just a few questions which are playing on my mind

hey all hope all is well, being struggling qwith this with a while now, as u may well know i am with a girl and like being with her sexually, and hope i do anyhow, i mean i relieve myself to staright porn, and sometimes go on the gay sites just to have a little glimpse of stuff but never actually relieve myself to it because i find that it doesnt do anything for me after a while.

As gross as you gay guys may find it i like the look of a pussy, but still have this urge to look at cock.

What seems to be my problem and have this for many of years now, is the constant thought everyday of having sex with men, somedays have being the lowest of my life but have being in therapy with it all and being on medication etc, and whats called CBT. so the thoughts started out not for me and they became obbsessive thoughts like intrusive stuff i was unable to control due to me being diagnosed with OCD.

Anyway back to the important stuff on why i am really here, just want a few questions answering first.

when a guy meaning you all this is aimed at bisexual people aswell, see a man what do they feel inside what is it they exactly feel in there head and heart?

when you see mens genitalia is it something that you think wow that is hot?

with the women genitalia is it something that turns you off?

when coming to term with who you are, and u realised you were gay, what was the difference in thoughtsd and feelings for men over women? a deep description would be nice.

so basically to conclude i have being having these thoughts for years now, and they dont seem to gross me out anymore like they use, and have even contanplated going with a man just to see but think just too scared to be honest. But for some reason the whole seeing a man getting penetrated seeems to really build my curiousty up and want to know what it feels like

I know you will all be probably thinking well these are stupid questions but they would really help me

Hope to hear from you all soon and have a merry xmas

 

Hi UKPP,

You have a lot of questions and I'm gonna try to answer them all for you as best I can, so let me know if you want me to expound upon one of my answers later or if I wasn't clear enough for you in some respect.

First off, "What do you feel inside your head and heart?" I'm assuming you mean to someone I find emotionally and physically attractive, not just one or the other. So what do I feel for a guy who has the whole package (pun not intended)? Well, It's like this urge, or a longing, I want to be close to him. Physically close to him. I want to touch him and have him touch me back, not just in a sexual way if this guy's the real deal. You also get this kinda nervous excitement, and especially if your unsure of how the other guy feels. Because if I have these feelings and they're reciprocated, it's the greatest sense of comfort and happiness in the world to simply be physically close to someone you love.

"When you see men's genitalia is it something you think 'Wow, that's hot?'"
Yes. There is an unexplainable attraction to me and another man physically. I want him. Bad. To put it crassly, seeing a hot guy naked gets me sprung.

"When you see a woman's genitalia is it something that turn's you off?"
God yes, Vagina's are icky! I don't know why but when I see a woman's neener I get scared in a bad way. It's like this dark, voluptuous cave of evil. And all those flaps! What the hell are they for? Are you supposed to hold on to them? Are they there just for decoration? What the hell!?! And then they bleed once a month, and they have all sorts of discharges. And babies come from there. Seriously, who thought of all this? Girls are gross...

"What were the differences in thoughts and feelings for men and women after you realized you were gay?"
Well, before I came out I had a few relationships with women. None of them were particularly satisfying. I have had plenty of deep, emotionally relationships with women, and for many years some of my best friends were women, but the drive to take it further was never there. When I kissed any of them who made a move, it was like there was no blood going to it. I didn't necessarily hate it, but it just seemed to lack some excitement, or passion, or something that I knew a kiss was supposed to have. I've sortof known I was gay since I was 12 but my fears about sexuality forced me to commit to trying to change myself. i hated that I was gay, for the simple reason that I thought God hated me cause I was gay. So I tried to engage in relationships to force me back, or so I thought. But as I've said, nothing worked. So By the time I was a sophomore in college I decided that I was going to come out. First only to my closest friends, but later to more people, some of whom i wouldn't consider ever that close. And thier reactions encouraged me. i can't really date while I'm at school because It's illegal to be gay here and they would expel me if I was open about it. So I'm waiting till I graduate to be honest with everyone. But my feelings for men have never particularly changed and they won't change when I become fully open. I've always found certain men sexually appealing and I have always had this desire to be close to them in a way i never wanted with girls. The only thing that truly changed was how much I let myself be demonstrative with my affections, not the affections themselves.

Talking about it made it real for me. And if your questioning your sexuality you should see where it takes you. Be open with other people, and find out how deep your urges are. Sexuality is not black and white. There are numerous theorists how have settled on scales of sexuality. I'm fully gay. There is no part of me that wishes to be intimate with a woman. But maybe your not. So what? Enjoy yourself and don't apologize for it, and let yourself be free to whatever your identity may be. Don't be scared of who you are, there's not much you can do about it. Let other people be the ones to worry. As one of the most insightful authors of all time succinctly put it:

"Be who you are and say what you feel. Because those that mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind."
-Theodor Geisel (Dr. Seuss)

Happy Christmas UKPP


p.s. Let me know if you have anymore questions!

 

when i see an attractive man i feel what i assume heterosexual men feel when they see an attractive woman (reports tend to agree) -- i feel a pull. it's hard to put it in words exactly. a lot of it is a sexual attraction. but once i get to know a guy better (sometimes before that) it's also a pull for friendship or a recognition of congeniality. i've always been better friends with men than women, so there's also a dimension of friendship to it. just an urge to be with a man.

i connect with men. i do get along well with women too, but there isn't that intensity there that is with guys.

yeah, cocks are hot. and i love to do just about anything with and to them -- suck, fuck, touch, lick, deepthroat, etc. the whole body of a man is hot -- ass, abs, arms, back, legs, etc. men are goddamn beautiful.

yes, female genitalia is a turn off. the whole female form is a turn-off.

with women it never went beyond the level of friendship, with men it did. i never wanted to hold a woman or touch her, let alone do anything even more intimate with her. i did have these urges for men. things that were disgusting and gross with women, felt beautiful and natural with men.

i had fantasies that were erotic in nature already at the age of 5 (of course, i didn't know what it all meant back then) and they were always about guys. so i knew from very early on that i liked men. and luckily i never had to come to terms with it, since i never went through a phase of doubt or guilt about liking guys.

i love men. they're beautiful, exciting, amazing. i love the company of men, their looks, personalities, everything.

 

Merry Christmas

KD

 

I never look at a guy and think omg he's the one (sex or relationship wise), I get to know him if I like how he's acting

When I look at a mans penis, I think it's beautiful, I don't go nuts over it.

I thought of a man more to be my partner after I came to terms with being gay. Girls just seemed like better friends.

A girls turns me on aswell, but I don't go down that road many times, now.

Hope this helps. I like both sexes, btw.

 

thankyou for all your posts they were very helpful and very mature answers which i was happy about.

I mean to be honest many staright men will tell you the same that periods and discharges are pretty grosss from a female so gay men aint the only ones in the same boat. but the thought of discharge from a male and suckign his cock, also rimming doesnt really do anything for me in fact it seems to make me lift my lip up a bit, and that isnt to say i think that gay men are gross for doing it, because thats what some gfay men like and some may not, i am just offering my opnion thats all

As i have grown up i have alwsy being with women because i have always found them attractive to me on a sexuall level and emoptional level aswell. i am with a girl now and really do like her alot even tho i aint really good with my feelings of telling her that.

i mean my favourite with a girl is oral sex i love pleasing that female i am with,

but with me its seeing the girl getting penetrated and me then thinking well if women can do anal sex and enjoy it why i cant i have a cock up me and enjoy it aswell, i dont know this has being happenign for a long time now, it seems to be like the curiousty of knowing what it feels like has really gotten real intense in my head and become and obbession i hope you all understand.

Once again thankyou for taking your time to listen and have a merry xmas