What would you like your wedding to be like if you were to be married? Would you like a traditional approach? Would you like it formal? For both gay grooms, both black tuxes? Or For both lesbian wives, both dresses? Would you like your entire family there? Would you have any religious rituals? Would the "throwing of the bouquet" even be there? Share your thoughts
i don't want to get married, if by marriage you mean that legal procedure. i don't think society has any business busting into an individual's life and issuing papers acknowledging two people making a life together. if you find a person you want to spend your life with, then you are the ones who make it official. you don't need a paper for it and get a bunch of people who are complete strangers to you involved in your personal life.
:iagree: I don't think I'll ever get married. I don't even think I'll ever share a house with a partner, even though what I want is a monogamic LTR. (I feel that it's mostly when people get married and/or move in together that problems and "irreconcilable differences" start arising.) Still, if ever do, I don't want to celebrate or anything. It's a waste of time and money: it's not the party that makes the marriage. It's the people involved and their love and effort that make it work and last.
I doubt that I will be getting married in the near future (which is about all the time I have left), but I am not too big on all that fuss. The marriage ceremony is medieval and I really hate to see so much money and effort go into the formality of it - when the marriage statistically has about a 5-year life span. Maybe the big weddings are the beginning of the end. I lived with three different partners (If we count Lorily that lasted half a year). Jim and I just moved in together and started sharing our lives for the next 5 years. But that was the same as heterosexual couples were doing at the time. Brenda and I moved in together for 3 years before we got married. There are some issues that run smoother with the official marriage - and yes, same gender partners are getting shafted big time by not having these legal guarantees like social security survivorship etc. Anyhow, our marriage ended up being performed by a notary public and was attended by 5 ppl. Her daughter, two of our friends from the neighborhood and two of her co-workers. We had wine and Entenmann's pastries in our apartment after the wedding. That's all anyone needs for a wedding. Shale & Brenda Wedding Portrait - March 1983 (Taken by Brenda's daughter with an Instamatic 110)
Obviously, the first thing to do is find the other fellow. My younger brother is gay, and my older brother and sisters are aware that my brother and I are gay and they are all very cool and supportive. I can't imagine a wedding without them there. My siblings all live in Canada, and same-sex weddings are legally recognised there. So we've talked about the possibility of SageDreamer getting married to another man. My little brother is single and without a boyfriend, and he asked me if I would be willing to be his best man if he were to marry another man. Of course, I said yes. I don't have a boyfriend, but I would ask my brother to be my best man in a heartbeat. My own religious beliefs are eclectic and I realize some people would disagree with me on this point, but I would want a religious ceremony. I would want something at least a little bit traditional, something that says very clearly that these two men want to share and build a life together. It's just my way of making a statement to my family and other people present that I'm serious about the guy. Black tuxes are optional. However, I would want something a bit more formal than just regular everyday street clothes. Let's face it; I haven't even picked a groom, so deciding what to wear seems a bit much. The same goes for the bouquet.
yeah i know all that and i agree completely. and I don't mean to bring up any legality stuff at all. I was just curious to what kind of ceremony y'all would have. I saw a show on Logo a while ago that showed two gay people get married. There was a couple that married in kilts! then there were more normal ones, some liberal ones, one on a yacht, etc. as for me, if i were to get married (which is if i found THE right person), i would want a very small ceremony at a very small venue place. only invite the people i am the closest with. and absolutely no religious traditions
not too big on ceremonies. if my partner wanted it i'd go through with it. and whatever he wanted would be fine by me.
THATS EXACTLY WHAT I THINK!!!!!!!!!! I'm not gay, I just happened across this thread but seriously, ur totally right!!!!!!!
im pretty young and all but i still keep the fantasy in my head. i want to have a big wedding, nothing that will break the bank but i want it to be a celebration, i would have all of my family there and hopefully all of his. mm definitely tux's because they are damn sexy, uhm im not too into the religous thing but i want the traditional talk and all that and the kiss... and the bouquet hehehe. yeah i want all of that, then i would go home and and play snuggle bears =D. meh i don't normally think about this too much because thats expecting a lot for something that is an unknown.
Ive been engaged to my partner for the last 4 years... And although I agree with most about the large ceremonies, I still think it would be very romantic to have a very small ceremony amongst close friends. Eventually we will do it, but I definitely don't want a big fuss about it. The papers are necesarry either. It's obviously not recognized here in the state of Florida, but I would most likely want to do it here or maybe Kentucky where it isn't recognized either. For me it's more like a statement of your love, saying I'm not afraid to show you and the world that you are who I want to spend the rest of my life with.
I love the clothing in that photo. On the topic of marriage - I don't have any real relationship experience..I'm so far removed from that realm.. but yea I'd like some kind of pagan poetry, flute playing and mead
