Hi I want to ask the older ones here a question, really need some hippy wisdom here. None of my friends my age seem to have the same problem or worry about it like I do. I'm in my mid 20s but I feel more comfortable with older people, I just relate to them more. The problem is that I can't really see a future for me. I've had these thoughts for about 10 years and people always say you'll find your direction but it just hasn't come. Interests have come and gone, i've studied and still study, i've travelled a lot and there's nothing I can say "this is what i want to do for the rest of my life". I used to worry about it but not so much any more. I made a decision a few years ago to NEVER do something i'm not happy with, like work as a businessman or harm the environment. And i'm cool with that, but I still don't have a path. I'm hoping one will turn up if i just follow my heart. So did any of you have this problem? Did you just go with the journey and ended up where you wanted, or never found a path? Everyone including my family seems shocked I don't have a career goal or anything, and am wasting my life or something. I'm not too bothered by it, but at the same time I don't want to regret it 20 years later. Thanks and eternal love to all
I can only speak for myself. It does seem like everybody has a goal they are reaching for - at least that is what our parents, our teachers, television tell us. It seems everybody should be striving for a goal. Me - I was never sure, no idea really. It seems life was one day at a time and let's see what happens tomorrow. I was just living life. So what happened? I worked and partied hard when I was younger - the partying is now pretty much gone but I still work hard, am consistent and reliable. That has worked for me. I'm not a lawyer, Dr., or airline pilot but I get by alright. I have a home, a family, two cats in the yard etc. etc. True, I would like to have more money - who doesn't (be they rich or poor), But checking out the news it seems wealthy professionals are more miserable that folks that just work for a living. At this point in time, don't sweat it. Live your life and enjoy what you have. If something comes your way that you are interested in - grab it - don't let it slip away. But live your life now - not in the future. Who knows what the hell might happen tomorrow. If you take inventory you will find that you really have a hell of a lot of what really is important in life.
Well, I think you're exactly right in that, but you might have to give your heart a little assistance. What I mean is, you can't just expect your "true path" to fall out of the sky, although some people are lucky and theirs does. You might have to pursue a bunch of different things before you find one that rings the truest for you. That's a legitimate concern, and you're very perceptive to see it at your age. There aren't too many things sadder than a 40 or 50-year-old who has floundered all their life and never had a real purpose. I don't think there is necessarily only one path to follow the rest of your life, any more than there is necessarily just one person to live with the rest of your life. But I do think you need to find something that has meaning for you, whatever it is. In my experience, the happiest people are those who contributed something to the world or to other people. I don't mean you have to be Mother Teresa, but selfish indulgence eventually wears thin, and leaves you empty and unsatisfied. The trick is to find something that matters to you, and also contributes something to the world, even if only in a small way. The best of luck to you
Granny, you've got it right. I remember being 34-35 before that question smacked me in the head. With me it was "What am I here for? Well a bunch of years laters, I'm almost 47, and I've found a niche. You do have to look within to a certain degree. What Am I good at? What Hobbies etc do I enjoy? Do I have good or bad quality friendships? I am very picky about GOOD friends, the ones who NEVER let you down. Now I am a simple homemaker. I don't go out to work. I stay home, clean house and cook in between hobbies, that and a little gardening suit me just fine. I had no "moral support" from my family-from my Dad I got derision, from Mum, nothing. It's a hard row to hoe, but THINK and think hard. And though to some it may sound hokey--PRAY for direction, it does help. Take Care and keep your chin up! Lois
I saw the Documentary "Fierce Grace," about Ram Dass. One of the things his guru told him was "Serve others, Feed others and Remember God, this is the path to enlightenment." Everytime I've done this life has gone well for me. Peace Out, Rev J
I don't know how to do those things, besides remembering god which I try to do every day. I'm trying to set myself free of fear and anxiety over having to live a way I don't want to live, but that effort in itself is a prison. It all seems like a giant trap with no way out besides hiding or running away.
