How do you know you were born gay if you don't remember being born?

A couple questions for you:


1.Around what age did you start to have any idea what sex was?

2.Whats the earliest thing you remember, not just about gay, whats the earliest memory of anything that you can recall?

3.How much of your life from 0-5 years can you remember?

4.Roughly what percentage of the male population do you think is a)gay b)bi c)straight

5. The Gay gene, do you think that has anything to do with sex or sexuality?

6. Nature/Nuture, give us a % as to which is the contributor, 10/90, 50/50, 90/10 etc

 

Orientations are developed....Not placed on you as a baby.

Besides, if you were born gay, you'd have no idea due to the fact that babies aren't exactly going out looking for gf/bf's every day....

 

A couple questions for you:


1.Around what age did you start to have any idea what sex was? i was about 5 or 6 when i found out what sex was, unfortunately.

2.Whats the earliest thing you remember, not just about gay, whats the earliest memory of anything that you can recall? when my sister was born, i was 3.

3.How much of your life from 0-5 years can you remember? i can actually remember a lot of things from this age bracket. not its not like a huge amount of things, but i'd have to say a significant amount compared to what i'm 'supposed' to be able to remember.

4.Roughly what percentage of the male population do you think is a)gay b)bi c)straight i think everybody is a little, bisexual, whether they can admit/come to terms with it or not.

5. The Gay gene, do you think that has anything to do with sex or sexuality? i've never heard anything about genes making you gay, but i've read some research that has taken into consideration the size of a certain lobe of your brain that is (should be) different between men and women.

6. Nature/Nurture, give us a % as to which is the contributor, 10/90, 50/50, 90/10 etc I'm going to have to say 100% nature. I was raised in a catholic household and was taught being anything besides heterosexual was wrong. my dad was also raised this way and his brother is gay.

 

1. I found out around 4-5 what sex was. Was keen to identify just why boys and girls were so different, was assured of this by a nice fellow on my school yard one lunch time. He was playing 'look up the girls skirt'. I remember that image vividly.

2.Oddly, I swear I recall not even being born. I know it sounds stupid, but ever since I have remembered anything I have remembered a certain glow and sense of being. Otherwise, probably around my town center around two years old. Was in a pram, looking at the sky.

3. Loads. Half the friends I still have I met at around 3-4. So it was an important, and hardly forgetful time. We constantly reminisce about the times we whacked each other with bricks and ate crayons. Plus my grandmother died, and she was really influential to me, will never forget around that time.

4. Everyone is somewhat Gay or Bisexual. I mean, any strait man knows in his heart of hearts that Johnny Depp is better looking than Jack Black, this is itself means they can identify a degree of attraction in the same sex. Maybe they do not want to have sex with them, but theirs that distinction. I feel more and more people are coming out now these days, but it doesn't mean there's an increase in homosexuals- just a newly found liberation in society.

4. Genes probably have something to do with it. They decide your hair and eye colour, height, they determine the sexual organ you are born with. Something tells your body how it must be used, I suppose. Why not Genes? However, Social implication will have somewhat of an impact as well I suppose.

5. Sort of already answered the question. I would say mostly nature. Like the above poster, I was taught being gay was wrong, but I cannot help how I feel about men. But I would argue perhaps 90/10. Nurture can maybe effect just how 'gay' a person may appear. If they were brought up with their sister and her dolly's, then they may end up a tad more effeminate.

 

1. no clue
2. probably my next door neighbor who moved away
3. ABSOLUTELY nothing
4. probably ten percent are gay. like others have said everybody is at least a LITTLE bit gay because they can say which guy looks more attractive.
5. possibly though I haven't done enough research to know if it even exists or that genes are what make you gay.
6. 10/90 partly nature ut I think it's mostly nurture. if you're raised to be gay you're probably GOING to be gay. nature though affects a bit whether or not you'll go along with that.

 

And who raises their children to be gay? Almost no-one. Gay people wouldnt exist if that was the case...

Most parents would not be happy about their children being gay, even a lot of the ones who accept it would rather their child was straight. And thats not even bringing into account the people disowned by their parents/family for being gay.

I bet if you asked all the gay people on this forum did their parents raise them to be gay, you'd be lucky if even one answered yes to that question.

 

Hah, Invisible Soul beat me to it. Was going to say, who the hell itends on bringing up their children to be gay?

Well, i'm sure some people may, but not to account for every gay person in the world

 

Well, I'm going to generalize again, but I think with most people, before they have kids tend to believe the role of the parents is more influencial. This is beacuse when we are younger we prefer to project all our issues onto and blame the parents rather than deal with our own faults.

From what I've seen most parents, once their kids get to preteens have thrown up their hands and realized they never had a lot of influence in the first place. Its important parents provide a stable environment, Parents may have more life experience, they may be smarter in some respects, but one thing is for sure the brain of that little kid is learning at 4, 5 times faster than any adult.

Mum thinks its a good idea to set aside a couple hours a week to teach her little 5 year old about maths so he has an advantage over classmates and might grow up to be a maths genius. That little dude works out way too fast that if he gets frustrated with that work and acts out, he gets a cuddle from mum, extra attention, or even a tasty ice cream to settle him down.

