These days I spend so much time Continuing the eternal conversation Of self realization The internal voices Demons and Angels Constantly and consistently Vie for my attention So my ego is caught on the fence Stagnating between this tug of war Yet more often than not I am led here To be fed At the table of self fulfilling prophecy Presto manifesto Word becomes will Which in turn creates reality The kicker, the big catch Is that I am shamed to state I try to shirk this responisibility I hide behind that Go with the flow attitude Maintaining with perfect aptitude That safety zone Fovever in limbo So I don't have to care Translate that into fear Feeding the heart's secrets Becomes the task of Keeping a lid on my insecurities Playing the roles I go through the motions It's hard when all my heart wants Is to shine and shimmer like the stars Winking at the world Creating the blanket Under which all souls past and present Lay down in a great connected spiral Of death and birth As above So below Seasons are the literal metaphor For this action and reaction dance I am caught up in. Slowly, so slowly I feel time Creeping up on me Some ominiscent righteous voice Urging me to start that personal ad For the afterlife: White female Seeks guru, personal savior, or otherwise Enlightened individual For spiritual guidance Discovering forgotten reincarnations And long talks about nirvana-esque states Tantric awareness a plus. So it goes like this I am really afraid of Getting older I guess I wouldn't feel this way If half the things I set out to acheive I actually do make it into a realized state I am confused Constantly slapping my brow What that classic -Doh!- Wanting so much to make sense of this life Wishing I could focus for more than Five minutes on any one goal But I am too flighty Too spastic to pay attention for long Forever the eternal conflict goes on My soul becomes the ring for A boxing match Between dreams and ideals Where all that matters is that I become something Rather than go on being nothing
I can relate to this. It's like you try to change something, motivate yourself to do good and evolve...but there's a force that's always holding you back...or that force is you and you're holding yourself back. Be inspired, love yourself and your mind...it's all you've got.
Thank you, I enjoyed your poem. Namaste ~* Cosmic Consciousness Expand beyond the River of Not, with the Bridge of Equality, into Infinity.
