So, I met this guy. We'll call him Dean. Dean and I met and we are physically attracted to one another. We've been out about 5 times or so, not on "dates" but just hanging out, playing pool, shooting range, etc. I REALLY like him but he has yet to hold my hand, or even kiss me. He does know (from our conversations) that I'm abstinant untill marriage (and NO I'm def NOT a virgin) and he respects that very much. The most he does is playfully poke me, kick me, prod me.....that sort of flirty thing. We were recently at a friend of his house and while he was outside his friend said to me "he LIKES you alot or he wouldn't have brought you here to meet us, trust me he's into you." He suggested I make the first move but I won't because I don't want to be rejected or make akward what is atleast a good friendship. Now I know some guys are reserved, as dean is....but if he had some feelings for me and wanted to advance slowly as I would, would he not have atleast tried to hold my hand or kiss me by now? I should also mention we don't talk on the phone unless it's me calling him or him calling me to go somewhere. We both don't like long phone conversations but he doesn't call to even say "Hey, whats up?" I dunno.....whatta you guys think? I should also mention this guy is over 30.
nah chika it could be a million different things, he could really like you but be confused, unsure, anxious, depressed, have low self-esteem, you make him nervous, hes not sure what he wants to do with you, etc. Dont be one of those chicks who makes the guy do all the relationship advances. If you want him to hold your hand, grab his effing hand one day and squeeze it and hold it for a while. see what happens. play with this!
His self esteem might be low. Next time you see his freinds, ask them when he was last with a woman or had a girlfreind. You could ask him, but it might come across the wrong way, or he might lie about it. I dont know any guy that doesnt like when a girl takes control, and initiates the first move. He might just be "fridget" as we used to say in grade 7 lol.
Thanks for the replies I was the last one to call him to go out so I'm waiting on him to make the next move and call me....but I just might take that advice and muster up the courage to grab his hand.
Sounds like a lack of communication to me. You can't make him talk, but you can make yourself talk. So you need to go out on a limb and state your intentions. You guys are not teenagers, you both should know the game/score. Just hold is hand if needed. It does concern me that phone conversations are limited in everyday- just a thought.
probably likes you but is hesitant cuz you won't give up the vaginal intercourse. that might work when you're 16, but dude is 30 yrs old. no grown man is going to wait until marriage to see if that thing stinks or not
Fridget is the right word here, read six lines and has typical childish flirting. He likes you - just he doesn't have the correct means of expressing it. If he is 30 and pokes you? :S That seems a little odd. Everyone now and then to refer to childish flirting yes, but all the time? Don't bother.
well, he called last week to hang out and I missed his call. He's been sick. but yeah, he's kinda lame. That's my problem. All the nice guys (he really respects my celebacy) bore me and all the bad boys who want the one night stand are way more aggressive and fun. But I've had enough of that to last a while and I'm sick of it. We'll see if he calls again....I like to leave the ball in his court I guess. Making the first moves are not really my style. Guess I've never had to. But yeah, lame lame lame. I'm kinda over it.
the most important thing is friend compatibility. If you guys have great conversations, the phone thing is w/e. he just probably doesnt like phone that much. But if you like the phone, call him. cuz you know that he likes you. I would advance at the best part of the time you're visiting him when conversation is flowing best and you two are having the most fun. It makes the notion of advance more genuine.
