So, Ive been "underdressing" for some time now. I would say that the first time i did this I was about 12. Back then I never would in public. Just sort of, stuck to my room and would almost exclusively masturbate while underdressing. Since then Ive gone through phases where I would throw out all of my women's underwear to try and stop. I usually regret this or eventually acquire more. Anyways, this past year Ive started sortof accepting this into my life. The thing is, I dont consider myself a crossdresser at all because Im not trying to identify as a woman. I mean Ive worn a full set of womens clothes before but I think of it as more of a fetish than anything. I wear womens thongs mostly. Ive been doing it for a couple of reasons, one... because I feel like it. I wear skinny jeans and its impossible for me to wear boxers like I normally do. I sometimes wear women's jeans too because they fit properly. This doesnt leave much room for underwear at all and a thong gives support and is discrete. Anyways, the whole point to this is that Ive been re-thinking this whole thing, as I have been doing from the start. I am dating a girl at the moment, and weve been together, off and on, for over a year now. So before I started doing this as often as I do now. I have all of my thongs hidden in my room because for the past 4 months shes basically been staying with me (were both in college). There has been a couple instances already where Ive left one out or one would fall out of my pockets and she would find these. Both instances ive been able to come up with convincing reasons why these would be in my room. I want to tell her about this. I just get the feeling that if I didnt have to hide it then i would be a lot less stressed. Whenever im changing I have to make sure she cant see anything or if were going to have sex I have to run to the bathroom to take it off. Shes not conservative or anything. I mean she used to consider herself a lesbian/bisexual before we got together anyways. Its just, I know shes going to be creeped out because ive kindof tried hinting and she had a really bad reaction. Do you guys have any suggestions? Anyone going through the same thing?
The only suggestion I can offer you is to explore the drive behind this behavior. If its what you like then so be it but after reading your post it feels like you attempted to justify wearing a woman's thong because of comfort and practicality and I feel like that is not true. The behavior also puts you in a sticky situation with your girl, yet still you are compelled to continue the behavior over something so trivial as underwear, you could just go commando. It just seems to me that there is an underlying issue here that you may want to consider giving your attention. Accept yourself for who you are.
Dude it sounds like you aren't even accepting yourself. I'd be seeing that as more worrisome than her not accepting you. Stop trying to justify something that doesn't need to be justified. If this is something you want in your life, square with it, and bite the bullet. If she isn't okay with you being yourself, you need to find someone who will be. If it's meant to be, she'll accept you, quirks and all.
