Strangely enough, the only thing I'm venting about is myself. I'm WAY too questioning, if that makes sense. I question EVERYTHING. I've questioned so much, in fact, that I'm kind of convinced that my ex-boyfriend is a robot (has no consciousness), that life is an illusion, that I don't exist, and that none of my memories are actually real. I've just fabricated them and there's no point asking other people for validation because, God forbid, maybe they don't even exist in the first place! I am beyond confused and NOTHING makes sense to me anymore...my thoughts are just one mad jumble in my head and I can't sort fact from fiction anymore. Even the simplest thing, like eating, has become a massive ordeal...WHAT IF eating processed food or food with additives is actually somehow draining my consciousness because only natural foods should be eaten...WHAT IF becoming a vegetarian was a bad decision because you need meat for some unthinkable reason to be fully conscious...WHAT IF vegetables are conscious and I'm hurting them?! I mean seriously, why the FUCK can't my mind give it a rest for two fucking minutes! I've totally lost myself in this mess of thoughts.
Why why why why why, what if? Just realise that having the answers will not free you, there will always be questions, and the answers to these question lead to more questions. There is nothing wrong with asking these questions, infact its probally good for you, but try and realise that they not that important. You're making these questions important enough that they are troubling you and driving you crazy. Just relax, go out, smoke some weed, meditate, I don't know, do somthing to calm yourself, and realise that a lot of it dosn't really matter, not really.
