So anyone got a clue? Not me.

So this is the only thread of this kind that I'll make, 'cause I'm sure you've all got better things to do with your time, and I'm sure it gets repetitive.

I'm 19, just finished mah first year at the University of Utah (hooray!), and I have no idea what the hell is going on in my head/body. I'd like to be able to come out and say I'm straight and I think I'm gay, but I'm really not sure what to call what it, so I'll let you decide. Majority rules, ya know?

1. I could see myself in a romantic relationship (long term) with another guy, and I'm sexually attracted to guys, but I don't seem to find any good looking, aside from the occasional 1 in about 40.

2. On the other hand, i find girls attractive more often at face value, like 1 in 5, however, I couldn't see myself growing old, having my kids with a women.

3. I'm cool with being either, it's just the indecision is killing me. Hell, I'd rather be gay, because that feels more natural. I guess the fact that I don't find guys that attractive is the thing that's killing me, combined with the fact that I find girls more attractive more often than guys is just fucking confusing.iggy:

So. I write alot. Whaddya think? I'm a cool guy, enjoy long walks on the beach, panda bears...etc.

 

Why Not "Bat For Both Teams", And See How It All Pans Out..



Cheers Glen.

 

I'm going to take a guess and say it's mental conditioning that you don't find guys attractive at face value. Firstly, you're obviously Bisexual, you find both attractive so there isn't any doubting it. Sure you may be more leaning in one direction, but you're Bi nontheless. You're pretty much the opposite of me. I find loads of guys I find attractive, but only one in every hundred of girls I feel sexually attracted to. Yet it's a woman who I want to grow old and have kids with, etc.

Writing it down helps alot, I remember posting here a lil' while back and writing down what was going in my mind ordered things up in my mind and it felt like a massive relief, I'm now completely comfortable with my sexuality, so you could try writing to straighten out your own head aswell. Wierd, but it works.

Anywho, as I said, it could be social pressure to only be attracted to girls which is why you find guys less attractive when checking 'em out, or you could just be very choosy.

In short, don't get worked up about it. You are what you are and you don't need to worry about the label which applies to you, just sleep with whomever you wanna sleep with and see how it goes.

 

The question Am I gay or straight, is very hypothetical, meaning that it has very little practical relevance to having sex with someone, man or women. For example, imagine you make your mind up and you say "Well I am straight" At this point in time, what good does answering the question do? To me, it does very little, sure you like this type of body, but people are FAR FAR more than bodies, in the sense that merly understanding whether you are attracted to them, far underweighs the vital question of; how can you make your relationships better with all people, so as to create an avenue through which sexuality can be communicated comfortably and openly?

Dont get me wrong, the question is vital as well. But in the context you are in it is short of useless.|This question would be more useful if you were wanting to pick up someone and have sex with them the same night, then the question is vital...but in your present context it is essentially useless to partake in focusing in this question and it would only drain you with no reward.

You got nothing to loose anyways, just pleasure to gain, have fun with it all.

 

Despite what you might think, copying and pasting the same answer into every post isn't helpfull when the askers are different individuals, not to mention you aren't helping them reach a conclusion at all, you're just telling them not ask in the first place. :|

 

I didnt have time. You came to many conclusions in the thick of a couple of seconds and its not very beneficial because people are way more complicated than that and multiple reasons could be behind their intentions.

You obviously dont have the mental capacity to see why this question is irrelevant in the contexts of the lives that people choose to live.

Your conclusion is arbitrary and I suggest you give reasons for your outrageous claims and take time to ask questions before coming to conclusions about peoples multifaceted intentions that are by no means simple.

To re-iterate, I did not ask him to drop the question, I merly asked that he look to see if the question in the context I placed it in and to be weary about the limitations of such a question and the emotions that create for it.

 

What you said has some relevance, but is not necessarily true. I understand that there is far more to people than outward appearance, but you assume that every single personality is androgynous, and essentially, ambiguous. I, you, and most other people have no idea what exactly attraction is, but I can assure you, there are things about themselves that people should know regarding their interests, and possibly who they may love, is of vital importance to one's happiness and wellness. Sexuality does not have to necessarily become comfortable if you can define your interests before you make all relationships around you better; which is inefficient and a whole different subject altogether regarding attitudes.

In my situation, I believe I would benefit greatly to know exactly what my interests are. It would allow me to focus on other things, rather than devoting a portion of my thoughts to this every single minute of the day. IN the end, the reward would be self-enlightenment and peace, which I can say with steady confidence, is very, very important and meaningful to the individual and his relationships. lol. I'm done.:hat:

 

You didnt undestand what I said. My knowledge is contextual. The reason is that I agree, you need to know what interests you. What I meant is that what a person requires from another person in relation to sex can change the question and/or make it useless. In many instances I have found that answering the question and my personal happiness is useless because I require that I am in touch with the persons mind before any sexual aspects open up. In your situation, it seemed a nessecary component. To sum it up, trying to find out what this experience means is not the same context that the question your are using employs. I was merly warning you of the limitations that this question poses for you. I did not say that the question was limited and useless, period, rather that it does not employ the contextual requirements that your post seemed to communicate were a part of your sexual experience.

I personally will never answer the question, unless I have decided that a must comit to either guys or girls or both, in some situation in the future. For example, if someone asks me where I would rather move to, in regards to a city, I would embark on utilizing this question because it is the type of context that this question employs and would be useful to me and my future satisfaction. Or another example would be, do you want to go to a gay bar or a straight bar? In this question I would embark the use of the question at hand because it makes direct inference to the context of the question; which type of sex would you like to experience. Once in that club, the question is useless, however, in the sense that the context has now changed. Now its more of question about what type of person you are and how that reflects who you are attracted to and feel satisfied with.

I hope this clears it up. Good fun and nice convo.