Long-time stoner wants to quit...but argh, it's actually really hard for me!

I'm 27 and I've been a steady stoner since I was 15, with occasional breaks here and there that usually lasted no longer than a month. I'm most definitely never going to be anti-cannabis, and I can most certainly name many benefits to it for many people. That being said, I just don't think I should smoke anymore for a variety of reasons. It's become one of those situations where I over-use, but I've found it very difficult to be just a "once a week" smoker if you know what I mean. I'm very all or nothing about it. It's getting to the point where I'm not even really enjoying it so much anymore because when I first smoke up I feel better (when I go all day without smoking, I get irritable and kind of headachy before I toke up), but then after the buzz sets in I don't even feel as high as I used to, and feel more lethargic and like I'm in a slump. I get a brain fog, I forget things...all the stereotypical stoner stuff. I'm back in college after a few years away (after dropping out the first time), and I really want to do as well as I can this time, and being stoned really does have a big effect on my ability to retain new information. I thought that perhaps I could just study and work sober, then get high in the evenings, but even that is having a profound effect on my memory and cognition. Way back in the day before I ever tried smoking, I had an amazing ability to memorize new information. Now I have to work extra hard to retain things. I consider myself intelligent, but I really do feel like oversmoking all these years has damaged my intellectual abilities enough that it really bothers me. I want to see if after some time away I can get some of that mental focus and memory ability back.

I've tried to quit before with the intention of smoking a few times a year (which would of course make it much more intense and thus fun for me), but my willpower sucks. My intent was to smoke on "special occasions." When I attempted to go that way, I rationalized every party I ended up at as being a special occasion...lol. It's extremely difficult to pass that bowl or joint to the next person without taking a puff. I love not just the high but the social ritual. That being said, I also love my brain to work the way I need it to (as this time around in college I'm not just trying to pass through, I really want to learn and understand what I'm being taught so I can put it to use in my career goals, which I'm highly passionate about), and it's getting to the point in my life where I want that more than I want to get high...but there are difficulties.

I just don't want to be like the main character in that movie Smiley Face who has lost all other passions and is just a burn-out stoner. Again, I want to reiterate that I'm not anti-cannabis. I feel that it has enormous potential medicinally, economically through legalization as a recreational substance (It's way better than booze for sure!), and otherwise. I just feel like I've very badly overdone it all these years, have lost some of my optimal mental functions, and now have a slight addiction as it were (I don't know the chemical nature of this addiction, I just know that I suffer unpleasant symptoms of withdrawal of a sort). I suppose any substance can become a problem for someone. I admit that I have a problem, although it's not as bad as if I were an alcoholic or addicted to hard drugs.

Has anyone on here ever quit for an extended period of time and had success? If so, what did you do to help with that initial early period of having trouble sleeping, having a headache, being a little grumpy, etc.?

 

I also want to add that I do have several friends who smoke, but it's not your typical scenario of that being the only thing we have in common. I don't hang with people that I don't have a deep connection with ~ when I was younger maybe, but not these days. So it's not like I'm willing to completely disconnect myself with people just because they might be smoking around me. I have to learn to have the willpower to say, "no thanks, not this time" and pass it along. They're not the kind of people who would judge me for it, either. It's just my own, personal struggle with my will power.

I wanted to elaborate that part of my reason for wanting to quit is that it gives me a temporary state of satisfaction without having actually done anything to make myself satisfied, if that makes any sense at all. Anyway, gotta go. I appreciate any constructive comments or insight.

 

It would take a life changing event for me to try and stop! I do understands why people do, but I have been smoking for at least ten years and I am not "burn out" and by the way Smiley face is an awesome movie HAHA. As far as quitting goes I would try to just keep busy, find new interests, I have a feeling its not going to be easy at all. You will just have to put youself in a position when your friends are smoking to either not be in the circle or away from the crowd till they are done or just ask them not to pass to you, if you are serious about it I am sure you friends would help you!

