i'd appreciate a woman's perspective on this(can't discuss w/friends)

Discussion in 'Relationships' started by iloveit, Aug 5, 2009.

  1. iloveit

    iloveit Member

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    my current grlfriend is real fitness enthusiast. she has a dynamite body and is actually known in town for as the hot girl with the great behind.lol.she attracts attention everywhere. i've asked her before if she ever thought of other girls. she said no. says she admires beauty but that's it. but she attracts attention everywhere. she just has a really pronounced arch to her back and so stuff just sticks out i guess. ha.
    she is a fitness fan too. not the overly muscular girls but she is aware of certain competitors and admires their hard work etc. but one of her friends(a woman she met at the gym) recently got a boob job done and my girl has always been curious about getting them(even though i tell her she's perfect and does'nt need them. apparently the other woman said she would show her them because she was curious about it. but joked that my girl would have to show her her behind in exchange. she SAYS it was a joke. I dunno.
    they are both fitness fans and exchange emails etc.
    i feel a little guilty because i was a snoop. well it was right in plain view but still.. i was over my girl's place and she had her computer on and had youtubes of a bunch of bikini contests and a bunch of other topics almost all with "ass" in the title(bikini contests,fitness asses,best butt etc.)
    i feel like a loser. i did'nt go snooping deep into her stuff,it was right there and we use eachother's computers all the time, but i still feel bad.
    anyways, the whole thing IS somewhat of a turn on,definitely. but i'm also a little bummed if maybe she does'nt trust me with sharing a possible attraction to women. she had a big religious upbringing and i know it's supposed to be against her beliefs. could it be completely innocent? i don't wanna bring it up the wrong way. she became slightly annoyed in the past when i broght the subject up before. do i have something to be concerned about if she goes over to look at this woman's breasts?i feel i have very little control here and i'm obviously a little insecure about this. any thoughts?
     
  2. Crayola

    Crayola =)

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    im not sure i got everything right, but from what i got, u seriously have nothing to worry about. all women are insecure about their bodies, and they are gonna look at other women and compare their bodies with other women's. its harmless, and doesnt have anything to do with u really
     
  3. Happiness4Dogs

    Happiness4Dogs Member

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    Jackpot! :cheers2:
     
  4. iloveit

    iloveit Member

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    ok. i appreciate the help. really. thank you. i made the mistake of never confiding in friends about my relationship cuz i guess i was trying to respect the girl but at the same time i'm left to figure it all out on my own so this helps. i'm still weary. this is one of the youtubes .. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K7ovyFSPB9A&feature=related. it's obviously meant to titillate but should i assume my girlfriend is turned on by that? there are a bunch like this.
    after i acted like an idiot(i expressed some jealousy. i'm an idiot) we did'nt really talk about it. my girl passed along that i was uneasy. so the other girl says that i could be there but could'nt watch. they were on te phone for awhile and long story short this girl told her she would let her look and feel for as long as she wanted. she said that the girl was sayying what a big decision it is and she should know how they look in different clothes,bikinis,lingerie and ofcourse topless. she said she would get in whatever position, run in place etc. ... wtf?! after all this i was speechless. it should be a turn on and it is somewhat but i asked my grlfriend if she has toi show her ass and she said the girl said she just wants to see it and squeeze it a little cuz "it's so perfect." my girlfriend wants to do this and has even bought a slingshot g string bikini(something ya can't just wear at the local beach because we could run into a relative or something. i asked if she bought it just for this possible occasiobn and she said "well if i do show my buns i want them to look sexy." wha??? this is all messed up,right? i have reason for concern don't i? she's always attracted attention everywhere. she can't walk down the street in sweatpants and hide her figure. but this definitely has left me insecure.
     
  5. homeschoolmama

    homeschoolmama Senior Member

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    I think the term you're looking for here is "bi curious." It sounds to me as if she's considering exploring girls.

