How long dating before having sex?!

How long do you think you should date before having sex?

 

I don't really think it's the kind of thing there should be anything set in stone for and folk's should just play it by ear. I mean if having Sex too early in a relationship is going to be enough to derail it's chances of developing into something bigger then perhaps the faulting party involved wasn't really mature enough or just not ready for said relationship in the first place.

I guess I'm just saying if someone's going to get all weirded out over having sex, perhaps they shouldn't be having it in the first place,,, but then I guess that becomes more an issue of hindsight... So if you really have to ask the question, then perhaps you should wait some more?

:cheers2:

 

It's a complicated mathematical formula based on how attractive the girl is and whether or not I'm involved somehow.

 

If you're serious about the relationship, wait a while: I'd say about a couple weeks (if you've had sex in a previous relationship). If you haven't had sex: wait a couple months.

If you're not serious: who cares? It's all about the sex anyway

But that's just me, of course

 

At least a few months if you're young and serious about it working out.

But really, there's no answer to this in any general sense.

Mainly, it depends on how good you are at getting to know other people, criticizing potential mates, and controlling your emotions.

 

Sex only has the emotional attachment that you supply to it. The act can be done with a complete stranger if you take proper percautions.

If you mean it in terms of your relationship, that depends on your relationship, which nobody else can know but you.

In general though, if you are a virgin then wait until you are comfortable, whether that is 1 day or 10 years. If the person you are with actually cares about you, it won't matter how long it takes (although that likely wont stop them from trying).

If you aren't a virgin though, then just go for it (with proper protection of course). Sex is literally the most natural thing in the world. It's free and fun...

As said FritzDaKatx2 said, if sex too early is going to ruin the relationship, it is likely going to happen anyway...

 

I disagree.
In some cases, this may be true - but in a broad sense, no way. As you said, depending on the people and the context of the relationship sex can be just sex. But I don't think this statement takes into account the cases where sex isnt just sex.
To many, sex is a form of commitment, just like engagement or marriage.

I have known many relationships to be hurt by the pressures of commitment, whether it be sex, engagement, or marriage - where things were cooled down for a while (a period of abstinence, a break in the engagement, or a temporary separation) and the relationship turned out fine in the end, or got it's shelf life renewed.

 

That was actually the point of;

This is a choice people make. It is also a choice that leads people to using sex as a method of control in a relationship. To me anyway, that emotional attachment in connection to sex, leads to most of the problems our society has in regards to sexuality.

We shouldn't 'hold back' sex, either from ourselves or a partner, we should gleefully share it.

The first part... sex is not a pressure of commitment, unless you choose it to be that way.

That 'shelf life' part is what I really disagree with.

Withholding sex will only delay the inevitable if there is a problem in the the relationship that would benefit by a 'cooling off period'.

 

Two hours. If the guy is no good at sex, I don't want to waste my time getting to know him better.

 

^lol

 

That doesn't hold up to how people biologically work though. Some people, sure - but there are a slew of hormones (oxytocin for instance) very involved in emotion that are released during sex (particularly in women).

It's the same with monogamy and sexual preference - for some people it is a choice, other times, it's pure biology.

 

I don't think I've ever gone on a date.

My wife and I met at work, had lunch together a few times at a diner and I moved in with her.

Jim and I met at a diner in the French Quarter where he was working. He served me food and we talked. Don't think that was a date. Within a week we were living together.

Oh, wait. I met a guy at the nude beach - he took me to a restaurant for dinner and paid for the meal. I think that was as a date. If so, we had sex about an hour later.

 

Apparently I dont understand what you mean by biology...

 

There are certain hormones and neurotransmitters that are more active and stronger in some people than others. A good example of this is the recently discovered "monogamy" hormone, which leads to strong feelings of devotion during sex, and even blocks the receptors for sex related hormones when the person isn't around.

Random article about it cause the one I read before wasn't in Google's top results anymore =(
http://www.newscientist.com/article/dn14641-monogamy-gene-found-in-people.html

 

I just dont know what to say to that duck.

I didnt see any biological proofs in that article.

I saw theories and interpretation of data from a different study of peoples public lives.

 

4 1/2 years

 

Well, I think that maybe 1 month would be ok.
Less than that is not enough and more than that just turns crazy. lol

 

=S
I don't even know what to think about this post - so... *shrug*

 

Just enough time for dinner and drinks, how convenient! Where were you when I was in the dating pool, LOL?

 

I have to know how they are in bed before dating them.. But I'm happily married now I used him as my boy toy for 2 years before I agreed to go out with him.