Location: South Florida Age: 36 Male Posts: 1 Newbie Here Hi All, I happened to stumble upon this great website and this forum, and apparently, none too soon. I very much relate to the so called hippie lifestyle. I have often felt like an outsider as a result of being non-conventional, but I guess after 36 years, I am exhausted. I am a gay male with a sense of spirituality, living here in the land of plastic in South Florida. I feel very disconnected with others around here,lost and isolated. At times, I feel almost suicidal, if truth be told. I am seeking some sense of community, even though it may be an online community. I am seeking your experiences of how you keep going through this life. I am seeking peace, ultimately, but I seem to be losing my grasp. Also, seeking any recommendations (books, places, etc...) to help someone to start over. Thank you and I look forward to hearing from you.
It concerns me everytime I hear of someone saying that they are feeling suicidal. Really, aside from being terminally ill & wanting to take control of it is there anything that is worth killing yourself for? I know when you're at what seems to be the bottom of the pit it may seem like there is no hope but also when you are at the bottom the only way to go is up. If your issue is that you are gay in what seems to be the heart of homophobic fools maybe the answer is to look a little farther for people who can think sanely. I have thought but have no personal experience that Miami had a strong GLBT community. Of course you may know better than I possibly could. I did a google search miami gay & found that there are a few bars, some businesses, & a couple of gyms but didn't find any local support groups like I usually do which does have me wondering about any Rainbow strength there. I tried Miami glbt & this link it seemed a little better. When I did a search for Key West I got this Now that looks pretty good. I also just plain triedFlorida GLBT google that has quite a bit of good looking prospects. Ft Lauderdale looks great. Wish I had known that when I was there for a week. Am I understanding right that you are just coming out or maybe just coming back out? That opens up a whole new batch of thoughts that can be shared if that is the case. I don't want to reinvent the wheel if that isn't the cse though. Let us know more if that is so. There are a great bunch of minds here who love to support each other.
No, its not really a gay issue, per say. I am ok with being gay and have been "out and proud" for a while now. I think its more of a human issue and just feeling disconnected as a person and emotionally, spiritually and physically exhausted. I dont even know how or when to being to try to re-charge my batteries. I welcome any advice or help. Peaceseeker
Well, that's different then. I still stick to my statement that there is little to move yourself to the next life over though. I hope you aren't really thinking of suicide. If so please, please rely on a quicker medium than a newsgroup for support. Pick up the phone & dial the nearest suicide prevention line or run don't walk to their office so you can get someone to help you get over this feeling. If you are just feeling way the heck down & want someone to talk with but don't have any real plans of doing anything drastic this is just the kind of place. The anonymity of the net is good for many things. You can say what ever the heck you want here & may be inhibited to actually tell a live person that face to face. I have a couple of questions that are really meant for you to think of & answer for yourself. Obviously if you want to share the answers you can or if you feel that they are necessary to make all of this more clear by all means do so. Can you trace when you first started feeling disconnected as a person and emotionally, spiritually and physically exhausted? Is there anything that you can point to that may have brought this on? Is there anything that you feel you can do to change whatever the causes of your depression may be? Is it possible to let go of the problem in any way? Even a little letting go could give you a breather so you can regroup. For me, I will either do some strenuous exercise or meditate in a peaceful nature setting or put on my prettiest dress, do my make-up well & just let myself be a beautiful as I can or maybe put on my sexiest outfit & go see if I can pick up a hot stud. These are what work for me. Individual mileage will vary. Exercise & meditation are what is recommended by many as the best method. Many will say that looking for casual sex at such times is the worst way to handle it. A few will say that just doing something to make you feel pretty or handsome if you prefer is a fairly good idea but some think it is superficial. I used to say that you should have a few doobers but I have found that just postpones the problems at best. They can help you get over some minor things though.
I think the problem PeaceSeeker is talking about is the "plastic" nature of what he has seen of the gay community where he is. Let's face it--much of gay life and nongay life is pretty superficial. In many places, if you want to be around gay men, it seems like you have to deal with loud music and a meat market atmosphere. If you have a sense of spirituality, check out New Age and spiritual resources. I found some of what I seek through the peace movement. This forum has also helped some.
ABSOLUTELY!!! You hit the nail on the head. But where do I even start? I welcome any suggestions. Thank you for your post!
