3.0 grams of very potent shrooms lead to an unpleasant experience.

I just got back from spring break...I had a great time, but halfway into the week I had a bit of a bummer trip on shrooms. I didn't freak out, I just felt really bad, like super depressed. I remember thinking that if I felt that way all the time, I don't know what I do. I don't think I've ever wanted thorazine so badly, haha. I spent the majority of the trip holed up in my head, waiting for it to end. Maybe it's just because I wasn't enjoying the experience, but I had really bad time dilation. Five minutes seemed like thirty. I had this sense of impending doom, with nothing to actually fear. Just the fear.

Before I go into detail, let me tell you more about the mushrooms. They were either picked early (most likely), or all aborts (not terribly likely), because they were very small. There was probably 20+ whole mushrooms in my 3 grams. I think they may have had a higher psilocin : psilocybin ration. I feel like this would explain why they kicked in so fast, and why the trip seemed shorter. There was much less between coming down from the peak and hitting baseline than there has been in other shrooms trips I've done.

It started out on the dock. It was a chilly, overcast day. We were listening to Ratatat - LP3. I was anxious, like I always am while coming up. But at this point, I was still fine. I felt very clear, sitting cross legged on the dock, looking at everything around me. I was feeling tired, so I lied down and closed my eyes. After a few minutes of that, I had to open my eyes and sit up. There was something unsettling about the bubbling blackness behind my eyelids. At this point, I thought I heard someone say "Is he going to freak out?" Which made me think to myself, "Freak out? Why would I freak out? Don't freak out." I never freaked out, but I feel like that is when the trip began turning more sour.

After a bit longing of feeling bummed out, it started to rain so we had to go inside. This was right about as I was peaking. I wound up laying on a couch inside for a couple hours, feeling horrible. I felt anxious, like I wanted to cry, but for no particular reason. I was just experiencing those emotions. I really wanted to tell a sober person I was having a bad trip, but I felt like I had a very precarious grip on what was happening, and I was afraid I'd lose it if I tried to tell someone. Basically, my line of thinking was like this: I'm having a bad trip and I know it. I'll just wait it out. If I tell someone I'm having a bad trip, then they will react to me having a bad trip and I will react to their reaction...too many variables, best to try and stay contained.

I was feeling nauseas and sick (I'm going to the doctor on Monday for sinus problems. I kept imagining being in a hospital and dying, or feeling like this for the rest of my life. Just very negative thoughts, that seemed to always come back to me being in peril. I played with some Legos, it was a very good way of passing the time. It may have been the only thing keeping me together. I went outside, and my friend said it was 3:47. i was only expecting it to be 3:30 (my attempt to compensate for the time dilation). Since it was even later than I thought, I realized the time dilation was going away. And once I realized that, I came down. After I came down I felt sooo good, the absence of the bad mental affects was comparable to the presence of the positive ones you get on a good trip. "By Torpedo or Crohms" by Why? was played by my friend, and the part of the song that goes, "I'm still alive." Made me feel so good. I had just come out of a very unpleasant experience, but I was still alive!

 

sucks man. "is he gonna freak out", i hate comments like that. it's like, well NOW i might, thanks.

 

sorry about your bummer dude, and yeah, I hate when people ask you how you're doing, even if their intentions are good it's like "well I don't even know how I'm doing yet so now I have to think of something to tell this person so they don't think I'm freakin!" Shrooms are really weird they can be great, but they can show you things you may not want to see.

 

Shrooms can play some weird tricks on your head sometimes. If I ever have a trip start to turn I always think of the weird naked Indian guy from a Austin Powers movie. It was a spin from the Doors movie and the Indian in that movie. Anyway it always makes me lighten up and relax.

 

When you play around with shrooms, your bound to run into one of these trips eventually.

 

You need to trip on a WARM, sunny day. My one bad trip was exactly like yours. In fact I was also listening to Ratatat albums, specifically the trippiest, LP3, album. It was also a little chilly. I didn't concentrate on the cold, but it was the one day where it actually was chilly inside. The weather and cold give off bad energy as retarded as that sounds. And that bad energy expands as you peak, giving you your trip, it's "trip". Which btw is a common one. The shroom is the teacher, you've just been tought. Learn from it.

So many people suffer from winter depression, there's psychological and physical reasons behind it. Cold obviously having to relate to the feelings.
I could explain this forever until you believe me lol, but it's pretty obvious to notice how much better anything feels when you're warmer, and especially on magnified shroom trips.

Set and setting.

 

Dude, I don't doubt it. I felt sort of...refreshed after the experience. It still freaked me the fuck out though. I'm not sure exactly what I've been "taught," but I don't doubt that there is something for me to take away from the experience. I do feel richer.

Also, I'm pretty sure that I do get the winter doldrums, so it's odd that you mention that.

This is actually the second "bad" trip I've had on shrooms. The first wasn't nearly as dysphoric though. It was mostly just me being unprepared for 7 grams of cubensis. You can read about that here if you want http://www.hipforums.com/newforums/showthread.php?t=360339&highlight=quarter&f=118

 

Yeah it's bound to happen, but try and take a look if there were some underlying issues before the trip. I went through a trip like that, but it woke me up because I never really noticed or was aware of how depressed I was until the shrooms blatantly shoved it in my face. You can't out run yourself

When I was tripping on HBW, a friend, in the most negative and impacting tone just started telling me I was having a bad trip and shoving alot of heavy mean energy at me. After the trip I became aware of how he always treated me this way and that It really did affect me but I would try to shrug it off. We're no longer close friends.

Friends who can trip honestly and lovingly and give confident support instead of criticizing you are too friends Indeed!

 

Smoking a blunt on a quarter of shrooms... not surprised you had an intense trip haha, props.
You can never have the trip you expected too, no matter how much you research. Like you said in the other thread, words can't describe it. It'll only mislead your imagination. Hopefully your next trip is more euphoric. Although those trips as I said can really teach a lot, and by the sounds of it, they did.

Also you mentioned you were going in and out of reality. At 7 grams you should of completely let go.
This post might be useful to you on that matter.
http://www.shroomery.org/forums/showflat.php/Number/11014155#11014155

 

at least you had a good time

 

My last solo mushroom trip I had was alot of fun, but there were points in the trip where I was reflecting on my life, what I have done wrong, what I need to change and what I should have done. And just sat there crying all alone with all that shit going through my head. I came out of the trip knowing what I should do though.