Last night I partook on the awesome journey of the mushroom experience once again. I weighed 5 grams out and began the journey. I ended up only eating 3 grams, but it was still enough to show me what needed to be shown. The mushrooms knew exactly how to perturb my mind now. All my worries over the past few weeks were brought up to the surface and my ego was shattered in to pieces. I laid down on the floor rolling around, moving and flowing with the trip, watching and controlling everything that was moving. My mind is constant deep thought and revelation. I watched as the mushroom permeated my thoughts, and began to tell the story. I let the mushrooms carry me as the story unfolded. This whole scenario played out in my head, where as reality was like waking up in a dream. All these people are there in the dream, and when you wake up it just one thing dreaming all this. I remembered a dream i had when i was little where i had to tell everyone they were in a dream, i had to tell them to wake up. I realized that what it was trying to explain was our own spiritual awakening, and that's when my own awakening begun. I went downstairs to my basement and sat in this big white chair i have. The chair is big enough where it has arm rest and i can still put my legs up and meditate in it. I pulled a couple gravity bongs of sour diesel, sat up and crossed my legs, closed my eyes, and began to meditate. I sat as a little buddha, body perfectly still, watching my breath, watching the mind as it went in and out of thought. All i had learned over the past couple months all came up, creating and painting a story. Then suddenly my mind still, i opened my eyes, everything began to morph together, like open eye dmt visuals. Everything morphed and grew with mathmatical percision. It was space, then more then space, then more then more then space. I felt like i was looking at something so far advanced and beyond me it was impossible to put into words. I realized that everything in this universe every word, every feeling, it was all going towards something so completely beyond us. Even compassion is a dirty word compared to the complete and utter brilliance and pefection that lies beneath the vail. As i stared at this brilliant object, i got the feeling like this was everything, all matter in one object, i felt like i was supposed to get inside it, and i would become everything, and have all knowledge. Then i got this feeling like it wasn't my time. At the same time though i had amazing knowledge. I just knew things, i had no idea how. Thats when it happend though. Thats when i saw the end. I closed my eyes, body pefectly still, mind perfectly still, clear, reflecting everything. Then there was this sound. Like the sound of a million people humming at once, and the sound was resonating, getting louder and louder, i could see these white strings vibrating. Then it began to create this image, then i realized i could control the image, i could feel a presence, like a strange attractor who had always been there, then the sound rang off, and suddenly it was over, and i was left in state of perfectness. It was the all that is nothing, beyond perception and non perception, the zen, the absolute, the end. It was completly formless, i was free. Then i came down, down through the formless, down through the immense white light, down through the thought form, down through emotion. I had made it, i was awake. There was amazing sense of this is all happening for a reason, i was allowed amazing access to something only very few have seen. I'm not sure what it all means yet, i feel like there is still a another stage that will tie everything together. Whats interesting about that last formless state is you get a similar feeling when your inside a catholic church. It is opitamy of the holy feeling. Except at the end it is much more perfect and beyond feeling.
Mushrooms can produce something this beautiful? I felt like I was reading poetry ... Were you scared at all, Or just felt cleansed and happy?
sounds like quite a trip man. let me ask you: are you fully grounded in reality still? do you still view things the same? have you ever had an experience like this before? what has changed?
i have had experiences close to this before, but nothing exactly like this. this was the creme da la creme, the al la ma vida mucha el mala machla. I came back tho, i'm still me, my meditations are so silent and still now tho. I can finnally completely clear my mind.
Wow, completely amazing.. Hmm i wonder if it will all stay with you for awhile, or maybe even forever? When do you plan to trip again?
Beautifully written! That couldn't have been easy to get the words together. You've been blessed, for sure! Just remember, though, it's not the experience or even the knowledge or ability-- it's the love...the love you now know-- you're an agent of that love, if you want to be.
