'I like older guys'

This is more or less just a general rant about some stupid shit I hear a lot of younger girls saying.

We've probably all heard girls (usually between about 17 and 23) saying they 'like older guys,' their reasons usually being that older guys are more mature and/or sexually experienced. Can't really argue with that. Although there are a lot of older people who are very immature, I'll be charitable and assume they're talking about older guys who actually are mature.

Now this wouldn't be an issue if the girls saying it were a little more mature themselves: a lot of younger guys are immature idiots. What gets me is that these girls aren't mature. I've lost count of how many times I've heard this coming from very spoiled, stupid, immature girls. They've been brought up on all this 'girls mature faster than guys' shit, and now they think they're ready to bag a 40-year-old. It seems a little arrogant to me that they assume any 40-year-old guy would want to be with them. There's an immense mental difference between a nineteen-year-old and a 40-year-old. What guy with a career and a life wants to date a girl barely out of high school? It makes no sense to me. That kind of thing could work if the girl was actually mature; the problem is they're not. This shit just makes me laugh.

And before any girls who like older guys get offended, I'm talking about a certain kind of girl: specifically the bitchy kind who thinks she's too mature for guys her age. This is not directed at every girl who's interested in older men.

 

well damn zorba... I was going to make some cracks in here, but you ruined it by being reasonable... lol

There are some women that are more mature at 18 then a lot of them ever will be, but they are rare. Of course, you have to keep in mind, that there are a lot of both sexes that make it to old age, without ever maturing...

I am curious about one thing though... if these girls are very spoiled, stupid and immature, exactly what was it you said to them that would make them respond in such a fashion?

You didn't ask them out did you?

lol

 

Ha, no. This isn't something that (very many) girls have said to me, but more something I've overheard. The few who have said it to me haven't said it in response to any advances I've made, but just in general discussion about relationships.

 

How often is it that you meet anyone who truly knows what it is they want?

 

i think it's because those mean, immature young women you are talking about are looking for something that doesn't remind them of their own nature.. i.e. their opposite in more than one way. this is discussed a lot in psychology of relationships.

 

And what man doesn't like torturing himself?

 

Zorba, couldn't agree more and yet mind less.

Granted they can be annoying drama bag's, but then ya' just have to mentally turn them into something akin to the lamp in the corner when it gets unbearable, you don't notice it too much, just appreciate it's presence in an otherwise dark room.

And of course I'm not saying that all younger ladies who look for older men are dilly drama bag's, there's plenty who are more of a centerpiece like the TV than they are a utilitarian table lamp. :cheers2:

 

I've dated young women with this philosophy of thinking Zorba is explaining. Yes 19 year old's are very young and naive, many times I've had to break it off with them due to their fickleness.

Young ladies don't understand what they want, when they say they want an older guy who is fun to be with, in reality they are looking for someone who can control situations.

Though many are mainly looking for security specially when they have been out in the real world and can't hack it. In the end a large percentage of young ladies that are in relationships which differ 8 years or more will not stay committed.

Which is odd since when the rolls are reversed it's very much the opposite of a uncommitted affair.

 

Personally, I do find myself attracted to older men (early 30s mostly) and I'm only 19. I find them overall attractive, mature, and I like that they know what they want (more or less) by that age. Yet, I have to agree with RustOldBattleAxe, I am probably interested in the security and control these men would have over me. It feels safe in that way. However, I don't feel that I am one of the women that would not stay committed. I'm only in a relationship for the commitment and pleasure of someone to grow with.

 

True, but can you really grow with someone who's that much older than you? They've already dealt with everything you typically have to deal with at your age and have grown past it.

 

just to be clear....I[older guy]dont want to have stimulating conversation with girls half my age...i want to bang them....period....
end of story

edit..i have stolen a few from dudes like you zorba

 

It goes both ways, girls like older guys, but guys like younger girls, it's not just maturity or life situation, both genders generally feel more comfortable that way, it's how it's been for thousands of years. Blame it on looks, women like their men to look old(well not old, just adult and mature) while men like their women to look as young as possible.

 

Most girls, and indeed, most people, are sure they're leaps and bounds more mature than the rest of the world.

Now I'm sure I'm an awful hypocrite saying this, because, honestly, I feel exactly that way about most girls my age.... They're fucking stupid and immature. But this doesn't mean I'd prefer older women, because most people DON'T mature much past this age, they think they do but they really don't change. If they're not mature enough for me from the get-go, I can't imagine they ever would be, age and mental "maturity" are really not that linked, past pretty much 10th grade.... in my personal (and oh so modest) opinion.

 

Maturity level doesn't matter much when a 19 year old is on her back,legs spread and waiting for your next move.

 

i have started liking older guys right when I "became a woman" when i was 14, I liked the 18 yr olds, when I was 16, I liked 20. Now Im almost 20, I like 25. I get along with most of them rather than guys my age, they bitch and complain, ones I know and its annoying. Older explains what exactly they want, understands you, understands the basics of how rotten people can be, and with older, you figure them out quicker,

I have a feeling this is no stage for me. I believe the older I get, the older the men i like get

 

I agree. I'd rather find someone roughly my age who actually is mature than go looking for someone much older. Although, I guess some people here consider 5 or so years to be 'older,' which I don't. I'd easily date anyone younger than 25 or so, and could probably be persuaded to date someone older as long as they were under 30. But again, this isn't what I'm looking for specifically. Within a few years of me (mostly older) is the ideal.

 

i suppose at 20..a 25 year old seems older but a 50 and 55 year old are close enough in age that its normal...i agree with zorba ...5 years does not an older man make...i would say a minimum of a 10 year difference before you can claim ''older''...

 

Well, I feel perfectly fine claiming to be an 'older guy' in these terms.

I've never had any age preference when it comes to women. I've been with women who were twice my age, to women who were 15 or 16 years younger then me. Now and for the last 6 years, I've been with Nicole who is 14 years younger then me.

Physical age (assuming adulthood), is irrelevant. At 18 (when Nicole and I started going out), she was by far more mature then the woman I was in a relationship previously who was 41. The conversations we have are definitely by far better in substance and meaning then any I have had in my life.

Now, having said that, the majority of people (in our culture anyway) have little concept of age vs maturity til after they hit their 20's. The reason I say this is because for the majority of people, they spend almost all of their time before that age, surrounded only by people within a year or two of their own age, due to the fact that our school systems are set up that way.

Once they hit post secondary school, they start having experiences with people who are out of their 'normal' age group. Once they get into the work force, they will usually find themselves in a mix of ages from their own right up to retirement age.

For those who are still locked into the age=maturity level, stop trapping yourself in that box, and get out and experience people. Letting irrelevant factors such as age, hair color, ethnicity, etc, limit who you look at in terms of being a good partner or friend, is just plain silly.

Get to know people for who they are, instead of putting your perceptional boxes around them.

 

Perhaps, Zorba. But people go through events and learn things at different stages. I'm sure that I have gone through things that some older people haven't, and I'm also sure that some older men would be willing to be with someone and help them through things that they've been through and can add perspective. I don't believe older people are as stable as we would like to think at our age. Everyone continuously grows, so yes, I do believe that growing together (despite the age difference) is quite possible.

 

Fuck, I don't assume older people are more stable. I know some fucked up ones... But my point stands. If the older guy is truly as mature as assumed, he's probably got a pretty good head start in terms of personal growth.