I've recently begun having sex with the most wonderful woman. She and I are compatible on so many levels...except one. I never thought I would seriously have this issue, and yet I now find myself deeply concerned about it. To put it simply, I cause her pain each and every time we have sex. Last night ended with her in tears and me feeling hopeless. Sex is awkward because I am often not able to get aroused because of the fear of hurting her once intercourse begins. We've tried different positions and levels of penetration to no avail. I am asking for any suggestions to help my woman and I solve this problem. The only things I can think of is to use copious amounts of lubrication and to be more gentle, using only part of my length when we have sex. Can anyone offer insight into how to overcome this? Do any of you have experience with this kind of situation? Thanks in advance for your help...
Just keep doing what you're doing, time and patience will solve your problem. She will "loosen up" over time. Good luck bro.
I have experience with the situation because my ex was so large that I was in so much pain I couldn't orgasm. He was 10 inches and flippin' girthy. I have a tiny vagina and he couldn't even get it all the way in without forcing it and hitting my cervix. I get extremely wet but even with lube it didn't help. It didn't get any better for me. Honestly, I don't really have any advice. Nothing worked for me so I have no clue. I know it sucks but hearing that come from you is really hott. =/
well how old r u? if ur partner is young she is bound to be much tighter than the average woman.....or u just have a monster cock in which case she will probably adjust to it.
First, I'm sorry you and your friend for having this trouble, but this is solvable. I’ve run into this problem once before and addressed it by slowly stretching the vaginal canal with dildos. This is a time consuming process that is very dependent on how much larger your penis is compared to her vaginal canal. You must consider two variants, Length & Girth. Length variant: is depth the issue? If you are nine inches and she can only comfortably sheathe eight inches you can try addressing this with variable lengths of dildos. Do not go for girth but length and slowly (at her pace ‘days, weeks, months’) stretch her vaginal canal. Girth variant: is girth the issue? Use the same technique as length, but with variations of thicker and thicker dildos. Again, go at her pace. If she is all you say she is, then she is worth the wait. I hope this helps you both. ByteMe69
Have you tried a cock ring? Put it at the base of your cock, keeps you from going in too deep. Though, obviously this will only help if length is your issue.
you definitely don't want to do things like doggie style and any other deep penatration angles right now, if anything missionary is your only option. it sounds like girth is your major issue, if different levels of penetration are problems anyway.
Try different positions too, I had my ex who was VERY long and he would slam into my cervix without meaning too. Have her on top and let her take it as she can, eventually as she relaxes everything will stretch out and it will be much better for the both of you.
I had this problem with my newest girlfriend and a few flings, and the thing thats made it ok with me and my current girl is a change in position, she usually starts on top so she can control what is happening, and then once we're both close, I go on top and take things slowly and increase the passion levels, we both climax and noone gets hurt!
I am very grateful to all of you for your kind words, support and welcome advice... We are working through the issue day to day, and with lots more foreplay and cunnilingus (OM NOM NOM NOM!), we have seen a decrease in the amount of pain she has during intercourse. Also, she is learning to enjoy 'cowgirl' as it allows for her to control the angle and depth of penetration. Good times! Hiyas, Orgasmik! LTNS!
UR getting smarter, lad. Actually there s no reason for intercourse except for procreation, so until then the old tongue in the pussy oughtta do just fine. Then (and only then - after the cunni) she can hand you an orgasm. Not a bad way to go thru life. When you wanna kid, she'll have to hurt a coupla times. Then back to cunni and hand or mouth.
Apart from what was said earlier: use fingers before and finger her clit (or she can do that) during insertion. When I use my rabbit vibe (it's a bit to wide for me) it always helps me to have a quick clitoral orgasm, rest a bit, then stretch myself with fingers. Turning on the clit attachment during insertion also has a soothing effect. Remember that when it comes to girth there is nothing time and preparations can't do. Seen a newborns head? So patience and stretching there. As goes for length - the cervix tends to lift during very high stage of arousal giving your penis extra room. If your girl is very conscious of her body she can tell when it happens. It is discussed well in the Barbara Kessling's book Super Sexual Orgasm. Much of the book is utter propaganda but bits about helping your cervix go up are well written. If you'd like to “borrow” the book let me know (invisible_at_adresik.com). That goes for everyone here ;-)
sounds like ur on track so long as she doesnt have any infections that might bring here disconfort, been in a simalar situation, bit bozze and the dont feel it as much that or you miss out for the night
If the pain is becuase she is so tight, and/or you are so thick, go for much more foreplay and more lube, just like the other members said. Finger her quite a bit, and consider using toys on her that are gradually thicker. Also, do what ever she needs to feel "in the mood" and very horny. The cervix is in the general area of the end of the vagina, but it is not exactly up there at the end like a cap is on a bottle. It is on the upper end of the front wall of the vagina. Try to slide the head of your penis along the back or rear wall of her vagina. That should allow your head to glide right by the cervix and go and inch or two deeper in.
I'm not particularly large but my fiance is particularly small and so we have this issue as well. I've said it before but I just finger fuck her until she comes a couple of times and she loosens right up. Same deal with the cervix though I rarely touch it unless we're going doggy style. Good luck, bro.
