This is a rather long story and I think im best starting somewhat near the start and i'll try shorten it. We dated way back when, just under 5 years ago. After we split up from an 11 month long relationship (with no sex, we wanted to. But lack of place and both inexperienced we never did) roughly a year after, we started having sex, just as a "friends with benefits" kind of set up. And it's been like that on and off. Now it's been roughly 4 years since we actually broke up and we have been doing this friends with benefits since then. Often with HUGE gaps inbetween, sometimes a year, sometimes 6 months. Often because one of us had a partner. But right now she is in a relationship and we are fooling around at the same time (I know its wrong...) But the thing is, she will let ask me to go down on her, and let me get myself off over her but that's it. She wont actually have sex, because she is in a relationship... I really don't get it at all. Why would someone let another person perform oral on them, and accept them getting themselves off over her but sex and physical contact from her side is a no no. She knows I have feelings for her and always have, even through other relationships, and sometimes i think shes trying to play me. The thing is, it's not just that she wont have sex that's bothering me, it's basically the whole set up. If she wants to do "stuff" with me, then why is sex off the table? And why does she need two guys doing this for her? If she wanted me, she knows all she has to do is ask. I'd date her again in an instance, I really do not understand her. What would you guys do in this situation? Thanks.
maybe she enjoys you giving her oral and her boyfriend really sucks at it lol i dunno but i think you should stop before it bites you on the ass
Does the other guy know, or is she doing this behind his back? Because this might be rules they set in the relationship. You know, like they agreed that fooling around happens, but sex is over the line. I know a few people who do that.
same here. I kinda believe in that. i think oral isnt that bad or cheating when you just begun dating someone
The first time we did it, she mentioned feeling really guilty as she has a boyfriend (which i did know, she just mentioned it) But I really don't know whether he knows, when ever i ask questions like that, she usually changes the subject or backs out in some way. She has mentioned before, she doesn't want a "cute boyfriend" she wants security and safety. Now the thing is, her boyfriend is 7 years older than both of us and has a car, steady job etc. Where as Im a student, no money, no house, hard to work. I sometimes think this comes into play, but still doesnt explain why she wont just treat me like a normal fuck buddy :/
i think there is more information from your girls part. if she will even let you go down on her, then she still wants you. The boyfriend who im guessing doesnt know is a guy who just wants a girlfriend for the sake of having one. if she really likes the guy, she wouldnt come back to you. you should talk to her about yours and hers feelings.
I think the view on this may be a little close minded. I try to think of possible work around, but when push comes to shove. It is probably just her wanting 2 (possibly more) guys after her. One on a leash (me) and another she actually treats like a human being.
oooooorr her boyfriend is a busy man. being 27 and doing all that. might have no time and he shouldnt be going out with a girl that young. hes at that age where he might wanna get serious and shes not being very serious. but then again he might figure that out sooner or later. Stop what you 2 are doing and slap her in the face.
