first sexual experience and im confused!

Ok, im 16 and I'm a virgin. I'm a tad bit over weight, but i have been going to the gym and lost 12 pounds over the coarse of 5 weeks. I have hyperhydrosis (sweaty hands) meaning i get extremely anxious when they start to sweat, like i get randomly get hot and sweat more because I'm anxious about my hands. Lately i've been learning how to accept who i am and the stuff about my self. I have never had a g/f in my life, but my my brother has had about 20 and slept with over 70 different girls lol. Not trying to sound cocky, but I'm beyond intelligent; 1/3 of the way through someones statement (i have to have known them for some time) i can predict what they might say by analyzing them. That was just an example showing that I can analyze, rethink, incorporate information, etc.
Now I stated the information above to help people give a legit response.

I have been talking to this girl that used to go to my old school. She is a year younger then me, but mentally im on a different level. So she annoys me at times. She is not a virgin and is extremely immature. She messaged me first telling me how she broke up with her b/f and is looking for a new one. I let her do most of the talking, because I have poor social skills because i smothered my self with video games (lately i stopped the games and worked on my social life so it is pretty decent at the moment).
Well we talked and i invited her to a party (I let her know their will be drinking and smoke, etc) and she said she would come. She told me she cant stand smoke and wont even kiss a guy who smoked; also told me i should stop because smoking harms ur lungs/brain and drinking harms ur kidney/brain. We all know they don't do a noticeable damage to the brain and drinking mainly harms ur liver; on top of that smoking bud doesn't completely harm ur lungs to the extent she made it seem when used in moderation.
i need to stop going into details because i will never finish this.

Well, she told me if i give her at least one drink, i might get lucky. I told her i was going to take a shower knowing she will say something along the line she did. She told me she wishes she had a pic so i was like we could exchange pics. So i went to take a pic , but couldn't get hard because i was on amphetamine based medication. So i prolonged it to the next day and sent it. She was like nice, etc. but never sent one back. I never mention that she didnt or asked for it.
I indirectly let her know i was liking her. Shes weird though, like she ask for my friends number who will be driving us, but i refused and played it off. My friend would end up thinking she is annoying and not even want to chill.
She was told me exact words, "imma get raped".
i was like WTF?? and brought it to the fact i would protect her if anything were to happen. I dont think she ever been to a real party in her life and doesn't know the environment. Seriously, it is a high school party and something like that is absurd in my community. Some kid risking the rest of his life to force a decent looking chick into sex (decent is pushing it). I never had a g/f so i need to start off small and expand when i get experience. I know im being kind of mean in the post, but i want to be 100% truthful to receive an optimum response. The "rape" situation seems possible from reading this, but if u saw the environment of this party you would see how slim the chances are.
At first i wasn't the slightest bit attractive but slowly i'm kinda starting to like her; except she despises me smoking bud.
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IGNORE ALL THE STUFF ABOVE THE LINE IF IT IS TO MUCH.
im on my ADHD medication right now, so i enjoy talking/typing.

I want this girl to be my first girl that i have sex with. She gives off the impression that she is horny. idk if the rape thing was a joke or if shes making it seem like a joke but really feels that way. She doesn't know anyone at the party except for me. She will end up knowing the people who drive us there, because we will be in the car talking for some time. Meaning she will be next to me the majority of the party. If he do end up doing it, it will most likely be outside. So how do i get her in the mood to have sex or show that shes in the mood.

This is what i have planed so far, we get to the party and begin the drinking, because we have to go home in 4 hours. Talk to her for sometime and some how move away from the people. We will make out and i will put my hand behind her head and massage it, etc. Move my hand to her inner leg and rub it a bit. After a while i will gently rub her breast and if she allows it then i will move on to rubbing her vagina trough her clothes and move from there.
is that ok?what would you do or want to be done?
im nervous....

we haven't hung out beyond the school walls yet.....

let me here some feed back.
The beginning information may come off as me being an asshole, but i just worded it funny and mentioned all the negatives lol.
The main reason i havnt had a g/f is because im to nice to girls......i become their best friend instead of a b/f. I havn't did anything with a girl because im insecure about my sweaty hands and my penis size ( 5" i think). It looks small when I look at it, but in the mirror it looks big. idk....

i researched how to finger and eat a girl out, so i should be fine on that part. I just don't know how to get her into that mood or bring it up....etc(what to do/say).
what positions....

if it is out side ill be wearing a sweater so ill let her sit on it.

 

Well, you're definitely over-thinking it. Just go with the flow.
From the way you described her she sounds awful. Are you sure you want her?

 

Not to be a dick or anything but you sound like a creep-ass.

Just flow with the situation, you're trying to calculate everything like a total weird-o. It's like psycho shit...

