This is really tough for me to tell anyone, im 16, 17 in about a month or so. Anyways, my boyfriend of 4 months and a half and I have decided to take the relationship a step further and have him finger me. The thing is when he started to do it, it really hurt and i began crying. I am a huge virgin, like 100% virgin. How do i get over this so it doesn't hurt as much? I really like this guy.
Maybe you should start masturbating... You probably have smaller fingers then him. I hope. And don't let him stick more then one finger in you if it hurts! Regulate girl!
Have you ever fingered yourself, or was him doing it your first time ever. Ease comes with repetition. Try doing it to yourself a few times. Wow, 4 months and you havent done anything seriously sexual? You are very virtuous...
he should wait until you are well lubricated..either by getting turned out and becoming wet or using some lube to help. it's nothing to worry about or be ashamed of so don't worry have you fingered yourself before?
Maybe you aren't in the mood? You need to be in the mood.... And nothing should be forced... Cause that's a double turn off. Watch porn. Get horny, and have sex with yourself.
I am, I come from a strict Ukrainian family, and so does he. But I guess it depends on how you were brought up and all.
show him where your clit is... and tell him to get at your clit with his tongue. the way i see it... you already have a way that gets you off. no need to rush into penetration if all you're gonna be doing is mutual masturbation. fingering is like middle school shit compared to cunnilingus, in my opinion. also, its gonna hurt your first time... unless your a horseback rider, gymnast, ballerina, or motocross enthusiast or some other shit.
Use lube, wether it is natural or not, and yes try to masturbate a little, it gets easier, maybe have him do cunnilingus instead, possibilites are endless.
Glad someone finally mentioned the tongue! For Xsake, use it! Over and over again. Use it until the vaginal lips are loose and ready for a step up. You will enjoy immensely. No one ever said, "it hurts!" from a guy using his tongue. It slides in without any friction, it goes up or down, it finds the clit and gently raises the temperature in the room. The sex gods made the tongue to introduce all boys and girls to the pleasures of sex. The one big mistake possible you (the woman) could make, being expected to work him over until your own hesitations are worked out. He always has his hand, and us guys are supposed to be 'understanding!'
Sorry, I was busy raking leaves or I'd have been on it. :cheers2: Ooops, guess I'd missed this one alltogether.
OK let's go down through all the possible issues. Before we get to lubrication issues lets start with his hands. Are his fingernails trimmed, cleaned and filed? Are his cuticles healthy? Does he have hangnails? I've also worked/lived with Russians and Ukranians and understand the macho thing and nail care seems like a very effiminate thing. I'm a 34 year old male with lots of female friends so I'm passing along some of their wisdom and my own common sense. Alot of the women I've known who didn't like to be fingered were done by Macho assholes. Think about the fingernail issue for a second. Do you really want to be scratched on the inside of your Vaj? I didn't think so. Look at his fingers/nails are the ends of his nails too long or are they short and naturally contoured to his fingertips short and contured is better because it is less likely to get caught on sencitive spots this is also why strong cuticles, filed nails, and lack of hangnails are important. Also this relates to clean fingernails. short fingernails usually have less funk under them. Trust me for the most part you don't want the funk under his fingernails inside you. OK now a homework assignment for you: Find your G-Spot. I've been with enough women that I can usually find the G-Spot on the first try. I'll try to describe it without a diagram. Reach all the way inside with your middle finger (everything I've described in the last paragraph on hygene applies to you also). When you get your finger all the way in bend it slightly until you feel a slight ridge in the roof of your vagina. Once you find it rub it with your fingertip using a come here like gesture. now you can teach him how to do it. Lube/Mood issue. Spit makes a pretty good lube for this and it sets up a very sensual mood if you do this. Take his hand and bring his finger into your mouth and suck on it slow and sensually like giving him a blow job. This serves three purposes. First you have more nerve endings in your mouth than in your sex organs so it can start to stimulate and prepare you for the next event. Second men are very visual so seeing something phallic going into your mouth will turn him on. Third you are getting his finger wet and ready to go into you. If you are freaked out about spit going inside you think about it like this if he was going to eat you out you would be getting his spit inside you. Also I hate to seem like an asshole but since you're only 17 don't expect this relationship to last forever. But if you and he follow these basic guidelines they are the basics to build your entire sex life after this. Peace Out Rev J
