A/N: An obvious shout out to Jimi Hendrix. Red House is one of my absolute favorite songs. He sings it just perfect. (I could on for hours about how much I love him) Reverberating needles and joints like wires and wine pin pricks in my heady heart they say that red house over yonder is filled with a ghost who sings the blues like no body's business your voice is dry dry like that wine that you bought when you were broke and thirsty thirstier than you've ever been before when that hollow man played his bass and sang through his teeth I thought I might cry but you held on to me just the way you're doing now saying, baby baby that's why we moan on that stage so maybe dry wine and dry cries ain't all that bad and maybe we'll be all right staying up nights playing keys on backs and beds holding hands
Very great work, Tyedye! I love the way this flows. Red House is one of my absolute fave Jimi numbers, so that's awesome that it inspired you to write this. One or two suggestions, though, if you don't mind. In this part: "filled with a ghost who sings the blues like no body's business" I'd leave out "like nobody's business." Just sounds better in my head without it. Same goes for: "you were broke and thirsty thirstier than you've ever been before" I'd leave out the first thirsty and just make it "you were broke and thirstier than you've ever been before." When I read it in my head, it flows much nicer and is a bit more tidy with those two little bits left out. Other than that, this piece is so wonderful and I can just groove to it so much. Especially because, like I said, I also love Red House.
OH! Also! These two are my favourite parts: "like wires and wine pin pricks in my heady heart" I love the wording, and for some reason "heady heart" just struck me in a really great way. And I know the exact feeling, and you worded it so well. Also: "and maybe we'll be all right staying up nights playing keys on backs and beds holding hands " I can't say much about this except...fuck...yeah. Haha. Just sounds like such a great way to spend life. I love it.
thanks for you tips and encouragement Glad you liked it. Those two parts were also my favorites. haha
