Girlfriend doesn't come

Hello everyone,

I have great relationship with my girlfriend. We are both really happy and the sex is just amazing. Only thing is, i just found out that she actually never came, not even in foreplay. She also told me she never had an orgasm with her ex.

She tells me it always feels reallly good, she gets really wet and stuff, and she really likes it intensly(the scars of her nails on my back can prove it), but when she is about to come, and she is almost on on that moment, she says that it suddenly goes away.. She is really upset about it because she really wants to come and she keeps telling me that it's something with her self, and that im doing it perfectly.

The way I let her enjoy is playing with my finger by her G-spot, with the ''come here'' sign with my fingers. I always start slowly and then charge up the speed, and some other variations by the G-spot.
She doesn't really like oral, it doesn't get her really excited and she doesn't really like the idee of my licking there(told her many times that i actually like it but she just dislikes it).
Clitoris isn't an option, because it's oversensitive. When ever i touch it for like 5 seconds, she pulls my hand away.

So does anyone know what the problem is? I really want her to come and she wants it too. I already told her to relax, use imagination, try to flex some muscles there etc. Do any girls or guys have tips for this?
I would appreciate!

 

If she hasn't come yet, there may be a chance that she is incapable. Some woman, as far as I know, just can't.

But if this helps, I also find a finger on my clit, WAY too sensitive, try using your tongue, but very slowly.

 

Maybe she has unresolved issues from the past around sex? It might help if she went to a sex therapist. There might even be something sub-conciously stopping her from orgasming. It's quite common...

You could also try investing in some sex toys and see if she enjoys using them on herself...?

It's true that some women don't have them though....

 

just keep practicing dude.. =] sometimes if you pamper/tease a girl for a reaaaally long time (massage, hot tub/shower, porn, etc) it can help loosen her up enough to have her first orgasm. just try a lot of different things, you'll know when she likes something. and hell maybe try a vibrator/vibrating cock ring. girl on top tends to work best for a lot of girls. or just tease around her clit while you guys are going at it.

 

Only about 25% of females can orgasm from intercourse alone, and another 25% or so can orgasm from intercourse and clitoral massage together. Another 25% can orgasm only from masturbation (clitoris and/or G Spot). And about 20% seldom or never orgasm.

Try giving her G Spot massage to orgasm, while she masturbates her Clitoris the way sh likes it. You may not be doing it long enough to bring her to orgasm - try it for 15 minutes or so, and communicate regularly when you are doing it, to make sure you have the right place and technique for the G Spot.

----the G Spot Master

 

:cheers2:

And don't be afraid of her butt hole either, some like a little tickle now and then

 

Butt secks and clitoral stimulation,, try it.

 

I was thinkin more like a lubed Pinkie finger when she was getting to that " that feels too good" point, but hey if it curls her toes, theres worse sex than butt sex,,, I cant quite think of what that might exactly be at the moment but I'm sure I'll think of something given time.

 

Many ladies can't come from G-spot stimulation alone. It took me a looong time to "learn" to come from actual intercourse. It's always a team effort, I can never just sit back and let my man do all the work or it won't happen (even oral).. got to make sure I'm in the right spot at the right time, hips at the right angle, the right amount of grindage, etc.. it's all very complicated hahaha but I'll shut up before TMI...

The issue with the clit being overly sensitive.. oh man, I forget where I heard it, but it's soooo true. The clit is like a little bald man in a boat. If you want to get him excited, you have to "rock" the boat, not rub him directly on his sensitive bald head... if you can understand that..

Hahaha.. I don't know.. it's all about knowing how your body works and what it responds to. Try encouraging her to masturbate more so she can get to know her "sweet spots". Don't give up, and HAVE FUN reaching your goal.. good luck!

 

Oh please, continue,,,

 

Well, you see, it's quite a scientific process.. I must first calculate the trajectory of the hypotenuse in conjunction with the integral distortion concerning the dilution of the spectrophotometer while standing on my head...

hehehe

 

Just be sure you're using a quality Fresnel lens while calibrating your spectrophotometer or you may just get a cock in your ear!! :cheers2:

 

lmfao

 

Thanks for all the reactions/help.

