Ha ha.... I don't know what motivated me to do this. I was feeling creative, so I decided to compose a letter to my breasts. What would you write if you could communicate with your breasts? Anyways here it is... Dear Breasts, I honestly don’t know how to begin. I mean, you had been noticeably absent for so long that I was thinking you had forgotten about me. I sometimes wonder why you waited so long to come into my life. Perhaps you wanted me to enjoy my childhood for as long as possible? As the years rolled by I don’t think you realize how envious I was as I saw you get with the other girls. And shacking up with my little sister was downright cruel. At address 34C, no less! I am glad that you eventually came to your senses though and realized the importance of separating our mutual friends Nipples and Ribs, who had been cozying up with one another for much too long. I was pretty comfortable with this living arrangement for the first 12 years, but then seeing those two together started becoming more and more awkward, and classmates were not shy about reminding me of this. Ending that 16-year relationship was for the best. (By the way, could you remind Nipples that it is impolite to point? I can give a free pass during the winter time, but those hot summer days? That just makes no sense. Thanks.) So here we are, Breasts. Together at last. No offense intended, but now that you are in my life… I am not as happy as I thought I would be. I didn’t expect you to be so flamboyant. You have a habit of getting in the way, especially in sports. Exercising isn’t nearly as comfortable as it used to be. Guys have conversations with you more than me. And I am all for individuality and all, but I thought you two were supposed to be twins! I guess you are fraternal. Anyways, I am willing to overlook these things because you look damn good in a swimsuit. I guess what I am trying to say is I can learn to love you and I am willing to work on our relationship. Sincerely, Val
It already was published, a few weeks ago: http://community.livejournal.com/vaginapagina/2009/03/09/ But maybe FunnyValentine and Lynsey are the same person? On the Internet, you never know.