 

Change comes from within....quitting ANYTHING that you enjoy and even depend on for whatever reasons can be life changing,you dont have to smoke every round of every doob....start passing after a hit or 2...put that joint out 2 thirds left and save it for later...dont hit the bong...give the bong away...real old school heads think they are stinky and gross anyway[for kids]...

its not rocket science...
your hearing will improve
your taste will improve
your grumps will eventually fade
you will stop wearing track pants to the bar

good luck

 

I need to quit too, im going to be joining the military in a couple of years, as a musician, but Id still like to be in peak physical and mental shape.. It fuckin sucks because I party hard.. I also have to cut back on alcohol, and try to quit smoking cigs too

 

LOL, I very much enjoyed your reply, although I've never worn track pants to any public place aside from the gym. My fashion tastes are questionable, but not that questionable...lol ~ I forgot to say that I honestly have tried the whole smoke a couple of hits and save it for later, but that's exceedingly hard for me to do. Unfortunately I think I may need to just be completely a non-smoker to get back the mental faculties I once had. I have also never owned a bong, although I know plenty of old-school heads and by my observations none of them ever pulled one of them out as they're somewhat impractical. I do like vaporizers a great deal but never felt compelled to spend that amount of money on something like that.

I know I just have to buckle down and get through a few days of the withdrawal until I feel normal again. I have to keep telling myself there was a time in my life, before I ever tried drugs, that I was able to tap into a relaxed state just from doing things I loved to do. I wanted to be a scientist when I was a kid (and I still do), and I had a lot of fun doing my own experiments, studying samples I collected of plants and rocks around my house and in the woods behind my house, and reading about all sorts of things. My interests turned toward astronomy when I was a pre-teen and my dad got me my first telescope. We lived in the country then, so I spent a lot of nights in the summer mapping the night sky and tracking celestial objects. It became an obsession. I'm not saying that pot made me a total burnout kid, but I may have possibly gone for more science-related extracurricular stuff when I was a teenager had I not picked up my "hobby" of pot smoking. I would probably have been more on top of pursuing the education needed to get me on the career path I want. I didn't ever completely lose my interest, but I sort of put it on the back burner once I started smoking regularly as a teen. I wasn't fully aware of it at the time but I think I avoided Science Olympiad and other after-school stuff that I would've probably loved doing because I wanted to go get high after school and hang around being stoned. I guess for me I always felt like a weirdo and being high made me feel good about being strange...but now that I'm an adult I can find ways to feel good about myself without the aid of a substance. On the flip side of that, "turning on" did get me to become interested in other subjects like music, art, social justice issues, journalism, philosophy, history, etc. and perhaps the experience has helped me become a more well-rounded person (even though science is still my first love). But it was, because I was still growing, probably not a good idea to try it at that young an age.

To be completely honest, I wish I'd waited to try weed until I was an adult, as I would've been more mature and had more of a sense of identity when I tried it. I forgot to mention as well that I have a few friends who didn't try it until they were older and they're more able to be the once-in-awhile smokers than I feel I'm able to be. They get high after like 2 hits and are done with it, where I just keep smoking and smoking until it's ash.

Either way, I'm back in college and on the path to hopefully becoming a scientist in the field of astrophysics. At first I was afraid that I'm too old to enter an academic undertaking that'll consume a number of years, until I found out that it's actually quite common for people to take several years off after completing their undergrad work before returning to grad school. I aspire to become a Ph.D. student and while I'll need to complete my undergrad coursework before really knowing what I'd like to work on in the field, I already have some dissertation ideas floating around in my mind. That's going to require a lot of concentration, attention to fine detail, and intellectual energy to comprehend and learn. I know a lot of qualitative stuff about astronomy just from reading about it as a hobby, but professionally it requires the ability to understand things quantitatively as well. In short, I'm going to need to do a lot of higher math, and with my memory as impaired as it can be, I just don't need to be a stoner anymore.

For the record, my favorite astrophysicist of all time, Dr. Carl Sagan, loved smoking pot on occasion and he thought of it as a creative assist - ideas would come to him while stoned and then he'd test them in a sober state. So I acknowledge that people are able to be successful while smoking, but I do think moderation is the key to this (which is what I have a hard time with). His widow, Ann Druyan, is on the board of directors for NORML. Both Ann and Carl, however, acknowledged that overuse of cannabis can be a problem for some people, particularly when it becomes an everyday habit. I suppose I can look to that for a little inspiration. Maybe one day I'll be able to be the one who can just take a couple little puffs and then be done with it, every once in awhile.

