should I wear shoes?

I am not a full time barefooter as most of you, but I do go barefoot as often as I can, including work. I am recently divorced and seeing a Gentleman who never goes barefoot, evn at home. I never wear shoes at home even when I have visitors for dinner or ect...
My problem is I recently was invited to a dinner at his home, he had invited a few family members, co workers and friends. I was there to help prepare and took a shower and dressed before the guest arrived. I WORE A nice conservative dress but remained barefoot as I would normally do at home. I did notice that I was the only one barefoot the entire evening but it did not bother me.
Later that evening when the guest left, we was cleaning the dining room when he mentioned it that I was barefoot during dinner and entertaining guest. He asked in a very nice way if I thought it was proper etiquette to entertain guest without wearing shoes.
So I need your advice, is it alright to entertain guest and serve dinner barefoot or should I wear shoes in the future?

 

You're asking whether you should change your ways from something that feels right to something that feels wrong, just because someone else wants you to. The answer is of course a NO, and will always be a no in any situation where you're not harming anyone else and not having any impact on anyone else. If not wearing shoes is who you are, then just do it and people who don't like it can deal with it.

 

I believe it was perfectly acceptable to entaintain the guests while barefoot. I have been to a social gathering where both the husband and wife including most of the guests were barefoot. As regards to your situation, it is summer and assuming you are living in Ohio, the temps were in the 90's there yesterday. The feet of your newly found friend must have been sweating away in those shoes and socks. How dreadly uncomfortable! Assuming it was an informal gathering and considering the time of the year, I'd come to think your friend would be a bit more understanding.

You need to tell your friend about your barefooting and how it plays an important role in your life. He needs to come to accept your lifestyle, and need to learn that the sky will not fall if you are barefoot in particular situations in the future.

 

Not everyone is good with this. He may be too uptight about it and obviously you are not. This is probably a good time to talk about it. You may enlighten him or discover many other issues.
The answer for this dinner would involve the guests. You do need to make them at ease if you invite them into your home. The little things you do for friends.

 

Unless your entertaining his "boss" I see nothing wrong. And actually, even then I see nothing wrong. If he is uptight about your choice or what his co-workers think, i dunno that just seems insecure to me. But since I've never cared what people, including co-workers or bosses think, who am I to say I guess.

 

You're not at home! It may not have bothered you that you were the only one barefoot but it may have offended his guests. I have been to dinner parties where a host, in the comfort of their own home, is barefoot and they will ask, "I hope you don't mind if I am barefoot". 10 out of 10 times no one objects. It is about making the right impression with people who you have never met and making the right impression with your "Gentleman". Once there are no objections, it becomes a precedent! And precedent always trumps proper etiquette!

 

so someone raised an etiquette argument. etiquette does not mean anything at all. it is just a stupid leftover of dead ages prescribing the exact position and usage of a fork but not forbidding to be an insensitive selfish prick, which does not make much sense to me if the goal is being gentle and polite with others. etiquette imposes like religions a lot of meaningless rules voluntarily observed by people who don't ask questions to meet expectations of their peers by following a ceremonial. i think there are just a few things less hip than etiquette, so fuck the damned etiquette, man.

 

I'm def going with Jagerhans on this. If you and he see more of each other and someday you're hosting his friends and co workers at your place (forced to) does that mean even on your home court you can't be you? And what happens if you two become so tight that there are now 2 home courts, then do you have to ask permission to be yourself....to be comfortable? I think not in any way. What is being advocated (by your friend and barefootman) is a total control thing. It's sorta the whole I'm comfortable with my friends but not yours so you need to dump your friends deal.

 

In general I would say yes its ok to entertain and serve dinner barefoot. However I think certain conditions may dictate otherwise. I am always barefoot at home and have entertained many friends and family members barefoot. On these occaisions anyone who wanted to was also welcome to bare their soles.

In order to answer your question I think we need to know if this was a formal or casual dinner.

