Alright here's the deal...the real deal. I will be eternally in debt to anyone who can help me with this. All throught school and high school I had a girlfriend. I was never single. Right after I turned 18 I broke up with my girlfriend and I have not dated or slept with anyone since then. I will be 21 this September. I purposly took the last two years off to find myself, who I want to be and where I want to go in life. I have recently done all of that. The problem being I am now so far out of the game I have NO idea as how to get back in. I also recently found myself with not one friend left in the world but that story shall be saved for another post. So I cannot use friends for hook-ups. I have no idea where to start or what to do. Please help. Your reward will be good karma, a happy conscience, and peace of mind knowing you helped a lost soul. Peace and Love
Go to parties? Maybe Craigslist or some sort of online personals? Why not living your life, and just keeping an eye out for that one lucky lady?
If you found yourself, as you say, this should not be a problem. If you found yourself, you'd be living an interesting life and naturally attracting interesting people. It does not sound to me like you found yourself, otherwise simple social interaction would not be so difficult. Go and join a club or sports team or something. Mingle with people who have similar interests in a social setting. The rest will take care of itself. But sitting there wondering how to "get back into the game" and feeling sorry for yourself will not solve anything. That is how you carry yourself and thus, appear to others, as desperate and you will turn people away from you. Chill out, relax, actually improve your life instead of just saying you have, do interesting things, OCCUPY yourself, than see what happens.
I can't improve on this... Apparently you haven't found yourself so... keep looking? Desperation is a stench that repels people- you gotta be okay with flying solo.... be found as you're doing your thing and you won't have to live up to some act and line of bullshit delivered in a club or party. Don't dwell on being single.
Wow you guys in the last two posts were totally right. You read through my bullshit better than I could. I guess I needed a different perspective. Thank you for providing another point of view. I needed it. Tough but heart felt. Peace and Love you're both right!
I don't really see how I could find myself without friendship. I think it's crappy individualistic thinking. We find ourselves by doing, not thinking by ourselves in a cold corner. We find ourselves by relating and working together. My advice: friends first--.
Im sorry but you are very wrong. Finding ourselves is not just by relating to others and working together, thats just whats right for you. Finding yourself is done by looking at yourself from outside yourself and thinking "here's who and what I want to be, here's what I can fix about me." You don't need others to do it at all, in fact it is mostly a personally, solitary thing. Just because you need others to do this does not mean I nor neccesarily anyone else does. And if you think personal time is "thinking by ourselves in a cold corner" I feel sorry for you. Thinking for and by yourself makes anyone a strong, intelligent, unique person who does not need others praise or opinions to feel right about their own. I resent your comment "crappy individualistic thinking" I am a very intelligent, introspective person with a lot to offer any conversation or relationship I'm confronted with. Again you said YOU could not find yourself without friends. Well thats you. Don't make me feel guilty, less then or stupid for being able to do so on my own. Maybe you need to become a bit more of an individual so you can think, find yourself and improve yourself without the approval of others.
Okey doke. It was just my two cents, I'm not asking you to follow my advice if you don't want to or anything.