Anyway, thanks everyone! I was hoping I wouldn't get replies telling me I shouldn't quit because that would be selling out to the man or whatever...haha. I don't care what the man thinks, I just want to improve my memory and cognition, and have more self-control over my recreational drug use. I also love psychedelics, although it's been a good 2 years since my last trip. I like the idea of an annual trip - it's like a vision quest for me. I've never had a bad trip, either, because I always make sure I'm in the right setting with the right people, and it always helps me get to a place where I'm at peace and having a great understanding of any current problems I've been having, and also opening me up to things I may not have tried before to improve my quality of life and my relationships. I'm not a "drugs are baaaad mmkay?" person, and even when we were being brainwashed during DARE classes in the 6th grade I never bought what they were saying about it.

 

stop buying weed.

get a gym membership.

smile.

 

What a coinky dink that I found this thread today. It's the first day of my indefinite weed break. I too find myself needing to get back to a sober state.

I quit smoking tobacco, and let me tell you, all it takes is willpower and confidence. If you have the determination to do it; you will be able to do it.

Tell yourself whatever you have to to keep on the mission; and be proud of every second you go without. =)

 

i did give up for a few months, well, almost a year so, yes i was successful for a while... i do smoke much less now than i used to.... i will try again soon to give up completely, because i remember the clarity i felt... i was able to communicate more clearly... don't get me wrong, i CAN communicate, but it just takes me longer... i liked the feeling of spontaneity that not smoking brought me... having said that, i really do enjoy a smoke sometimes... i would hope that one day, i could smoke for a few days of the year... hasn't been possible yet, although i do go for weeks without a smoke at the moment, so it could be possible... Aaaanyway, if you want the fast linear clarity instead of the slow version, for your studies, then go for it!

yes, the initial period is uncomfortable... the sweats, the anxiety and the headache... i drank herbal teas... one for stress and difficulties sleeping (Valerian) and one for de-tox (my personal choice being Rosehip)... i was just very gentle on myself emotionally... slept a lot at first... that lasted for about one month... then got a little more physically active... took more walks... have you ever done stuff like cave-exploring, rowing on a river, rambling... you may not find those things appealing but there must be thousands of things available... take your pick

for some people it is enviromental... you may need to take yourself away from your usual patterns... go on an extended holiday... i went on a rambling holiday...

after a few months, you will be so glad you did it!... good luck with that...

p.s. if you fail, don't worry, you can try again... if you really don't want to fail, don't even pick one up for many, many years, if ever...

 

if you can go a month without smoking, you can go even longer, until you are not smoking at all

 

youll get PT til you puke, so whatever you ate in kindergarten , be prepared to say hi to it..

 

First week is hard. After that it's easy.

You will probably find that you're much sharper in a few months, if you've gone that many years with never more than a month break, you're permastoned... you'll see what I mean when you've been sober for a month and realize you're high as fuck after walking up a hill Just gotta give all those cannabiniods a chance to get out of your system.

 

I actually remember that feeling coming to me randomly during my month off in like the third week after some physical exertion and then feeling really groggy after it kind of wore off. Ah well, it's going to be worth it.

Everyone, thanks for the replies! I really appreciate all of them and the positive nature of them. My family knows I smoke(d), and yesterday over dinner I told my mom, my sister, and my stepdad that I'm quitting. They're not anti-pot people, as the 'rents smoked a lot in their younger years, but I think they do have the belief that people should quit as they get older, that it's kind of "kid stuff" to keep it up through your 30's onward (although I'd argue by my experience that teens should wait til they're older to try it), and my sister while being insanely liberal never tried it herself nor did she ever want to. So now I have some pressure not to give in to the cravings when I do quit. I don't like lying to my family since we have finally gotten to a point where we have a solid and transparent relationship, so the pressure is on (but in a good way I assure you). They all told me they were proud of me for deciding to quit. Either way, I think telling them was a good idea for me, because I tend to stick to my goals when I share them with people I'm very close with.

 

Thats really good that you told your family about what you are trying to do. It is a great incentive, like you said, to try and stop something when you have loved ones behind you.

Best of Luck to you man. Keep us all posted with your progress.

