How to be sure if my parter is having an orgasm

Discussion in 'Men's Issues' started by death valley, Sep 15, 2009.

  1. death valley

    death valley Member

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    me and my grlfriends are both have sex for the forst time with each other ...........but as i dont have any past experince i can tell if she has an orgasm or sumthin most of the time she is noisy and wet so i cant really figure it out........she doesnt even know wht an orgasm is she is just hapy tht she is doing it with me and she says tht it dont mater to her .........but still i wana really plesure her.......so plzz tell me how i can be sure tht she is havin an orgasm........and wht to do to give her an orgasm
     
  2. Zorba The Grape

    Zorba The Grape Gavagai?

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    If you want to give her an orgasm, oral is probably your best bet. As to telling if she is having an orgasm, there's not really any way to know for sure.
     
  3. caliente

    caliente Senior Member

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    How old are you? If she doesn't even know what an orgasm is, then it would really be a good idea to get a copy of The Joy of Sex or some other beginning book and read it together. The more you know and understand about sex, the better you can make it.

    I commend you for wanting to make it good for her, but Zorba is correct. There's no way you can be certain. If she tells you she did, and you believe her, that's the best you can do.
     
  4. kerouaconacid

    kerouaconacid Member

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    there really is no way to be certain, especially if she doesn't even know what one feels like.

    women fake them all the time, too. you can never be certain.
     
  5. Carlfloydfan

    Carlfloydfan Travel lover

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    If she doesn't even know what an orgasm is, you probably shouldn't be having sex.
     
  6. FireflyInTheDark

    FireflyInTheDark Sell-out with a Heart of Gold

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    I used to be like this, dude. Trust me, it gets old quick.
    For me, it just took practice. It was actually a long time before I could orgasm from sex- years even! Then one day. I loosened up and didn't worry about whether or not it would happen and it did!
    Just don't stop when she tells you to keep going. :frown:
     
  7. death valley

    death valley Member

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    thnxx for ur help...i m 18 btw
     
  8. death valley

    death valley Member

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    hey some times she tells me to stop bcus she says that she is feeling pain and i can also feel her pussy drying up is tht because she is near and orgasm??actually this hapens a loads of time.....we do it but aftr sumtime she starts to have this pain and says to stop......as i dont wana hurt her i stop.......her pussy also gets very tight and hard btw......is it bcus shes near an orgasm??
     
  9. FireflyInTheDark

    FireflyInTheDark Sell-out with a Heart of Gold

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    Drying up, in my experience, is not a good sign. Usually that means I'm getting bored. Ha!
    The pain could be from the dryness and friction.
    Tightening on the other hand is good.
    So if these things are happening at the same time, I don't know what to tell you. :confused:
    Maybe she's just not ready for sex? Something is emotionally holding her back? I would hope she wasn't physically underdeveloped, or you wouldn't be with her...
    Maybe she should see a doctor. Embarrassing yes, but they're bound by confidentiality (won't tell the parents) and mine were always very understanding. Never was I judged for being sexually active as a teen, but I started at 17. Not exactly a baby like some of these 12 year olds running around. :ack2:
     
  10. death valley

    death valley Member

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    my girl is not underdeveloped she is 17...............damn man thn u think i have to ask her to see a doctor thn........
     
  11. caliente

    caliente Senior Member

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    Firefly is giving you some good advice. Sex isn't always a simple thing, especially for young women. If she is getting dry after you've entered her, then something's definitely not right. And no, that doesn't mean she is nearing orgasm.

    But you really need more information than you can get from this site. Get some books with plenty of pictures and read them together. The more you know about sex, the better it will be for both of you.
     
  12. PB_Smith

    PB_Smith Huh? What? Who, me?

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    Sex and orgasm start for a woman long before you reach the bedroom.
    Treat her with kind gentle respect. Do things for her and compliment when it's not asked for or expected. That kind of stuff. Plunge out the toilet if it's stopped up if that what it takes.
    Seriously women need emotional as well as physical stimulation to achieve a real whizzbanger of an orgasm.

    As far as telling if she has had one, not sure if your new to each other, but I can tell when my partner is close and when she is there and when she is getting there again...and again...and again.
    But we've been together for over 17 years and really know each others bodies well.
    Thats when sex goes from good to HOLY SHIT!!! WOW!!!! OH MY GOD!!!!

    If she gets the weak kneed uncontrollable thigh and leg shivers, you've done good, reeeaal good.:D
     
  13. xLEFTOVERCRACKx

    xLEFTOVERCRACKx Member

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    I've only heard cold lips are the way to tell an orgasm. Not sure if its true but I dont really care. Sex is always much better if you're more worried about pleasing your partner rather than yourself
     
  14. Justin_Hale

    Justin_Hale ( •_•)⌐■-■ ...(⌐■_■)

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    I used to wonder how to tell if she was having an orgasm. She made the noises etc like she was, but i still wondered how real it was.

    Then one night, i was down on her and sort of accidentally licked, or touched her anus. She gave me the body signal that she liked it alot, and a moan too.

    So that became part of the foreplay from then on. I already knew she had orgasms during oral because i could taste it, but i got a big surprise during sex one night.

    She was on top and i happened to place my middle finger on her anus at just the right moment. She said she was cumming, and i could feel it on my fingertip. It was pulsing as she came! :eek:

    To see what it feels like right now, make a fist and put a fingertip from your other hand slightly into your fist above your thumb. Now squeeze your fingertip with your fist gently (3 or 4 squeezes a second).

    We were already married, so i haven't been able to test it on another woman.
    I have read that women have different degrees of intensity during an orgasm, so you may not be able to feel it, even though she realy is cumming. So don't just expect that to work.

    Also, i wouldn't recommend just putting your finger there out of the blue. She might not like it, and she could get mad. I worked my way into my situation over time, and with luck.
     
  15. TheSongRemainsTheSam

    TheSongRemainsTheSam Member

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    Women who fake orgasms piss me off. I'm one of those guys who is willing to put in extra effort AFTER sex to make her cum because I know that sometimes I get a little over exited and cant last as long as she would like me too.

    So if I go through the extra effort JUST to make sure that you are cumming, you better tell me the truth. This is something that if I found out the girl was lying to me about it, I would leave her. Because it takes the trust out of it.
     
  16. Morg_9

    Morg_9 Member

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    Taking this from the original post, if your girl doesn't know what an orgasm is, suggest to her that she do some research and get comfortable with masturbation. It may help her free up her sexuality and increase her knowledge of herself and what she wants/needs when she's with you.
     
  17. Shadow Walker

    Shadow Walker Member

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    Check out karasutra on youtube or her site (link to it from youtube) ive learned alot from her and i think it will help both you and her out. Watch them together and above all just have fun with it.


    ps. karasutra has a vid on this topic spacificly
     
  18. Sitka

    Sitka viajera

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    Polygraphs, for sure.
     

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