hi. ok. i'm not even in college yet and i fucking HATE it. college can die. i'm so sick of busting my ass only to get a rejection letter from my dream school of 6 years. yes its true i've been absolutely dreaming to someday attend the Boston Conservatory for 6 years. i work and bust my fucking hump every single day. i've given up SOO many activities and parties and basically everything to work on my craft [singing, dancing, acting] i'm not untalented i can tell you that and be sure. i've been doing all this stuff since i was 4 and i've intensely trained my whole life. i think its absolutely ridiculous that because i'm a white, brunette girl with brown eyes my chances are slimmer than if i were a black girl or a hispanic girl or whatever. i know colleges have quotas to fill but its not fair when someone has so much passion and actually had a fantastic audition and they still dont get picked. it just boggles my mind that i live in AMERICA and apparently race and religion here still matters everywhere. why cant people in this country open there minds and accept everyone as one culture.. AMERICAN DUH! we're all AMERICANS. sooo am i more or less of an american becasue im white rather than black? the whole rule of races is so fucked up.. we're in america so lets mesh together FOR ONCE and be one country not a million: thank you america and you're corrupt rules THATS ACTUALLY THE REASON WE DONT ACT AS A WHOLE granted i've gotten into some good schools and all but this really hurts bad. i like to think that i also have great karma. i NEVER talk shit about people even if they've done so to me. I keep my ill thoughts to myself and try to think few ill thoughts to begin with. isnt karma supposed to "reward" me or something eventually.. how come karma will get you back for something but never give you something. i've spent my whole 18 years of existence being a good person and not hurting people and being karma's pathetic little door mat. fuuuuuuuuuck thaaaaaaat! i just really needed to vent b/c i've been crying all day long this is like a bag of bricks to the face. i told my mom [JOKINGLY] that if i didnt make boston then i'd kill myself lol its just hard when this has been my life's dream and now its shattered. oh and in their letter it says "we would like you to know that this isn't to be taken personally...don't give up...best of luck in your future." yeah. ok. fuck that too. i wanna write them back saying FUCK YOU BOSTON i dont need your sympathy especially when youre the ones who make me feel like shit. jfhg.gfjhsdjhfs.ughhhhhhh! bye.:cuss::banghead::sad:
There IS such a thing as CLASS, Zoomie. Although it's a hard concept for a lot of Americans to understand.
looking back on what i wrote since i've had a lot of time to cool down an consider my other acceptances... this was a really angry post lol hmm well zoomie.. i just dont understand why we live in one country but we act like we live in seperate ones.. i understand every race has a past and honestly most of them had ugly points that were hurtful and rocky and whatever but its over and thats why its called the past so i wish that we could all be americans as one instead of americans with exeptions for each group of people. its just annoying =\ and mamak.. college loans are a joke. a complete joke. i'm the middle child of 5 kids and my dad had to lay off his employees and sell his business almost 2 years ago thanks to this brilliant declining economy. i dont think you could ever win when it comes to paying tuition.
So you're just like...um so very...like pissed because daddy's girl didn't get into the school she wanted to go to? That's so like....omg. lol. ----- I mean come the fuck on man, as long as you get into a school you'll be alright. Fucking jesus christ, just be happy with what you have and just learn that daddys girl won't have everything she desires.
wow... are you kidding me. for your information i'm not a "daddy's girl".. do you want to know what i am? i'm the middle child of 5 kids who works almost 7 days a week and my dad is never even home because he works more hours than normal to try to support us now that there's no work out there and there are 7 people in this house plus 3 animals and a grandmmother we're supporting. i help my mother run errands and drive my little siblings around everywhere because shes always busy. i'm not a fucking saint but i do my part around this place. i cant even go visit my sister in florida with my family next week because i have to work so i dont lose my fucking job like my father did. and guess what. it's not about getting into ANY school it was about getting into a school i worked specifically hard for for about 5 or 6 years. a school that i had obsessed over since before i even went to high school. i gave up an entire social life in my childhood to spend my time working to get to where i am. and i got rejected. so thank you for being so sweet about the matter. dont you dare EVER pass judgement on me because i would never have passed judgement on you. i'm sorry, maybe you've never had dreams but when your dreams dont come true sometimes its really hard to deal with. you don't know me. you don't know the shit i deal with everyday. and true, i don't know you either but that's no excuse for you to write something so assanine and ignorant to me. i really think i deserve some form of an apology.
One door closes, another opens...Trust in the infinite wisdom of the universe, child...Take a moment, take a deep breath, and take time to count your blessings...You haven't lost your talents, have you?
I didn't know you were going to take my post this serious. just chill out man. go out and get laid or something. lol.
i'm sorry it's a touchy subject. that post just really offended me... you have to admit it was just a tad harsh... but whatever IDL all is in the past lol. and cozmo.. you're pretty awesome. i've had a lot of time to think. and i feel better, just different in a way. but the talent is certainley not gone and i'm still working hard. i guess my path is taking me somewhere new and i'm just gonna accept it till i see where it brings me to.
