, and I can't wait!!!!!!! I never could bring myself to find another suck buddy. I'm way too cautious or worried about being caught by my daughter, now that my wife has passed away. He will be staying with us for a while when he moves back, until he can find a place of his own.

 

When I was living on my own, I found it very easy to invite my two fuckbuddies over to my place (not at the same time, although I wish)! Now that I live with my significant other, I find it much more difficult to slip away and play but I'm hoping that I may find the time to get my throat reamed here before to long. I'm needing it.

 

I don't think their morals are religious... It's more like relationship ethics. Gay men are different to bi (I think) in that they are like women. They want all or nothing. They are one way and don't expect to have to share. Being bi means you'll always be sharing...

As to the organisation in your town... you lucky bastard!