 

I'm very surprised, pleasantly, by the encouraging replies I've replied here, as often people want to say nay to anyone who wants to quit. I'm having a really hard day today. I had originally said this week is my last week, but I feel in a down mood, or just feel really moody and groggy every time I've gotten stoned this week. Call it "getting low" lol. Today I have an odd weekday off, and I'm VERY emotional. I've already cried TWICE today. I've decided that even though Saturday is my "official" day one, I just don't think I should smoke at all today, and possibly not tomorrow.

So many people deny that pot can be a problem for someone, but it can be. It is for me! Not everyone becomes dependent on it as I have, and I acknowledge that. I'm still for legalization. But damn, this is so hard for me. I'm all over the place emotionally today as I mentioned before. I have a lot of years of dulled and deadened emotions to get through...damn. haha.

Sorry to be such a scatterbrain, but thanks for the support everyone!

 

I used to be a pretty hard-core stoner, so I know how you feel. I can tell you about my experience, and maybe that will help.

So when I started out, smoking weed was just fun. Then it was still fun, but I couldn't stop. Then even when I really tried to stop, I couldn't, and that's when it really became a nightmare for me. I just felt really trapped. As time went on, getting high just became something really weird and negative, and I think getting to that point is one of the things that helped me quit.

I was not someone who could get a bag and just sit on it. If I had weed, I had to smoke it.

I am skeptical that anyone who is at a point where I was (getting high at every opportunity) can go to a point of just being an occasional smoker. I had quit for a time and took up an opportunity to smoke, and found that I was right back where I was. Even though I had quit for a while, as soon as I got high I felt the need to be high regularly again.

Hooray for anyone who can just smoke once a week, but that was just not me. Sea of grass, I think it may be important to realize that people who just smoke once a week are different from hard-core stoners. If you were cut out to be a once-a-weeker, you probably wouldn't have become a problem smoker in the first place.

Keeping away from weed as much as possible may help. Hopefully you can tell your friends that you want to quit, and they will be supportive. If you are not around weed you can't smoke it, so that may be a helpful approach.

You may want to take a semester off to try to detox. It depends on how you will react. If you think, "oh well, I'm not in school, might as well get high" then obviously it would be a bad idea. If being in school is the necessary motive to quit, then stay in. I'm suggesting taking a semester off because handling the stress of quiting may be really tough, and there's weed connections at schools pretty much everywhere. I'm imaging some work opportunity in a remote place that has no weed, and your returning to school when you've achieved better mental clarity.

I didn't have the same kind of withdrawl symptoms that you had, so I can't relate. Acupuncture and chinese herbal medicine is good for a lot of things, including recovery from addiction. Meditation and regular, gentle aerobic exercise are good things. You don't need to exercise more than 1/2 an hour a day, a don't even need to break more than a very light sweat (I think it's even better to keep it gentle than to push it). Energy practices like tai-chi, qi-gong, etc. are good things. I've known a bunch of people who have used energy practices to revitalize their health after being problem weed smokers.

I'm a fan of traditional chinese dietary therapy. Basically eating fresh, cooked, whole foods. Not eating or drinking anything colder than room temperature. This helped me a lot in reducing the intense social anxiety that I developed when I was getting high.

I think you could go to a group like narcotics anonymous. I've never been there, but a friend has. She thought that a lot of folks there don't even take weed seriously though, as many are recovering from harder drugs. If you are female (I'm guessing you are), there is also a problem that a lot of guys go there to hit on chicks rather than to work the program. Hmmm. . . maybe if there was an all female group it would be worthwhile.

I don't think you necessarily have to go to a group to quit. However you approach it, I hope you are able to get free. One of things that I'm most grateful for in life is that I'm no longer addicted.

 

sea of grass and e7m8 I can relate to you guys some of the paragraphs I read I could've written myself.

