Wierdest reasons for not coming into work.

i have to go and tend to my poorly grandmother

 

I have to wash my car

 

i'm doing a live news report

 

I have to wash my hair

 

my cheese is mouldy

 

i drank bleech instead of coffee this morning :S

 

i woke up and drank a 12 pack

 

dead...:-0

 

i've gone schizophrenic since last night.

 

cause i didnt have a job

 

My friend used "my lungs collapsed" three times. Then had two weeks of no call, no shows. Then was fired, reapplied, failed a drug test and still got his job back.

 

circumcision is infected

 

i got locked in a closet

 

can't get out of bed

 

i got a stick of chalk wedged up my left nostril

 

I have to blow something..........

 

I'm overheating

 

i slept like crap

 

i've been made redundant

 

rasta man held up bus to smoke a joint.. I joined him.