Obviously your gentlemen friend is not a barefooter. At some point in time you'll have to confront that. He needs to know that you like to be barefoot (and perhaps not just at home). Is this going to be a problem? You also have to decide if you're ok with him never being barefoot.

 

I think you should have worn shoes. Sometimes personal preference comes a close second to common etiquette. Say you never used a knife and fork at home, which some people do not

it's manners, just for a meal with company to eat with utensils- it's probably polite to respect the hosts wishes and wear shoes, it wont kill you.

Do what you like at your own party. For the record everyone else here is a bare footer and thus bigoted, I am impartial and believe you should consider general manners. If someone else farted sitting next to you, would you have been amused?

 

you're not coming to my next dinner party, sorry!

 

here in south central texas right now... fuck shoes!

i wear my hiking boots when i go into the woodland around my house. deer shit, poison oak, poisonous snakes, etc. don't want to step in or, on any of that!

if i'm out around town, i wear sandals.
you get your feet burned and blistered, if you go around barefoot outside right now.

i'm at home right now and, barefooted.

i sweat quite badly. it takes only about 2 to 4 hours before my feet stink in shoes from all that sweating.
even with my shoes on, i have had, alot of people tell me, my feet stink through the shoes!:ack2:


when i have gone to something sort of formal, i wear black sandals and black socks. never have had anyone bitch about it yet.


you might try something like what i do, to meet others' halfway.


if your boyfriend tells you something like, "it's my way or the highway!"
over small shit like wearing shoes...
sister, i hate to tell you this; there is big time bad shit a head, in your relationship with him!
going barefoot is not the problem. he is the problem!
you might consider finding a boyfriend who is not controlling.

 

fuck wearing shoess

you could meet him halfway and get some crocs or comfortable slippers

 

Yes.!!......:leaving:



Cheers Glen.

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by The Imaginary Being
If someone else farted sitting next to you, would you have been amused?

LOL!!!! :rofl:

 

Whenever my wife and I have guests during warm weather we're barefoot. In the winter we wear socks. We have nice bamboo floors and don't want them scratched. While we don't require our guests to take off their shoes, we invite them to do so if they're comfortable. It would have been interesting if you'd asked your friend if he wanted you to wear shoes and see how he responded. Next time you might ask. I doubt there would have been any issue if you'd worn shoes to start and then kicked them off.

 

Do not change who u are.IF HE CARES for u,he will accept u 4 who u r!If he criticizes u for being barefoot,whats next! DUUUMP Him girl.

 

My God, wearing shoes in your own home.. is this what society has gotten to?

People are truly insane.

 

Maybe you should point out to him that in my cultures the etiquette is to remove footwear when entering a house and even here in England it's quite common,especially if there are carpets,shoes are muddy or a women's wearing killer heels which might damage the floor.

It reminds me when we viewed a new place to live a few years ago and the letting agent asked us to remove our shoes before entering,oblivious to the fact my feet were bare anyway!

Ultimately it depends how much you feel about yer man,explain to him your preference for going barefoot and also ask him straight if your barefoot performance at the dinner party caused offence to him or the guests.I hope this won't break your relationship.

For what it's worth my partner struggled to get her head round my barefooting but she's come to terms with it now,she just insists my soles are clean before bedtime

 

Maybe you should point out to him that in my cultures the etiquette is to remove footwear when entering a house and even here in England it's quite common,especially if there are carpets,shoes are muddy or a women's wearing killer heels which might damage the floor.

It reminds me when we viewed a new place to live a few years ago and the letting agent asked us to remove our shoes before entering,oblivious to the fact my feet were bare anyway!

Ultimately it depends how much you feel about yer man,explain to him your preference for going barefoot and also ask him straight if your barefoot performance at the dinner party caused offence to him or the guests.I hope this won't break your relationship.

For what it's worth my partner struggled to get her head round my barefooting but she's come to terms with it now,she just insists my soles are clean before bedtime