    If I were you, I'd think long & hard about how YOU feel about being with a girl who's considering this - because at least in my opinion, whether it's with another guy OR a girl... she's considering cheating on you. The fact that she's being open & honest about it doesn't really change that fact.

    love,
    mom
     
  6. metalgypsy

    metalgypsy Member

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    I don't really think she's considering cheating on you, but you might want to bring it up. Like "Hey, I was on your computer(checking email, watching videos, etc.) and I found your YouTube page and I was just kinda curious. I'm not going to blab or anything, but you can be honest with me". Something like that. Just do it subtly, cause you don't want her to think you can't trust her. But, can you trust her now that you found all of this?
     
  7. moon_flower

    moon_flower Banned

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    I think she just wants to look at other girls butts to compare to hers. If she's into that fitness-y sort of thing, it's shouldn't surprise you. :)
     
  8. iloveit

    iloveit Member

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    well i asked her last night how she wants this to happen. she asked if we could do it in my pool. so i'm like, she really wants to see your ass. she said yeah. i'm like how are you gonna do it? she said " i thought it would look sexy if i slowly lifted it out of the water." so i'm like ok is this a turn on or what? u gatta see where i'm coming from. she responded that she does get turned on when a hot girl stares at her and the idea that an amazing girl with beautiful breasts is dying to see her naked ass. she said she WOULD be turned on if she squeezes and played with it not because she likes girls but if a girl is so horny for her it makes her feel she is really sexy and that makes her think about sex more so she's turned on. ...hmm
     
  9. iloveit

    iloveit Member

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    i then asked , ok if you could have two girls feeling your butt would you be MORE turned on? she said, "i dunno,..guess so. that would make me feel hotter."
     
  10. Vanilla Gorilla

    Vanilla Gorilla Go Ape

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    If your girlfriend has abs, you are probably both bi
     
  11. forwardventure

    forwardventure Member

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    haha..thanks for the laugh, Vanilla Gorilla.
     
  12. Crayola

    Crayola =)

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    ok so basically your gf gets off from stripping to other girls. what is unclear though is if u're willing to let her do that or not.
    - if u arent and it makes u insecure, then just tell her not to do it, cuz u'd rather she does that only for u. then deal with what she answers. its very possible that u guys arent into the same things, in which case u'll have to make a decision. (i mean, do u love each other?)
    - if u're curious about it and a lil turned on as well, then tell her u wanna watch too.
     
  13. iloveit

    iloveit Member

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    yeah. i told her how i felt and she completely understands.although at first she was very defensive saying she's not bi or bicurious. that does'nt make sense to me considering what is probably gonna take place. we do love eachotherbut there's obviously a ways to go on the communication front. i told her look i'm a guy. the image of you getting hot over presenting your ass to a 19 yr old blonde w/huge boobs is hot. no guy would'nt be hugely turned on. she laughed and said i was definitely right. she said she was turned on by me being turned on and we had some fun together. i'm not pushing her omn analyzing how she feels or what she may like and she is now gonna ask if it's ok if i'm there. i think this COULD be definitely going someplace. she says she thinks the girl won't mind at all. i asked her to wear the slingshot bikini and she said she would if i wanted but asked if i wanted to wait until the night we do this. i agreed to that. the horny factor is easing my insecurity maybe . i dunno.
     
  14. Sweetleaf63

    Sweetleaf63 Senior Member

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    your thinking of it more than you should..
    Alot of girl are like that,especially if they have traits to show;)
    Dont worry it sounds totally innocent.
     
  15. iloveit

    iloveit Member

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    i really think this is a sexual situation. the other girl sent my girl another youtube(my girl showed me) of women's asses https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vFSgUelvFG8&feature=related and picked one out saying " that looks like yours." "i am gonna bite that butt!" "gawd, it's so hot, u bitch!" and asked my girl to find her boobies in a youtube and wants it sent back. i feel better about all this cuz i'm included now. i'm a little nervous about what may happen (now not until this friday)
     
  16. iloveit

    iloveit Member

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    she showed me the one the girl picked out of her butt and asked me"you think that's mine?" when i said yeah pretty much she got visibly turned on. she asked me if i was ok with everything and i said , "i ...think so." i just did'nt even know what to say. where do i start? i don't wanna kill this again or upset her.i told her i was gonna have a raging hard on when this is going on and she said ,"oh i know. i'll be watching for that."
     