I used to depend heavily on weed, wouldn't be able to study, work out or even go out with friends (and enjoy it ) if I was not high, then when I smoked I felt like this strong feeling of guilt, literally like some kind of flame was lit inside of me urging me to do everything I had been procrastinating. I never managed to do everything I wanted during one high so I would have to keep smoking through out the day. It didn't affect my academical performance, it went pretty good actually but the problem was that I felt totally dependent on weed to a point where I wouldn't be able to function without it.

here's my 2 cents anyway.
First week without is gonna be tough or even terrible depending on how much of a life you have outside of smoking weed I guess. You are just gonna have to endure that first shitty period. Once you've been sober for about two weeks the cravings should subside drastically compared to the first few days. Now here's the important part once you reach that phase you will start thinking ( at least that's how it worked for me) how after all it wasn't that hard to quit and you will be tempted to smoke again. especially knowing that you will get utterly stoned,(having been off for a couple of weeks you're tolerance will be ridiculously low compared to what it was when you smoked everyday all day). You need to absolutely NOT give in to that temptation.

After about a month you will no longer be thinking about it that much if at all. At that point it's pretty much like starting over with a clean slate. It's gonna be up to you not to get sucked into it again.

Tip: Whenever you feel really down because you are not smoking or feel the urge to go buy some remind yourself of this. There are two ways you can make this feeling of extreme unease go away. first is obvious and it's to smoke some high grade which with low tolerance will almost be like a trip. It's very tempting but you know that once you are done, and the high is gone you're back to square one. The other is waiting a bit more and the feeling of unease will fade away all by itself.

best of luck.

 

Day 20, tomorrow is day 21, or 3 weeks, of not smoking. I can't say I feel perfect, but I feel better. I've had some emotional ups and downs - I got psychologically very dependent on weed over the years to numb me, or to be my temporary crutch to not have to deal with things in any substantive way. I have since been around people smoking a few different times, and didn't even feel tempted to partake. Nobody offered because they knew I didn't want it, but had I changed my mind and asked, I'm sure nobody would've said, "no" either, so it really was up to me, and I didn't give in. I guess I really don't want it. I've had a lot of botched attempts at quitting, but I think this one is the one that's going to "stick" for me, because I just don't feel like it gives me any pleasure anymore.

What quitting has done for me is that it's brought to light some very real issues with my self esteem, feelings of insecurity, fears of abandonment and trust issues I have, anger problems, and anxiety and paranoia...these things still exist even though I'm no longer smoking, and smoking didn't help them go away either, so I'm going to start seeing a therapist soon. I'm looking for one who is familiar with working with LGBT clients - and it so happens that this place in my town which is dedicated to helping low income people with mental health issues has an LCSW who is very well versed in helping LGBT clients...I'm hoping I can get with her, as that would be a great help. It's time to finally buckle down and deal with my issues instead of just using weed as my crutch.

Kar33m, I totally get what you're saying about feeling tempted to smoke again, knowing how blasted you'll be. Here's some incentive for me, though. I just got hired at a new, kick-ass job, that does require a background and drug test. I have a clean record, but if I were to relapse I wouldn't have a clean system. The test isn't for a couple more weeks, so I'll be cleaned out by then (going to purchase a home testing kit to make sure before I go for my work's test). If I were to relapse now, I'd lose my new job, which is going to pay pretty nicely and be really cool. It's not my "dream job" but it's something much more ideal than fast food, which is what I've been doing for now to ensure that I at least have some kind of employment. That few weeks clean has been my pitfall in past quitting attempts, but now that I'm more prepared for that and this time around have a thing that would be seriously screwed up by my relapsing, it's easier not to give in to the temptation.

I will say my side effects have been mostly emotional and sleep related. I had a bit of a headache the first few days, but it passed. Anyway, gonna go now and relax, but thanks for the replies, everyone!

Ganja and me had a good run, but I'm glad I ended the relationship. It had become a destructive thing to me, and it was time to let it go.

 

nice post! i'm glad you have been able to stick to not smoking. i feel many of the same things you have said...but here i sit, hitting the bong. i'm actually in grad school for my PhD in biochemistry. i started smoking at 14. basically every day at 17, with sporadic breaks sprinkled in.

starting so young kinda allowed me to build my personality around it. now as an adult, i don't know how to get out of the habit. sounds and feels pretty lame.

maybe you have inspired me. i'm certainly not gonna flush this eighth down the toilet or anything though, hahah

it's hard for me to picture myself NEVER smoking again.
but i'd rather quit smoking than quit tripping.

 

Habits learnt young can last a life time and thats a fact of life but nothings impossible all the time you have freewill.