Need advice from Bisexuals...Long one!

Then, should you be with him?

That's terrible, that's when he should be sticking by you most.

 

Probably not Duck. But since the last cheat, he's been pretty much the man I fell in love with and love. The theres the fact that we just cant leave each other alone sexually, its very passionate. I really do not think Iwould ever find someone I am so compatible with in the bedroom. And if I did meet someone else, I really think I would keep going back to OH for that quick intense fix. And that, would be cheating...

Am I a lost cause?

 

If you are having trust issues there are only a few things you can do:
1 - stop caring
2 - find someone worth trusting
3 - go into denial (which you seem a little too smart to do)

And the thing about being lost, is you never know when you'll find the right way

 

Yeah, I've read enough now

A couple points that have been missed so far:

1. You are a girl, you dont know what its like having a penis, to be obsessed with that penis. Whether its anything from sneaking a look in the urinal next to you to see if he's bigger to actually sucking a another guys dick. Sometimes that obsession overflows to other guys dicks, and they dont really see it as gay, even though the act itself is classified as gay, the intent isnt, if he's sucking another guys dick but at the same time thinking in his head "man, imagine all the quality pussy this dick has had" or "Wow, I get so turned on thinking how this dick would look like pounding my wifes vag" etc etc

Theres not really an equivalent for the girls, but you girls do tend to rank other girls more on their boobs than the guys actually do

2. The Submissive / Humiliation thing is the same kind of thing as the Big CEO that orders everyone about all the time, then spends sat afternoon with Mistress Vanessa getting spanked, clothes pegs to the nipples, being told what kind of a loser he is. Its about guilt and a release from your role. In your hubbys case being nailed by another guy, also in his head, not about gay, not about attraction to guys. Its really a release from being the dominant one in I suspect all those decades previously


My kind is very familiar with those two types. Its gay when they can look you in the eye, nibble on all your muscles, give you a big passionate kiss as they blow on your chest, spoon afterwards - not all this stuff your hubby is on about

I think Duck was right,maybe you do really need to wakeup to yourself, especially if the two of you are still hot and heavy in the bedroom

Is this guy going to dump you for another guy? - Noooooo

You've still got it better than most wives, you arent talking about a hubby thats cheating on you with other girls, you're not even talking about a guy who's cheating on you with other guys, only specific acts. And you arent the couple that turns into brother and sister cos the heats died

If everything else is perfect, love, companionship, perhaps a great father, security, intimacy for ever and ever, you going to throw that away just cos he feels like sucking another guys dick once in a blue moon?

Finally, none of this has anything to do with whats really going on, if you are still psycho territorial about your guy, points to you wanting a third. So what is it, two boys, and you want a girl so you have someone to take you shopping in 20 years, or a boy and a girl, and you want another girl so the current girl doesnt get picked on as much.

Or heres a tip, have another 4 girls, then a boy, you'll be pretty much guaranteed that last one ends up like me

 

^ I agree that one or two instances of cheating is a lot better than continuous cheating -- I mean, my grandpa went back to Japan every few years after the war, and it wasn't for the sushi.

But a breach of trust is a breach of trust -- and to one that's big on monogamy, or maybe witnessed parents fighting because of cheating - it's definitely not going to be as easy to write off.

I don't see how she can trust him to be careful and cautious swinging when she can't even trust him not to cheat. But then again, she could make him get tested afterwards..

There's not much place for rigidness in a relationship; and I'm not the biggest fan of sexual monogamy -- but you can't really argue against monogamy when that was the arrangement going in.

I don't see the sexual part as being the problem any more though; but her insecurity/his trustworthiness as centerpiece of the problem.

In most cases I would be trying to convince her to ease up; and since they have kids, that might be the best advice; but I really don't see how she can ease up without them clearing out their emotional issues first.


Oh yeah, and women have no clue what sexual tension, anxiety, or obsession means to a guy -- you're definitely right there.

 

I think I have come to the conclusion, after going on other forums and seeing that there are many men with these same fantasies with no desire to actually be or be attracted to the opposite sex, that OH is attracted to the act itself and at being 31 years old, a horny little fuck right now. Which i'm only going to gain from At the same time he also fessed up to liking wearing womens underwear which has already bought a new dimension to our sex life. It was a pair of thongs lastnight and was brilliant! Just cant wait to go out and go shopping for a strap on so i can tell him to suck my cock! And then he can fuck me with it, and his!

And we are going to go out and get help for the other emotional issues in our relationships. My way of thinking is because in the past our relationship was on/off, at the off moments when he was away from the family home and having to live back at the parents house this caused him much stress, and that stress had to come out in some way, what better way for it to come out the end of a blokes cock for that tension relief! I may very well be a bit touchy and sensitive when it comes to faithfulness but as long as he can assure me that it will never happen again, then it can only get better from here, in more ways than one

 

Yes, you are VERY selfish, accept him as he is-Your marriage vows mean nothing to you?:devil: How about some compassion--and till death do you part!