If you try to do things so methodically it will probably weird the girl out too. And don't be that over-protective asshole kind of guy. Joke around with her. If she says "I'm gonna get raped" laugh and mess with her - say "Yeah, pretty much." I really can't give advice because you are who you are - but you gotta loosen up. You are totally wound around gettin cuddy and you haven't even kissed the girl

 

yeh chillax mate, your trying to plan everything down to a t.

stop trying to figure out what and how to act with her and just let yourself go.


if your just in the mood to get laid it would prob be best to kind of hint to her that that's what your up for. If you get on well in the party and are flirting etc then ask if she wants to go for a walk for fresh air or something, give her a wink or a nice smile. Just show some initiative and the rest will follow.

gd luck mate, let us know how you get on!

 

This is getting to be a bit of a standard response from me now.
You need to be happy with yourself, first and foremost. If you are happy, it shines through, and it will attract people. Don't worry about genetic stuff like your sweaty palms or small penis, you got what you got and you gotta make the best of it.

As for this girl in particular - why do you want her? Do you just want to get the sex thing over with? Do you want a girlfriend? If you just want to get laid, be honest about that as well. (But don't be blunt, or it won't happen.)

Don't plan this kind of thing. Don't worry about what to say or what to do. Be who you are, be honest with yourself, and say and do what feels right in the moment. You might feel like you're never going to get there, but you will, and soon enough you'll wonder what you ever worried about to begin with.

 

i plan stuff out because when the time comes my brain freezes and shuts down; no new thoughts coming in and non going out. I just sit quietly lol.
I'm not used to people looking at me this way lol.
Hmmm i need to stop over analyzing and looking for an optimum solution; I need to just act, which is how im going to approach this.

I don't really know what I want... when the time comes ill find out and act..hopefully
ill let u know how it goes

 

Your brain freezing is a good thing. Stop the clutter, and you'll be amazed at what will pop in. Best of luck.

 

No offense but I think you actually achieved dick status there.

 

Before you go for the gold I'd suggest bein nice to the girl ie paying attention to what she has to say, taking an interest in who she is, maybe even showing a little affection, doing little favors for her and not be in such a rush to get it on. You've got plenty of time and there's lots of fun to be had between point A and point B so like everybody says, chill out and pick a few flowers along the way. Anyway good luck and let us know how it goes.

 

i think your first time should mean a little more than what you have with this young lady.... find some value in the friendship before you make it a sexual thing, and if you dont find value in the friendship, then save the sex for someone you do. In the long run you will be glad you did. Bad sex is not what you want for your first time. You are sixteen.. lots of years ahead of you to make this happen.

Good luck with re-inventing yourself.. but remember, work on the inside as well as the outside, be someone that the girl will enjoy knowing and proud to be with.

good luck
james

 

^^ Nice to hear a guy say it's worth waiting for. I agree, first sex should never have to be bad sex and it just takes a little patience sometimes to get the good stuff.

 

I couldn't even read past that....what a crock of shit...

guess what? we can ALL predict what people MIGHT say by analyzing them....its called being a human being....


and guess what else? I must be extremely gifted cause I don't even have to somewhat know the person to be able to predict what they might say

 

^lmfao:cheers2:

 

LULZ.

Also, adderall dick for teh major lose.

I hope to god yr a troll, 'cause I'm lulzing mah nutz off.

 

You actually sound alot like a guy I know... You have to understand that just because YO think you are amazing at analyzing people and think you're a fucking ubergenius does not make that true.

You seem to have a complex whereby you think you're better than everyone. It doesn't come off as cockiness, you just have this air about you that probably makes people think you're a creep. Stop thinking about things so much man, nobody wants to be with someone who is constantly over analyzing them.

Do you ever go a while without taking your ADHD medication? How long have you been on it? It's quite possible that you've never really known who you truly are because you've constantly been medicated and made to think in a different way.

 

I find that most of the time people think they are geniuses or think they are the most sane person in the world, it is often not correct.

People perceive things different ways buddy. You find yourself extremely intelligent, someone could be like "Whoa this guy is a dumb douche". It's all perspective my friend. Everyone sees things differently on this earth.

I often find myself analyzing situations and people, I go into nearly every situation with it fully thought out in my head with numerous possibilities that could happen..

Yet, could be my downfall in some ways because you can't think like that. I digress..

Just be yourself man if you are funny crack jokes make her laugh you know.

To be honest though if I was you I wouldn't get with her man, I regret the first girl I was with. It was bad ass sex that lasted four hours(didn't even get off! she did in like 5 minutes though and she wasn't a virgin) somehow on my first time but just the girl I fell in love with her and she was not who I thought she was.
Why are you mentioning the size of your penis guy? What does that matter I mean I don't have a tiny one to be honest I usually say I do but I'm a little over 8' but it still doesn't matter man. I have gotten girls off with just my hands ! Just my fingers man...

Just be yourself, if I was you I wouldn't even get with her though.

 

8 feet?!?!

 

....

Sure. lol

 

just take it easy brother..thats all i can tell you man...but youre lost dude..

 

I don;t think she is the right girl for you. The way I see it is you could be a push over and if your relationship becomes anything more then just sex well she'll have control over everything you do. I should know I let myself give up everything I loved for a person who I thought I loved. Then it all went to shit. So my advise is see how it goes but if she pushes the whole no smoking drinking video game thing that you ovbiously enjoy then don't go any further!