good looking guy alone

i got a guy friend already 21 who is good looking, smart, friendly, everybody likes him, but he's never had a gf and refuses to have any. he talks to girls with no problem but he just seems not interested on more than a simple frienship with them. and no he is not gay, i know him good enough and i see how he looks at women. but then wtf is wrong with him?? he don't tell any body why he's still single. is there an specific issue he might have for this strange behavior? or is he really just hiding he's gay from every one, even from his best friend??...i really doubt it...
sometimes i think it might be some kind of childhood trauma or something since he had some family problems growing up but he looks perfectly normal.

 

Maybe there's just other things that he views as being more important in his life and therefore prioritizes them over having a "girlfriend."

 

maybe hes just extreamly picky.
hes probably the type that is waiting for someone who walks past them, hes jaw drops. you know?
hes sure of what he wants, and he hasn't found it yet.
OR, hes afraid of commitment.

 

why not just accept your friend for who he is?

 

This describes me perfectly. I don't fall for many girls at all, but when I do ... I swear it like ... unlocks my brain and everything starts clicking. I don't really get nervous, I just completely go after what I want. I just can't motivate myself unless there's a spark that ignites a fire way down inside.

 

well i guess that does make alot of sence, its just unusual u know...

 

well its just he's almost 22 already u know, and not one girl, i mean cmon!...and he's the kind of guy that every one stares at, give me a break he gets girls talking to him all the time, its just frustraiting...but i guess u r right...-.-

 

Or the girls just want him for sex, dont think he's boyfriend material cos there would be too much competition from other girls, he doesnt have much trouble hooking up with girls, and that has to be kept hidden from his guy friends so they dont get sooky, her girl friends so they dont get bitchy / judgemental.

They'll have dinner with their boyfriends, get driven home say they have to get up early or not in the mood,boyfriend maybe gets a kiss goodnight at the door a wave goodbye then they'll go inside change clothes then duck over his place for an hour of hot nookie, then back home a hot shower and then a good nights sleep

If you say he's the kind of guy girls stare at all the time, then it sounds like thats whats going on.

You say you know your friend? are you with him every minute of every day?

 

Ugh. I honestly cant stand guys like that. Unless you're talking about after you get to know them and everything, THEN it happens like you explain

but a blonde bombshell walks past you and you go goo goo gah gah over her. then thats silly

 

Stacy of course I mean after I talk to them for a bit. There are a lot of pretty girls I can't stand.

 

My friend is abstinent until marriage and doesn't pursue girls much as anything but friends, either.
He could also be not that interested in such things, more geared towards other things at the moment, picky, or still have his heart left somewhere else.

You remind me of my other friend - he used to get seemingly annoyed by the idea that my friend is a virgin, like "I don't understand this THAT MAKES ME ANGRY" and I always used to get really annoyed by it, like "get off his dick, it's his life".
That's what I suggest to you. Get off his dick. Let him live for himself, not for you and the rest of 'society'.

 

I must take issue with what I highlighted in red...

There's something to be said for desiring stability and happiness alone first before entering into a relationship. Perhaps there's actually something wrong with everyone who absolutely "has" to be in a relationship. Your insistence in figuring out "wtf is wrong with him" smacks of disrespect- which you've either taken pains to hide from this guy friend or he's a saint of a person who's willing to look past your domineering control freak facet that looks at any nonconformity as a sickness, and is willing to accept you as a friend.

The fact that he had family problems might be a clue that he's making sure he's past that so he doesn't bring the baggage into a relationship. Maybe he actually values the concept of a couple so highly that he wants to be sure that he's found the right person before taking any meaningful steps away from staghood. You seem more worried about his sexuality that he apparently is. What is the payoff to you? Does his being single cause you personal injury or embarrassment? What is at the root of your apparent desperation to "fix" what is "wrong with him"?

You call yourself a friend but it seems like you're struggling with your responsibility as a friend to accept this individual as he is. Is the friendship conditional on him being "normal"? If so, do him a favor and break off the friendship.

 

Amen.

 

oh phew lol.

 

maybe he doesnt feel good looking...

 

Just leave him to do what he wants with his life! Hes not hurting anyone and its his business. If you were my friend and you were posting about me on forums because I chose not to have a load of partners Id tell you to fuck off

 

Some people aren't interested in love or sex.

 

that's a weird question
dude probably just doesn't want a girlfriend.
i don't want a boyfriend or girlfriend. there's nothing wrong with me.

 

I dont want a boyfriend. too dramatic. too much hassle. well...some

 

Women have evil manipulative ways and maybe he knows that and avoids them considering most of western society is on the woman's side already.