I was 16 when my parents gave me a purity ring (I'm a Catholic-Christian btw) and I made the promise to stay pure till marriage. Anyways I was friends with this guy and he was recently broke up with his ex gf and we became really close friends. He is a year older than me and more experienced than I am. Anyways we started talking and became really close and I really liked him and he liked me too. So anyways we talked a lot and he talked a lot about sex quite often. We never were really more than friends, because we didn't want to ruin our friendship. So anyways he convinced me there is nothing wrong with pre-martial sex I sometime after my 18th birthday I took off my purity ring and I really really wanted to have sex with him beyond words I thought about it a lot as much as he did maybe. I was convinced he was the one I was going to lose my virginity to even though part of me knew it was a bad idea. We kept talking about it, but we never really did it. I am still a virgin to this day, a tad heartbroken, and I don't wear my ring. He found someone else and he probably has/had sex with her. That left me heartbroken because all he really wanted from me was sex really. If I had sex with him I probably wouldn't feel the way I do but I would have probably regretted it too. Anyways I don't wear my ring anymore because I still keep the promise in my head, just with a modification. I am now just waiting till the right guy. If that happens when I am married great, before than I am okay with that. Anyways I am now 19 and I still think about sex maybe to much and I am still a virgin too.
You sound more like you're waiting for any (hopefully 'good enough') guy. The title also doesn't seem to agree with the post.. Oh, and at least you realized after the fact that he just wanted sex, but you probably should've suspected that a little earlier (hell, your post made it clear to me!)
Sex is one of those things that's easy to make a HUUUUGE deal out of it until you actually do it. Then afterward you're like... that's what all the fuss is about? Losing your virginity doesn't make you feel different, or more grown up, or... anything really. I was actually kind of disappointed because I thought it would be this big, life changing milestone. Maybe it's just me, but I have a feeling you'll find the idea of having sex is way over hyped, even if it is with the perfect guy, at the perfect moment, etc. I'm not saying the ACT of sex won't be good or special or fun, but you'll see how quickly the IDEA becomes just an ordinary old part of life.
Not sure you should be saving yourself in the even he might become available. Just don't make the mistake of comparing your relationships to the one you think you want, they might not be as good, or they might be better. You don't know till you try. I say this because I have an actual soul-mate - but circumstances kept us from getting together when we should have -we totally lost contact for 10 years before finding each other again. Buy then we'd both been in other relationships and both in relationships, but we both still knew these were stepping stones - if and when we can actually get together again, it is gonna be worth the wait.