Alright I posted on here a few months about this situation that involved me liking this chick i work with while she was in a relationship. Long story short, she broke up with this guy a few months ago after i confess i like her a lot. She claims the breakup has a lot to do with me.... Anyways after they breakup she immediately comes to me. I've liked this girl for a long long time. We make out at this bar near my work. She literallly starts texing/calling me every day (she kinda was up to that point anyways but the frequency increases). At this point I'm lovin it bc I've been crushing on this girl for months and months. We start hanging out frequently, and in a 2 week period it really felt like we were dating. Like I said, I was cool with that bc I have liked this chick for a while. We did have sex a few times (which I feel like I sucked at bc I have been a long ass drought, I say this bc a weird part of me thinks that this was maybe all she was after?), but also went on a few dates. In this span of time she made comments like "I feel like we're already dating." She also had me come to her place and meet her sister, which I know is a big deal because she is a family girl. Now let me tell you some of the confusing I've experienced with this chick. Some of the things she has said "I can't stop thinking about you" "You know we're gonna be dating soon" and then one day she starts planning out all this shit me and her are going to be doing this summer. Mixed in there has been "I know I'm not ready for much" "I'm not emotionally ready for a a relationship" So we're hanging out and all is going well. We hang out for 2 nights in a row. This girl is coming to my place "just to cuddle." I'm letting her dictate all of this and she is loving it. All is a well, just a matter of time right? Nope. The next day I notice a decline in her texting so I decide to finally intiiate it. I ask her whats she's up to, just stupid generic convo bullshit. I get really shady/weird replies from her. Very unreceptive. So the next day she calls me and kind of apologizes for being so short, so I respond with something like "yeah i was gonna say something but i dont want to read into anything too much" and she replies with "I dont have to answer to you" in kind of a joking around way. So as the week goes on I notice more and more backing-off on her part, which naturally made me reply with more aggression. So I call her the one day and she doesn't answer. At work she's acting weird, so I shoot her a text after work "I'm getting vibes you're backing off, is this true or am I misreading things" A few hours later she replies "I guess you can say I'm backing off a bit, I'm just not ready for anything too serious" At that point I was kind of mad/frustrated so I told her I cannot talk to her outside of work for a while and she's seriously starting to fuck my head up at this point. She apologizes and says shes not trying to play games of fuck around. Ever since then it has been really weird at work. I'm getting frustrated because I don't know how to approach the situation any more passive, aggressive, passive-aggressive. This girl has me feeling crazy. I don't want to sit around waiting for her but I was really feeling the brief shit we had going on (and i'm pretty sure she was too). o based on what I told you (there is a lot going on here, too much to type), does this chick just need some time, was she just lusting for me and now that she got my cock she's done? How should I play this situation? Distant but pleasant? AHHHHH
I really can't tell whether she's interested or not, as I don't even know her. Nor you, for that matter. But it seems like even if she's into you she's not that sure about it, hence the "You know I'm not ready for much" and similars. She liked you but wanted you to be prepared for a break-up in case she found a better partner. Again, this is only a guess. (Needless to say, if this turns out to be the case, I'd adivise you to jump off the boat. When in a relationship we must not be seen as a Plan B!) I was discussing this with my best friend yesterday. When and what to be when in a relationship: passive or agressive? And should we show when we're interested? It seems like people tend to lose interest as soon as we show them it's reciprocal. I'm gay, she's lesbian and we have both experienced this. Do people like to be rejected?! (I think this question alone could make an entire thread) It seems like both women and men are only deeply interested and making a lot of effort to please as long as we don't reciprocate.
Hmm.. Coming from a chick's point of view, it sounds like she was using you as the rebound and has no idea what the fuck she wants. Don't let her jerk you around like that, she's probably getting off on you chasing her. Run now and don't look back. This will not end well for you especially since she just split from her previous relationship. She's not ready and that's not fair to you.