  17. vicaryd

    vicaryd Guest

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    I don't think you have nothing to worry about. I am straight and like keep fit but also like looking at other girls bodies even on porn but i am not gay and have never been with a girl. Your girlfriend loves you. don't worry. Dawn.
     
  18. iloveit

    iloveit Member

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    oh man. vicaryd. this is perfect. you sound like the ideal person to ask. i have so many questions though. so when you are at the gym and see a girl with a body like i escribed,real pretty etc. do you sometimes fantasize about them,even though you sound like you would'nt act on it?
    when you watch porn do you care what the girl looks like. like, if you could look in the store do you look for a particular type, big boobs,nice legs, tight ass etc.? is it just that a woman is beautiful and it makes you think of sex or are you actually fantasizing about kissing,squeezing her butt,feeling etc.?
    i know my girlfriend is'nt gay. she actually told me how much she gets turned on by a big cock. she likes the way it looks not just feels. i actually dont know how a woman DOESNT find a girl like this a turn on.
    my girl always works extremely hard on her body and especially that ass of hers but she has been doin' excercises at home as well. and after all this i somehow didnt pick up or realize that if my girl is arching her back and displaying her naked ass to this girl(if she does it anything like she does it for me) she REALLY knows how to work it and if it's naked and she's spreead like that,she's gonna see EVERYTHING else as well.
    could you ever imagine yourself in this sityution if you were approache d the right way? is there any way this does'nt get extremely sexual? do you think most women are probably attracted to women like this(not acting on it but fantasizing)? sorry if that's long. i would NEVERtell anyone i know this stuff. we're keeping it all very quiet. we both have family and good friends that are great people but no way she wants anyone knowing this stuff.if i asked a woman i knew anyways she probably would'nt want to admit certain feelings anyways. any help/perspective is greatly appreciated,REALLY.
     
  19. MissBHave

    MissBHave insert clever phrase here

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    Honestly, at first I agreed with the other posters that she was just comparing but i think you may be right
    The biggest thing here is that you really need to trust your instincts
    The nagging little voice in the back of your head is usually right
    Now does that mean you should be jealous or act like a fool
    No
    Your right, she probably hasn't come to terms with it herself or is afraid to talk about it
    By being confrontational and accusatory you're just going to keep it that
    Just because she may be attracted to women doesn't make her a different person
    It doesn't mean she's going to cheat on you
    Just try to be open minded and supportive
     
  20. iloveit

    iloveit Member

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    thx so much for your advice. misbehave. it really helps me. gatta stay cool! ha. the girl last night(after sending her another youtube of hot girls with nice asses) said to he on the phone that if she was feeling weird about it she could just rub tanning oil on her boobs so it's not like she's just feeling up "some big titties." (riiiight).
    she said ,then i could just do the same sort of thing to your butt..after "i take a bite out of that tight round ass!"
    my girl responded with an "oh my god i cant believe you said that" type thing ."hahahah."
    then the girl said she was just kidiing and she doesnt really have to show her ass. she just said it's so beautiful i was just curious if it looked as good naked. she said she's not bi or anything. then she says, that she should still see her titties and she'll show her in any position and she'll bring some other very sexy outfits,shorts, and other normal clothes to see how everything looks. she says she has an awesome g string bikini that looks amazing and also barely covers her boobs,and she'll bring that for the pool. she asked her if i would promise to be nice if i think she has a fat butt dont be mean or anything. (ridiculous. her butt is good enough for a g string. that's pretty good i'd say). my girl tod her no way, he "agrees your gorgeous." wow.
    my girl says i'm kinda shy about showing you but as long as your "really nice to my butt it will be ok."
    this thing turns me on like crazy now. i doubt anyone would think i'm a jerk here,to say if i'm in that pool and this stuff is going on..i'm gonna be at least fantasizing about getting involved. i have no idea how it would play out. obviously i'm gonna be hard as a rock.it's my pool so it's homecourt advantage at least. ha. any added opinions? i don't dare ask my girl about "her feelings" around all of this at this point. it will just come off as analyzing and put pressure on everything and ruin it. ... right? thankyou to anyone /everyone for help and advice. man, what a turn on though.
     

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