walsh, I went through that same thing when I was younger. I bounced back and forth between shit from 15 to my mid twenties... made some great money (too much!) at times, was broke others... Almost everyone I looked at around me was unhappy. I don't mean as in they were always wandering around moping or whining, but catch them in off-guard moments and a deep yearning for something other then what they had would show through the cracks... Didn't matter if they were 30 or 60... didn't matter if they had one job their whole adult life or 50 of them, everyone was in the same boat... For me, a lot of it came down to the simple fact that they were all literally just a few weeks (some a few months) away from disaster. One person in particular really drove this home to me. He built a successful company, made lots of money, had all the toys a person could want (plus extras)... and was the downright meanest, unhappiest son of a bitch you could ever meet... and like everyone else, if a few of his customers didn't pay their bills on time, he would face disaster. I thought to myself, how does any of this make sense? Work you ass off your whole life, and regardless of which path you choose (from the normally visible ones), you are in the same place you were when you started? So, instead of looking around at what others were doing, I looked inside, to what I wanted out of life... family, friends, security, food, water, shelter, clean air. I tried to find something 'conventional' that supplied it... When I couldn't find what I saw in my head, I decided I would create it myself. Seems I had no means to do so at the time, I looked for the start of a path that could lead me there... not the whole path... the journey is what you discover as you go along... all that matters, is that you find a starting point, and then move, hopefully forward, but sometimes backwards or sideways helps more... but the point is, from where ever you are, the only thing you need to find for the path, is the starting point from where you are. If I were to jump back and time and look over my path to where I am, it was a hugely fucked up 'path', but on looking back over it now, it seems it was a direct line... from the starting point of when I decided to do it, to where I am now.
just keep going with as much consciousness as possible... notice the opportunities... don't listen to negative critisism... that's about their fears, not yours... ask the gods of your understanding to show you... enjoy what feels good to you, learn from what feels bad but, be grateful for EVERYTHING!!! i suspect that at some point in the future, you will realise that you were ALWAYS on your path afterall... peace
Just keep trying different things. There's always more than one way to achieve you're goals and aspirations.
It's easier than you think. Here are a couple of things that I have done as an example. I volunteered at a food pantry handing out food to underprivileged people in the Mission in San Francisco. I don't know where you are but you can very easily do that too. While I was doing that I ended up getting a temp corprate job where I really didn't have much to do for $15 an hour. Currently I work as an attendant for disabled people. I was talking to someone who has helped me get leads with clients that I almost had to be dragged kicking and screaming into this line of work. He started laughing and asked "Why, you are so good at it?" I had no experience and no skills in the trade and to be honest I was scared shitless. But now in this time of recession with a 10% unemployment rate in the SF Bay Area I'm actually working 7 days a week doing something I enjoy and turning down clients. The pay isn't great ($11.50 an hour) but I have alot more freedom than I've had at most jobs I've had beforee this. I can maintain the long hair and hippie type appearance, and at the end of a shift smoke a little with some of my clients. Peace Out, Rev J
I can't really add to much here that hasn't already been said. I never had a goal, except to make a living and be independent. After getting out of the Air Force in '67 I bounced around in several disparate jobs, just following the path of least resistance (Hmm I am a water sign). But I just looked for work, then took off on the road, came back to New Orleans found work again - diff jobs not on any career path, then take off again. Without a goal in life, I did amass experience - and that to me is what life is about. I have gone to India twice, Central America and lived in several states. In the mid '70s I got into Eastern thot and "right livelihood." And I guess that became my career, wiping asses in nursing homes, hospitals and taking care of crazy ppl. I did volunteer work at a free clinic in New Orleans and India. Now I am still in the field but fell into an office gig. I guess what I'm saying is I have no regrets about the course of my life. And I never really had a goal.
Fantastic advice, thanks guys. I think i'll keep doing what i'm doing, as long as i'm not suffering or harming anyone something's bound to turn up.
