Saddened by the loss of an internet friend

A few months ago, I met a guy on a message board who I became good friends with. We began exchanging emails and talking about our day to day problems and lives. He was there for me and listened attentively to my work problems and problems with my spouce who I have been contemplating seperating from. My online friend began sending love songs to my email address and we started flirting, and I ended up giving him my cell phone number. He started calling all the time. It seemed for about a couple months, he was the only one there for me and I don't even remember when, but we began saying "I love you." He was kind, caring, and attentive. He was also in a relationship, which had alot of problems but was not married. He lived in another state from me, and I felt myself loving and connecting with him, so I asked him to look for a place in my area and move out here. I told him while he was doing all this, I would contact a lawyer and start divorce proceedings. He first said he'd think about it, and then said no. I dug deeper and got out of him that he was really poor and his girlfriend was helping support him, while he lived on disabilty. At that point, we kind of took a couple day break from our friendship, and didn't talk. We started talking again and agreed we both wanted to keep our friendship, we had had, although it wouldn't work if he moved out here. Nothing was ever the same though. It seemed he was no longer the attentive friend he was at the beginning. He began ignoring my messages some of the time, and stopped calling altogether. He began intentionally upsetting me. When I confronted him online, he only said, "I'm not ignoring you, don't know what your talking about." Then he just does it again. I checked out his myspace yesterday for the first time cause I had gotten more curious about him and in his picture album it showed just one picture of him and the girlfriend he lives with, and 2 of him with another woman, and one of him with 3rd woman. He was cuddling with all of them.

I feel sad, but also stupid, because I believed this guy was a good person who really ligitamitly cared for me, and in the end, he turned it into some cyber game. For example, on Easter, I sent him an Email- Easter card, and he thanked me claiming it was cute, when 1 week later I got the receipt saying he opened it! So he lied about that and claimed a card was cute that he hadn't even opened yet.

I miss having the friend I had in him, and I find myself feeling a loss and saddness, as though I didn't really know who this person was at all, even though I thought I did, from the message board we met on, his frequent phone calls for a brief time and messages, then him changing into someone and something quite opposite from the beginning.

 

I feel for you, thats harsh and painful but think yourself lucky lady you didnt meet up!
It sounds like he filled a void and you m'dear its clear have alot of love to give.

Missing someone is human nature, this shows you are caring and ready for a long term commitment, just be careful who it is with.

A new love wil come along fill your time with having fun, shine your brilliant light and draw in that special soul who deserves your time and energy.

Good luck,

xxx

 

You were married, he had a girlfriend and you start to get narky with him after you see a couple photos on facebook of him cuddling a few other girls (which may not really mean anything) ???

Also interesting that you took a break from the friendship once you found out he had a disability

I dont know everything of course, I wasnt there, but the way that Opening post reads, makes you sound like a bit of a bitch

If it was just a friendship, then why all the jealousy?

If it was just over the web or phone, then what does it matter whether or not he was doing the same with others, especially if it was just a friendship

 

Heh, sounds a little involving foe the internet.

 

No, we took a break from the friendship because I had directly asked him to look for a place out here to be with me, and he said basically that he couldn't make it on his own, without the help of a woman. I have a daughter, and I wouldn't want a man to move in with us right away, so he'd have to have his own place. He said NO to me! So we took a break cause I was sad that we couldn't be together. Also, age was a factor, and he was 30 years older than me. When we began to maintain our friendship again, with the agreement that we wanted things to stay the same although we both knew we couldn't be together because of the reasons I just explained, he never once called me again, as he used to all the time, and his emails became less frequent, often times putting me on the back burner, and not being the caring person he was at the beginning. I'm stepping away from this now, or trying to anyway... Although I still care about him, because it's really hard to turn feelings on and off so abruptly, I'm trying to get over it.