getting threatened at work by an illegal immigrant

Get some liquid and dose his drink. You could just sneak up to the back door and holler La Migra La Migra Departmente Imagracion!!! just to see how fast he runs.

 

i say go down to the local police station and ask them what to do. you definitely don't wanna start a fight with some lunatic who swings a knife around all the time.

i saw someone else suggest sitting down and talking to him. that might help too. if there's a way you can communicate with him. i get the impression that he only fucks with you because he's paranoid about what you're really not saying and what you're really not doing to him.

 

By "liquid" you must mean "rat poison", right?

 

rat poison causes hemorrhaging.

 

Alcohol causes inebriation.

 

just clarifying to help figure out quantities.

 

snitches get stitches.
everytime he fks with ya, just ask him where his green card is.

 

In this case, snitches get a tap on the back and a handshake from a thick necked immigration cop.

The more the merrier?

 

Well, you don't want the guy vomiting blood

that raises eyebrows

just enough to stop them.

 

Guy's an illegal. No one would notice or care.

 

Well, okay, I GUESS

almost be better off dosing him with LSD.

 

That was my first thought.

But you might as well dose yourself with LSD instead.

 

not really, illegal, screaming, ranting, heavy dose of acid he can't handle.

shit, what can he do about that?

police will notice, arrest, and deport.

 

...that might just make him actually stick the knife into the OP.

 

do it before shift ends

duh.

be miles away.

 

...and be responsible for the crazy Mexican's murder rampage?

 

Only partially responsible.

And honestly, it'd render more lulz than getting your employer fined.

 

With that I cannot disagree.

 

I hate interesting threads where we never hear the ending.

 

OP got cut up, yo!