This is such a fucked up situation for me. I know me and this chick have chemistry. We have worked together mon-fri since september and I have gotten to know her. There was so much build up to us hanging out when she was in a relationship. Then when it finally happened it was great. There is definitely more than just lust going on here. Some other things she's said to me "this is beyond a crush for me." "I'd be all about a relationship with you but I don't want to ruin something that could be perfect because I know I'm not emotionally ready." I have never been so confused and worked up about a woman. The reason why it is hard to run from this is A. I still like her and I know there is something there from my end B. I work with this damn girl Mon-Fri Shit has gotten so weird at work since everything rolled back. That's why I don't even know how to approach her anymore. We've been friendly with each other, but she has definitley backed off. And because I know she's acting weird it's making me act weird. I'm thinking maybe I should acknowledge the weirdness at this point. I've asked a bunch of people I know how they would approach the situation. Half have told me to be aggressive and half have told me to back off and let her come to me if she wants to. This woman has me feeling crazy and I can't escape her wrath. I wish I could explain everything better, but it would be hard to write everything. This has literally been going on for months now... EDIT: I keep saying she is coming out of relationship but in reality she is coming out of 2 consecutive long-term relationships. One was 2 years and the last one was 9 months. Now I understand how this could burn someone out. But from a woman's perspective: How do you turn your back on something if you feel it is good? Could it really be too much too fast for her (like I said it did feel like we were sating for a weeks)? Or maybe this is just lust for her. FUCK
yeah i agree with SB, she was just on the rebound you showed that u were interested in her when she was weak and horny pretty much. i dont wanna sound harsh or anything, but it sounds like she got what she wanted from u and now she doesnt know what the fuck she wants. turn and run man! go find a girl who will appreciate u as much as u appreciate her. best of luck to ya
Yes. It's so easy to misinterpret your own feelings and blow them out of proportion. A few times I thought I was in love, but I look back now and realize I was just confused. I have never been "in love" and I never will be, because I don't love myself and it is an emotion I choose not to associate with. You can keep messing with this situation if you want, but you're just going to get hurt. I know it's hard and awkward because you are forced to see her, but you have more control over your feelings than you think. Seriously, just ignore her the best you can. Forget her, take care of your own self. Good luck man..
Something very similar happened to me a while back, Now I will never ever get involved with someone I work with again.
you actually plan on never loving yourself? i used to kind of hate myself too, but i always assumed it would get better eventually (which it did; now i'm a little narcissistic if anything). you always can say that, until the sexy new girl shows an interest...
I don't intentionally plan on it, I just don't see it happening any time soon, if ever. My self loathing seems to get worse as I get older. I'm not that worried about it, but I wish no one in my life cared about me, because then I care that they care and it's the only thing that stops me from ending it. ANYWAY...
Bitches love it when men are hopelessly in love with them. That's why I think women probably don't have souls.
well, i don't know you, but you seem to be a relatively entertaining poster at least. so you have that going for you. /thread derailment i don't think women have souls because the concept of a soul is pretty silly. although most women are in fact evil.
Nah.. I just fucking hate the way I look, lol And sorry... just regular old Ds. I do believe I have a decent nip to areola to boob ratio though. And the color is aight. What about poor old Kitch though?
good, no one wants boobs that are TOO big. although pics are still welcome, if you insist... he can get his own thread.
I think she is right. No offense but the girl kind of sounds like she is playing a lot of mind games. You don't need a mind fuck, you need to get the fuck away from her.
lol^ Man, I really have never been so confused by a chick. I was in a 5 year relationship before and this girl is a completely different animal. I know what everyone is saying about running. It's just so damn hard because of some of the shit she said to me. I really was 100% certain at one point that this girl would be mine. N No one thinks it's possible that the timing is just off? I don't know in the past this shit was easy "I like you" "I like you too, let's date." The last thing she said after I told her I don't think I could talk to her for a while was, "Look I'm not trying to play games or mess around here, I really thought I was ready for a while..." This girl really has drained me. If she never meant anything she said, she is souless. I asked her when we started hanging out if it was just about lust for her and she said "no this is more than a crush, there are definite feelings on my part, I'm just not ready for too much yet." It would be nice to here a success story with a situation like this ha. I'm tempted to say something to her but it's to the point where I don't want to feel like I'm swarming her. Plus, she technically owes me no explanation at this point. I'm going to do my best not to think about her, but my mind and thoughts are my own worst enemy to me lately. Probably seems irrational to some of you, but it's often hard to control thoughts like that. I'm working on forcing this thought process, but it hard to control the fact that this girl is impacting me. Anyways, this thread has some other interesting stuff in it. I wonder if other women think like sweetblasphemy. We our a product of our experiences. I have truly loved a girl before and I know she loved me back. If you have never experienced that before you wouldn't know what it is I guess...
