Hello, everyone. I'm new here and would just greatly appreciate some advice from the other women here on this forum. I'm 18 and have been masturbating for about a year now and I'm pretty sure I've never had an orgasm. As you can imagine, this is very frustrating for me! My boyfriend always says that orgasms are always great feeling and I'm just an eensy bit jealous since I've never had one. (Also, I only masturbate by rubbing externally, if I try to go inside it doesn't feel pleasurable one bit and is actually a bit uncomfortable after a certain point, so I don't bother. So much for my G-spot!) Each and every time I've masturbated I've gotten to a point that it starts to feel very good but then the spot sort've just "disappears" and I'm unable to find it again for a few minutes, leaving me frustrated afterward. Now I admit I don't know very much about masturbation since the topic is relatively new to me, but how exactly will I know when I've had an orgasm? My boyfriend said I would just instinctively know that it happened but I'd like to know a sign or two that gives you a heads up you're going to get one. Thanks for taking the time to read my silly question.
Well he's right for one. After YEARS of masturbation I actually had my first orgasm this past august after I read that clitoral stimulation is the main way women orgasm. Well, I'm going to assume you don't know what the clit is, but when you're wet and horny, it's that little bump above your vagina that tingles and makes you gasp when you touch it (yay for thousands of nerve endings!) It's different for most girls, I like to tease around my clit for a while, barely touching it, then give direct stimulation, by rubbing hard and that brings me to orgasm. However some girls say its too much stimulation for direct pressure, so then just teasing around it is enough for them. Try that and see how that works for you. Every womans body is different. Just listen to it
Thanks for replying! Yeah, I'm pretty sure what I'm rubbing is, in fact, my clitoris since it does feel good whenever I lightly touch or rub it. However, after a certain length of time by rubbing it, it just all together disappears and I'm unable to find the pleasurable spot again, due to it going under the hood, I believe? After this point I'm just kind of unsure what to do next to start feeling good again.
I've had that happen before and I don't know why. How I stpped it though was I began to use lotion (I know I know, buy the good stuff, but I can't afford it. Poor college student) when I masturbated. That kept my clit from disappearing and frustrating me. I guess of forgot about that til you brought up that it went away during. I use a natrual lotion from the company of Melaluca (great company, great products!) so I'm not as worried about chems being down there on me. Try a lube or natural lotion and see if that works.
Alrighty, thank you very much for the advice. I have some lotion laying around here somewhere that I'll get around to using next time.
Go to Dodson and Ross, watch the video-podcasts and read some articles. Other resource is Scarleteen but it's more general sex info than "how to". The most important articles: First time orgasm – read carefully G-spot orgasms Drawings of female anatomy – might not work – there are some problems with this part of the site. Important video-podcasts: Clitoral anatomy Lubrication Genital fitness About clit Clit, orgasms, multiple orgasms Masturbation Clit and Masturbation Go to The Clitoris and educate yourself. I suggest you pay special attention to “Anatomy & Bodily Function" section. The information is regularly updated but the form of this site is very archaic. Other useful resources for better understanding of your anatomy are TeenWire diagrams and 3D Vulva. You may like to watch Female Orgasm Explained – it's a full documentary hosted by Google video. Other site I'd recommend is Clitical.