To start with, butt sex or intercourse is not gonna work, since she founds that ''dirty'' in a negative way.

And for the people saying that i should try different things: It's not possible, only thing she really likes is G-spot there. One new update is that she is getting used to licking, so i need to invest in my licking skills, but how ever, she still found the G-spot better.

I also found out that when she is standing, against something, like a door or desk, she feels is way more better then when lying.

But man, it always feeels soo right. All her muscles tension, she is putting her nails in my back lol, i see her head looking up, holding her breath, and them im like: ''OK this must be it, here it comes.......'' and then she lets go of the breath like ''it's gone''.

I take all my time. I dont mind if we miss out a sex session and me pleasing her instead of the sex. Problem is, if she keeps getting this ''getting to the point and that suddenly let go'' thing for like 15 minutes, she also gets annoyed that she aint coming, which takes off the fun a bit.

We were also thinking about some vibration or something but hell I want to give her an orgasm..

 

Or she just cant come with you

 

Try the toys, perhaps once she comes with those (if she does) she may be able to come with you

 

Don't tell her to do anything.

Orgasm is not deliberately flexing your muscles.

Real orgasm the muscle spasms are involuntary, meaning you don't quickly and repeatedly grip your partners penis with your vaginal muscles, the spasmodic contractions are like epilepsy, its not something you try to actually do delieberately.

Foreplay of the entire body, the last thing you do is touch the genitalia.

Kissing gently, slowly, and passionately.

Tease her, tease her, keep teasing her for hours build the sexual tension for one week saying things that turn "her" on.

Caressing her really gently and slowly, showing her that you really care about her.

If you are just wanting to fuck her well then that means your not really going after the allusive orgasm.

Orgasm I believe is natures why of saying yes please I want your offspring fast !!

I believe orgasm is a special reward for taking your time and showing your partner that you REALLY love her and that you really are willing to do almost anything to please her at your own expense.

If you really want her to have an orgasm then your going to have to be prepared to do a lot of caressing for a long time, most if not all guys wont do it.

If they female says she doesn't want it, it is because your not doing it correctly.

I dont believe a women or girl would want to avoid real pleasure.

IF you can put in the time with caressing the right way maybe if you do everything right, maybe you will achieve it.

Its not easy to achieve if you do achieve it you will understand what I mean by the ultimate pleasure not only for her but for yourself.

Fuck means shock or wound its associated with self gratifaction at the expense of the other - this is really just abberation of sex and more to do with psychological problems that you are taking out on your partner.

 

*sighs* Had it ever occurred to her that the over sensitive feeling when you touch her clitoris might be an orgasm...

 

Coming from a girl who has experienced this firsthand, I can say this is very good advice. We have to kind of learn to orgasm from sex. It's a very psychological experience, and we have to be able to concentrate and clear our minds and live in the moment. If it starts to feel like work or like something we're doing because we're supposed to, it doesn't happen. It takes lots of patience and practice. We're usually pretty understanding about it, because you can't MAKE us orgasm if we're not in the right state of mind, so if you're doing all you can (communication, really working it), then that's all you can do, and the rest is up to us. Also, there are some things that just don't turn us on and are never going to work. Personally, I HATE having oral sex performed on me (though I love performing it on him because I know what he likes and his reaction is gold), and fingers will only take me so far before I'm screaming for a cock. My fiance knows this, so the other stuff is just for messing around, whereas when it's serious, he knows what to do.

 

One thing that is truely wonderful is making a humming sound whilst during oral sex, its natures vibrator. This is like a moan of pleasure rather than i drilling sound or a brrring. Feel the sound in your throat and bring the buzz to your lips.

I had a partner do this and it was amazing, totally
worked a treat, i told another lover what i liked and he tried and it was just not good, he couldnt get the idea at all..
It really is simple.
Good luck, may you have many years of love making and if she doesnt mind not coming then try not to make it a issue ...

Trust and understanding is a big turn on work on these and you cant go far wrong

Happy humming