I've don't have a psychologist because I can't afford one. I wish I could though. I have bad anxiety, especially social anxiety, panic attacks, etc.. I had a particularly bad upbringing that has caused me to be so cold and bitter to the point that I wonder if I am a sociopath or if I have narcissistic personality disorder. I'm mostly a nice person but I can turn into a real asshole within seconds, especially towards the people I love most. I suppose it doesn't help that I'm living with my mother right now while I attend classes and she is the main reason I've become such a bitter person. I always feel 10x better when I'm not living with her. Advice? Do you think it's best if I move out asap? Look into a way of seeing a psychologist? Move back to the mountains and try to heal? I can't help but think all of this is caused by my upbringing and by having my heartbroken repeatedly. I love someone so much right now and I don't want to hurt him by being an asshole. :\
You are to be commended for putting yourself "out there" in this way. I am not a psychologist, nor do I play one on TV, but reading your post, I am thinking that getting away from your mother sounds like a very good idea, especially as you feel she is, in an indirect way, hurting your relationship with someone. A job, any job that enables you to be on your own would probably be a good thing. I seriously doubt that you are truly narcissistic. Someone with that type of personality probably wouldn't care if she was, so your concern seems to mean that you are not. (I hope that made sense - it did to me). Reading some of your other posts, you seem like a nice and cool person, certainly not a sociopath. Good luck to you.
I don't know. I live in Canada and I've looked into it and it seems the only way is to pay out of your pocket for a psychologist.
I believe that you need to figure out how to do what will make you feel best. In your heart, the answer is dwelling. The most important thing is to remember that it is NOT your fault and that you will recover. That understanding alone helps immensely for me and I hope it does for you too. Sending you warm, fuzzy thoughts. <3
Start by checking here: http://www.cmha.ca/bins/index.asp You can locate a facility and services near you here: http://www.cmha.ca/bins/loc_page.asp?cid=58-85&lang=1 There are usually free or low cost services available, it's just a matter of finding them. Good luck!