If you are a straight teenage guy, focused on the chics, and your Dad isnt much of a ladies man, mum was his first girlfriend, then you aint going to listen to him when it comes to pulling chics, instead you are going to hang on every word of the quarterback in high school that is pulling all the chics, not only that you are going to use your dad as a gauge of what NOT to do, or how NOT to act when it comes to the ladies.

In my opinion, the influence of peers and siblings is far more important to everyone than the parents could ever be.

Kids raised by gay parents probably more likely they are going to come out extra straight. Girl raised by two gay guys is going to crave the attention of guys that arent so sensitive. Dude raised by lesbian mothers is going to have double the experience learning to get the attention of females

 

You're right, you are generalising again.

There's too many differences between similar people's upbringings, for that to have any major part in anything. It MAY just be possible, that maybe different levels of gay and straight occur because of childhood, but even that is a big if. And even if it is true, gay people probably are pre-programmed to be gay, even if the "level" of that gayness is affected by childhood. The main problem with your generlising, is the problem faced by all nurture arguements. There is virtually no evidence to support claims like that. While there's been no evidence to say its all nature either,
there is definitely more weight behind those claims than the nurture ones.

The big problem with the nurture arguement, is unless all very similar people had very similar childhoods, the whole arguement falls flat on it's face. Like some people use being sexually abused as a child as a reason for someone turning out gay. Yes sure, some gay people may have been sexually abused as children, but then again, so have lots of straight people. The problem I think, is people trying to look for things to "blame" homosexuality on.

When the truth is, nothing's to blame for it. Even if nurture does have anything to do with it, it's only a very small part in it. Most nurture arguements can be picked apart in a matter of seconds by someone with an ounce of intelligence. And the reason for that is, they have no basis in fact. Or at least facts that can't in any way be substantially proven. Unless ALL butch lesbians were brought up the exactly same way, for example, then childhood cannot be used as a conclusive factor in how those women turned out to be that way. Same for any of these "sub-categories" of gay. With no scientific evidence to back up the nurture theory, it then all comes down to circumstancial evidence. And even that is just about non-existent, or very flimsy at best.

 

Although you make half a decent point, I personally don't see how you can claim parents will not influence there children. You say the child will learn 4-5 times faster, and from what I am aware they will probably be learning most of what they see around them- which is at home. Plus, I found as a kid, I was offered more of a chance to gain my mothers attention or ice cream based on taking interest in my work, and not throwing it on the fire.

My father for the record, was terrible with women, and still is with my mum bless him. Either way I cannot see why you arguably believe your schools sport star would much of a difference in the long run. You do try to' copy the 'cool' kids when younger, but that's a passing phase- much like what the idea of cool was to begin with.

I have two brothers raised identically to me, and we are all amazingly close. The big difference is I am gay. Nurture didn't make much of a difference, I feel.

 

IS and LYS, again agree with you both, as I said, I was generalizing and too complicated to go through in a post with a few paragraphs.

But if it is all nature, then it would follow that, with the exception of the genes passed on, that the role of the parents counts for zip

 

There are many fields of science strung together using a heuristic (top down) approach without all the facts worked out. The theory of evolution comes to mind, just about the entire field of psychology, many drugs are tested on mice then humans, then mass produced and marketed without really knowing how they work.

Dangerous hanging on one ultimately wrong theory just cos it might be popular, yes, Freud taught us that.

But also dangerous dismissing any lateral thinking because one thinks its meaningless if it hasnt been scientifically proven

 

I think in the case of sexuality, that's exactly what a parent's role counts for. Parents almost exclusively would wish their kids to turn out straight. Even those parents who accept their kid's being gay, would still prefer it if they were straight. Parents might think they have a strong influence where sexuality is concerned, but they're deluding themselves. The only thing a parent can really do, is to express their own feelings about sexuality. Which if they happen to be very negative towards homosexuality, that really has no bearing on the sexuality of the child. The only thing it probably will do, is make their child afraid of being themselves, and if they are gay, probably will not tell their parents. Same with siblings, or peers. If you know they are very anti gay, its not going to prevent you from being gay, if that is what you are. It's merely going to make you supress it, thats all.

I'm dismissing it, because to me, every nurture arguement I hear creates more questions than answers, and they seem to have very little basis in logic at all. Mostly, very simple arguements such as, "If you had a lot of exposure to females at an early age, you'll turn out like...". Too many people with very similar upbringings turning out very differently leads me to think that nurture has very little, if anything to do with sexuality. Im not dismissing it entirely, but nurture arguements are very easy to pull apart. Until I hear a very strong nurture arguement, that actually makes sense, that I cant easily pick a million holes in, then maybe I'll think there's something in it

 

1. grade 5?

2. grade 3-4? can barely remember

3. nothing?

4. 30/20/50 shrug

5. is there such a thing? noone will ever know

6. 50/50? no idea

interesting...so yeah, during highschool when i was really struggling with coming to face that i was gay i blamed my 3 sisters in my mind a lot and me not having a good relationship with my dad and me not having any friends.