Well my bf and i have been dating for about a year now and he never wants to have sex unless i bring it up and even then it feels like more of a chore than him really wanting to. I consider myself to be attractive i mean other guys hit on me all the time i even wear stripper outfits to turn him on. Nothing works all he wants to do is "smoke" and sleep. When i try to talk to him about it he gives me the cold shoulder. It is becoming very difficult not to cheat. What should i do?
whats he smoking... if its pot then theres ur answer. maybe he has low labido. go to a sports supplment store, and buy some herbal testosterone boosters. i use them to help with working out, but they make me real horny and stuff which is good. i take em and want to fuck my gf everyday, i cant get enough of her. shes a hot latina. hope that helps. does he get hard?
I kinda figured someone would say that but its weird i know other guys woh do the same thing and dont have that problem. i know everyone is diffrent but this is becoming too difficult to deal with. I mean he is a good guy and all but cant live without that needed attention!
your boyfriend has hit the girlfriend goldmine and doesnt know it...i would slap him if i could reach him....
If you love him, accept him as he is. Sex is not very important. He probably resents all the pressure to perform. I recommend you just drop it for a while, and see if he brings it up. However, don't resent him during this period. It's just him and his cycle. (Yes, men have cycles). It's not often talked about, but women actually want sex much more often than men do. Men just want it with new women more than women want it with new men. Most men will say that no woman is as good as their own hand...but I've never met a woman who insisted masturbation was better (maybe better than some particular guy, but not generally better). It's also just possible that he's not sharing something he's feeling with you because he either doesn't want to hurt you or he doesn't want to fight...Just possible..
There is so much wrong with this post.... "Sex isnt important" - Sex is very, very important in a relationship. Sure, by random miraculous chance a couple of people who both dont want sex and dont care that the other one doesnt want it might get together and be happily sexless, but that is the very rare exception, not the rule. People like to say it isnt "important" because the societal conditioning against sexual freedom makes them think that they are morally inferior if they attach too much "importance" to sex. I think Maslow had the right idea - sex is right down there with air, food, water, homeostasis and excretion. It is a physiological need with far reaching pshycological effects. Believe me, I have seen first hand the effect that a situation like this has on a woman, since I used to be exactly the same as her BF. Thinking about how things (everything in our relationship) were back then compared to how they are now, its like night and day. I got past my issues (which had nothing to do with smoking weed) and now we have an amazing sex life which has made every other aspect of our lives better. "Just drop it for awhile" - She isnt trying to talk him into new wallpaper man. This is a situation that makes her feel bad about herself, bad about her relationship, almost hopeless as she contemplates cheating on the man she is with in order to satisfy a very real need, but that contemplation causes shame and more bad feelings. This isnt something will just go away with time, or get better by itself. She needs to talk to him about it, and MAKE him talk back to her. This is the first step, and it can be hard. But you have to get the real talk going. This is definitely a time to be compassionate and understanding, and know that you will likely have to push him to the point where he expresses himself in what may be an angry way. Dont get angry back, thats the key. Once the real talk starts, it builds on itself and things start getting resolved. "Men just want it with new women" - Never in the 14 years we have been together did I ever stop wanting my wife sexually. Never has there been someone I wanted more than her. The instinctual drive to procreate does make me look at other women sexually, but none of them have ever been as attractive as my wife. In this context, this argument is akin to "Im just not a sexual person" - a defense mechanism to keep light off the real issue. It is almost insulting to bring it up TBH. "No woman is as good as thier own hand" - This may be true for some guys, maybe the majority of guys. From my standpoint, masturbation is absolutely nothing like sex. It isnt even close. If I could do with my hand what I can do with a woman, I'd never leave the house. None of that is important though, becuase in this context, it is either more defense, or pure and simple selfishness, looking at sex as though the only purpoise is to get the male off. That is definitely insulting. "It's also just possible that he's not sharing something he's feeling with you because he either doesn't want to hurt you or he doesn't want to fight...Just possible." Not just possible, almost certain in fact. Far, far more likely than any of that other BS. To the OP - look at this post carefully, because once you start trying to make him talkm this si the kind os BS you will hear at first. Dont buy it. Keep pushing until you get to the real issue - the thing he doesnt want to say for fear of hurting you (which he is doing in spades right now without realisiing it) or that he is ashamed of. Good luck...
Thanks kama that was very enlightening i have tried to talk to him but ill keep trying because he really is a good guy and i would hate to leave or cheat on him because of this issue.
the supplments are the only thing that are goin to actually dramatically change things. they will give him raging boners and wanting to fuck everyday.
