She's got depression and shit, and perhaps bipolar disorder or something, and I feel like I can't handle her craziness. But she's only 17, and she says she'll get better in time. Also, I don't want to break up with her for these things that are out of her control, and she'll be pretty lost without me, and maybe even kill herself. I'm in a bit of a predicament. I do love her, but she is a fucking handful. Like, she calls me up in the middle of the night, and demands me to come over and comfort her and stuff, saying that's the only way she can possibly feel better. I've done it a few times but I really don't like doing it, and I just don't feel like it's something I have to do.
Your going to be trapped forever if you let her pull this shit with you. The "I'll kill myself if you leave me" is just another way of trapping you. Dump her, if she really has that many mental issues she wont get better, ever. She will have to be on medication, seek counsiling.
I say screw all stupid overly dramatic relationships.. Its not worth anybodies time, She might get better in time, try 10-15 years.. Just say fuck and move on, maybe if it's not too dramatic yall can still fuck after.. lol I'm not kidding either, this is how I honestly feel about relationships
Hmm. When I ask people what I should do, most people say I should dump her. I don't know if that's just because of how I phrase these things, or if it's the truth. I just can't be bothered breaking up with her. I don't want to do that. Too much drama and tears.
Oh the thrill of drama... Not worth it at all no matter how much it means to you. There are a million other people out there with less problems to add to your own. Everyone has issues. Someone who can take care of their own issues is a good person to find.
omg, don't listen to her. Back in the day, when a girl knew her boyfriend could do better than her, she would tell him she's pregnant to try and keep her from dumping him (never did it myself). So now they've moved onto diagnosing themselves with psychiatric issues? Here's what you do..... IIIFFFF she's full of shit, she'll be mortified, but it will be no sweat off your ass ... When you break up with her (which you SERIOUSLY need to do) You call the police, and let them know what's happening, and you're afraid that she will try to kill herself and that you fear for her life. Sooo, when the cops show up at her house, and her PARENTS don't even know about her psychological issues she apparently has, she's going to want to curl up and die .. FOR REAL. not pretend like I bet she's doing NOW. Teenage girls are manipulative little suckers. If you're a nice, sweet guy, she's going to prey on it (hence what she's doing to you). If I'm WRONG, and she really is a clinical case, I apologize, and forget that I said ANYTHING. But, if she's only 17 and she has to call you every night and TELL you to come over, she's pushing to see how far she'll get before you crack. she is SOO owning you, its not even funny. She probably laughs about it with her friends how whipped she's got you or something. LOOOOOSE the crazy girlfriend amigo. NOT worth it. she may PRETEND to be a nut, but if you keep putting up with it, you're going to become one FOR REAL.
shit.. that was intense. i'm bipolar. and me and my boyfriend of two years broke up about a month ago. and it was the best decision on both of our halves. My ex-boyfriend suffered from depression and me with my mood swings. We both loved each other a lot, but now that were apart we have much needed time to work on ourselves.. it sounds like your girlfriend needs to get a hold of herself. you cant depend on others to make you happy.. its just plain and simple. hope i helped
Speaking from experience, don't just dump her, cos if she is she really IS telling the truth about everything, I'm pretty sure it'd hang over you forever. But there's nothing wrong with setting guidelines. Tell her you love her and you don't want to leave her, but you can't live your life like that. So you're not gonna come and visit her in the middle of the night, but you will stay and talk to her on the phone or whatever. I'd say be there for her, she sounds like she needs someone and if you love her and she loves you then you're probably the right guy, but let her know theres a line and you're gonna be firm.
Reading this again, it kinda bothers me. Being a teenage girl myself with whatever (irrelevent), you can't group teenage girls into 'manipulative little suckers' who prey on nice guys. Not making any presumptions BUT I think if this guy really believes that his girlfriend is making it all up then he'd have left her by now, so he obviously has some belief that shes not full of shit. And I really don't suspect many girls would lie to their guy about this and then laugh about it with their friends after, I don't think thats very realistic to be honest. I'm sure you've had your experiences and I've had mine, but I'm sorry I really strongly disagree with what you say.
don't do anything drastic right now! first, lets start with the medical end. at 17 the human body is still going through extream biochemical changes. she needs to get a complete blood profile done and consult with an endocrinologist (gland doctor.) it is quite probable that her body chemistry is out of wack big time. she might also need to see a neurologist (brain doctor), to check out if her biochmistry and neurophysiology is out if wack also. if those both turn up negative, then the next step is the psycholgical. the both of you will need to see a psychologist for couple counselling. give the psychologist time to see the dynamics of your relationship. this will uselly take between 5 to 10 sessions. it might also take longer too, depending on the complexity of the dynamics of your relationship. third point, if she won't take action on any of these steps i have listed... DUMP HER ASS RIGHT NOW! if she blames and scapegoats you, or says your the problem and nothing is wrong with her... DON'T WALK BUT RUN AWAY FROM HER RIGHT NOW! if she is not motivated to help herself, then she will drag you down with her. put your own welfare first in this matter. you have only one life to live; don't let anyone rob you of your one and only life!
I once dated a rape victim. I'm sorry, but there is a limit to how much emotional crap I can put up with. That was when I started smoking a pack of Colts every day. If she's really that crazy, cut it off, seriously, I know that sounds " evil " but trust me, you'll be better off.
The most imortant and probably most difficult thing you can do is treat her with compassion. While the relationship may need to end for your own well-being, please remember that she is going through a hard time and is reaching out for something. She is suffering and needs kindness and understanding now more than ever. If you let her go, do so gently and communicate how you feel the best you can, keeping in mind that she is hurting. This will be a decision that will strengthen your morale and make it easier for both of you in the long run. Best of luck.
Does she come from a bad home? I have depression, but since I moved in with my boyfriend and away from my alcoholic father and all the negative energy of that house, I've gotten a lot better. I used to beg my boyfriend to come over and console me, because he was the only person in the world who could make me feel better. Apparently, you mean just as much to this girl, so I wouldn't just abandon her if I were you. Plus at her young age, a lot of it is probably hormonal, but that is hard to control.
i think if she's telling you in time she'll get better, i'm pretty sure it wont. and if it does, it'll be a lot of time. she's going rely on you and get super attached, like you're a parent. she may use you as a crutch and it'll make you eventually go crazy. i think you need to talk to her about it straight up and be like i want to be with you but as much as i try it doesn't seem like it's enough and you're depression is taking you down and tell her how you feel completely
you don't necessarily need to dump her directly if you use her bipolar disorder to your advantage. You have to get yourself into a position where she will want to dump you. I was in the same situation, my ex would often threaten suicide if I left her and I felt so trapped that I thought my only way out was to do it first. But I started volunteering for a lot more hours at work, was around her less for "reasons that were out of my control" and that eventually flared into a situation where she cheated and then left. That was a little upsetting at the time, but in the long run I got the better end of the deal and she is now somebody elses problem.
