I live in a world that seems pretty damn empty sometimes. I'm 33, married, and sick all the time. I was diagnosed with systemic lupus 11 years ago and ever since then I've been unable to hold a steady job, or even a regular hobby for crying out loud. My point is that I've been on everything you can imagine...patches, pills, shots, IVs, chemotherapy...and none of it has made me feel all that much better. I go to a VA hospital because I can't afford anything else, and yes, I am a veteran. Pretty much every VA thinks that anyone asking for pain relief is some kind of junkie looking for a fix. They don't seem to understand that there are a whole hell of a lot of us out there that don't want to NEED these things! So recently I threw in the towel. I'm trying hard to kick my vicoden and morphine addiction, but it's not easy when you actually do kind of need those things to get by. They do give me some sort of pain relief, enough that I need them right now. I can't help but wonder though if it's all in my head and that I would be able to get by without it all if I just tried a bit harder. Anyway, I'm here because I feel alone in everything I think and feel. Everything from religion to family. I don't seem to have either. I thought I was Wiccan...maybe just Pagan....maybe I really am Christian. i don't know. I'm the only one in the state of PA without kids, I don't go to soccer games and pass out kool aid...I spoil my pet rats, I watch Aqua Teen and Tim and Eric, I use a wheelchair on the days I can't walk on my own...where in the hell do i fit? Labels are so friggin' important to everyone these days, well, what do you do when you don't have, or even want one? So here I am, just looking for some people to talk to that I feel more connected with.
hey lady.. :grouphug: plenty of great people here. you should stop by the chatroom sometime if you need some comic relief.
lovin u heatherama... is that name from futrama btw, i read u liked cartoons, futurama is the shit, yes plz stop by the hipchat, it rocks, ule find plenty of friends on this forum either way
Welcome Aboard 'Heatherama' Feel free to take your time an look around This is a good place to start Enjoy our forums
You might say I'm a bit of a Futurama fan. More like a nerd....I have a Fry tattoo even. Hehehehe. Luckily my tattoo artist is a fan too and was really excited to do it, he even took pics and called others over to see it.
i been trough some really bad times to before they where able to 'cure' my desise and even if i know it's not that easy i got a good advise for you 'let it be' =) (beatles) peace and love UWS sorry for my english (i'm from Quebec)
I think I got my settings backwards...need to adjust that. I have all the current stuff first and I am scrolling all the way to the end to see the posts in the right order. Oops. You guys will have to excuse me, I'm REALLY new to all of this. I don't even smoke anything at the moment. My interest is in medical MJ. I have a lot of health issues, a lot of pain, and I live in a fucked up state.
Like-minded?? You wouldn't like my mind! I can honestly say I feel your pain. I am recovering from a muscle wasting syndrome caused by a prescription side effect. It's been over a year since I stopped taking the drug and am just recently nearing recovery. Along with the weakness and depression (which the MD wanted to give me MORE drugs for!!!) the muscle pain was intense. I have a very high threshold for pain. You can't be a woodworker if you don't. This pain put me on my ass. My main painkiller was good weed. Helped with the depression, too. Really expensive though. My other drug was force of will. My only suggestion is to keep up the fight. Things can get better. My best to you and you'll be in my thoughts and prayers. Oh...and a hearty HOWDY to ya!!! Zen
Hey there If you ever need someone to talk to, I'm normally around here somewhere. Just shoot me a message and I can try and help. Sorry things haven't been going your way. Hold out though. They'll turn around eventually.