Polygamists and marriage

If gay people could get married, why not polygamists?

what are your feelings?

 

thats between the spouses. they make swingers clubs just for that. its perfectly legal

 

but that's not marriage.

that's swinging.

if a man has three wives, they aren't actually legally married, all three of them can't be on his health insurance, and the two who aren't legally married to him don't have the same legal protections as the one who is.

 

I think as long as no one is beign taken advantage of, polygamsit marraiges and triangular marraiges are fine.
I couldn't share and don't want to be shared and don't see how a loving man can share his wife if he is truly in love. But, I am sure not everyone feels the same way, so who the hell am I? I might judge them, but I don;t want to take away their rights.
A lot of people probobly think my husband's and my relationship is weird and it is, but who really gives a fuck?

 

Why not? If a man wants to put himself through that nightmare, let him.

 

Could go the other way too.

 

Would they all still have to buy me presents, or would the main husband be the only present giver? Would I have to have sex with all of them? We are a couple with a low sex drive when it comes to each other, so I think it would be non-existent with other people.

 

Tjose plygamist men look greasy and cold. Could you imagine how horrible it would be to have to have sex with them whenever it was 'your turn'. YUCK.

 

Sure, either way, if they want to put themselves through that nightmare, let them. It's tricky enough to satisfy two women at once in bed, satisfying 2+ partners in a marriage sounds near fucking impossible.

 

if it was a social norm you would have normal polygamist guys.


in some cultures (before they were brought civilization) it was normal to have complex marriages, where a man might have multiple wives, who might also have multiple husbands.

which could be very complicated legally speaking.

 

my answer is the same as what i wrote in the gay marriage thread

its not any of my business nor is it the gov't bizness, but they will always get involved

 

how do tax breaks work for polygamist couples?

and welfare?

and jointly filing your tax return?

 

I don't give a rat's fink who marries who. Two men, two women, man and woman...I don't care what their background is. Marriage is a traditional religious ceremony, nothing more. So if you're religious, go right ahead.

 

polygyny is very common when you look at human culture around the world and throughout time.

polyandry is not unheard of, but far less common.

even less common still is a culture which practices both.

the reasons for this are generally pretty obvious (peoples with a culture of ownership almost universally also have some variety of inheritance, as well as issues of lineage tracing, etc.)

i really don't have strong feelings about this. if it were legal, both polygyny and polyandry would have to be legal. i could see this leading to a) extreme confusion in regards to complex marriages described and b) rampant abuse of systemic benefits of marriage (tax breaks, health insurance, etc.) with large "marriages" of multiple people. in such complex marriages involving both polygyny and polyandry simultaneously, it would be difficult to determine lineage of offspring, and in theory every child would be a dependent of every adult in the family.

parent teacher conferences would be weird lol

basically i have no moral objection to it whatsoever and feel it is between the people concerned, however due to the current legal implications of the word "marriage" i am afraid it would be risky at best to adopt a social attitude in favor of such relationships.

i think that for polyamorous people an open relationship or fourth compartment relationship is probably the best relationship structure in modern western society. for those not familiar with this, an open relationship allows for sex and dating outside of the main relationship, but a lot of time is spent with your primary partner discussing the peripheral partners in what's called "processing." this is the old school open relationship now generally out of style due to creating jealousy problems in a lot of individuals. now when people discuss open relationships they more often mean something along the lines of a fourth compartment relationship, which values trust and privacy over personal growth through discussing with your primary partner sexual/romantic issues involving peripheral partners. in a fourth compartment relationship, there is an understanding that there is a particular portion of one's life that is intensely private and not always necessarily the business of even one's main partner. they resist grilling each other over "where have you been? who were you with?" and understand that sometimes other relationships may arise on the side. if this happens, the partner can discuss it if they wish, but are not to be pressured or guilted into discussing it.

however, while both structures offer the possibility of multiple relationships, they primarily do focus around sex with other people, not deeply intimate, long term relationships, such as is the case with marriage.


i really don't know how the issue should be resolved, but not everybody fits into the cookie-cutter version of heterosexual 2 person relationships sanctified through marriage, and not everyone should be expected to. i think that different varieties of relationships (GLBT and all other unorthodox relationships) deserve the same respect and consideration as more usual relationships, but i think there must be a line. obviously an entire crazy cult in a mass marriage shouldn't get health benefits because one of them has a job.

 

Beautifully said Nesta.

 

Polygamy is legal in Utah I believe

 

I bet you didn't even read it, like the rest of us.
You just say that because it is long.

 

I've been thinking about this subject since posting earlier and, to be honest, I can't think of anything better than being surrounded by people I love and who love me. I think I would love being in a polyamorous relationship.

 

I think that people should be able to marry any number of whatever and whoever they want to marry.

 

Fine with me.

More trophy wives!