Youre a classy bird, arent you? Seriously you're talking about tacky, yet you're sleeping with a guy just for the hell of it, giving him your knickers and talking about "pulling" people "down town" You had no issue with him taking your knickers. Now you've found out he took other womens knickers you find it creepy. When you sleep with a guy just for the sex and he takes your knickers, you take it for granted he's probably doing exactly the same with other women-why wouldn't he? And why would it matter who these women were? You need to either re-evaluate your actions, or suck it up and accept that these things happen between people who have casual sex (which I'm not condemning btw if thats what you want-just don't complain about who else he sleeps with) You decide-you either have a relationship with a man, or mutually agree not to sleep with others- in which case you have the right to complain if he sleeps with your friends too Or you don't...and you have no such right
You consider my actions tacky well maybe. As for why it matters who the other women he was shagging were well as I said they were his friends and colleagues. There is a lot of casual sex in the army, but it wasn't casual was it, if you go out of the way to shag people you work it ,, well it's not casual. I think a lot of blokes on here are bringing their own predjudices to bear, as for whether I have a right to complain well, I know it's tedious for some men to accept but I actually think I do have a right to complain.
perhaps he dosent just fuck people he can "pull in from downtown". he's sleeping with your colleagues because he is around them, and obviously attraction between them all individually took place. its not all that complicated. he sounds upright enough to me. (not that i know him) but you dont make him sound all that bad. relax.
I am pretty relaxed about it this all happened years ago. I still have a pretty high opinion of the guy, his sexual habits aside he was a really decent guy. I don't want to be too specific but we did a six month tour in afghanistan and when we got back he spent his leave volunteering for a charity. I don't consider myself hung up about it, I just find the situation a bit strange. He could have gone out and pulled any woman he wanted (I know people have struggled with the expression pulled its just the british equivalent of pick up) but instead he wanted to shag women he served with? what's that about?. I know some blokes will apply their own limited views on sexual relations which makes him a stud and us all sluts... but I think in reality it was a little bit more of a grey area than that.
Well firstly I'm not a man Secondly I'm not bringing any prejudice to the conversation. Thirdly, yes, the sex was casual. They were colleagues. How does that mean the sex wasn't casual? Do you not know what non casual sex actually entails?
People have answered your points a LOT of times now, with a lot of possible explanations, all of which made sense
You wonder why he was sleeping with girls at work instead of going downtown to try to pick up some stranger? It's simple they were available to him, and he didn't have to wine and dine them to get laid. No sitting in the bar for hours, buying drinks, and hoping she would go home with him. Hell, just go to work, and get paid while you flirt.... Apparently it worked well for him. Just be glad your knickers are in his trophy drawer, and you aren't part of a video collection.