Hello, Over the last couple weeks, I've started to accept that I'm gay, or queer in some way. I'm a male in my 20s. When I look at my present feelings for men, my past relationships with women, and my life experiences since childhood, it makes sense that I'm gay. But I've also had rare instances of feeling certain ways that make me wonder if I could be transgender. I'm writing to ask if anyone (gay, transgender, straight, any gender/sexuality) can relate to this. Maybe it's even a common feeling for gay men to have. I know that no one but me can decide my sexuality, but I'd appreciate any advice from someone else who has been here. Since I began to accept that I'm queer, I've remembered a certain feeling that it would feel good to have a female body. That feeling has come on very isolated occasions - just a few times, and only in recent years. To be honest, it came as I was looking at straight porn, when I identified as straight. I thought "wow, I'm envious of the women... that looks like fun." Meaning, pleasurable to have a woman's body and relate to a man sexually in those ways. It seemed like a random thought and hasn't occurred to me much. But now that I'm questioning my sexuality, I find I can summon that good feeling of having a woman's body (even to have breasts, but that still feels sexual). And when I'm in that state of mind and I look down and see that - yep, I'm a guy - I feel disappointed. In general, I've never had a problem with having a male body. I wasn't into girl clothes growing up, and women's clothing isn't particularly interesting to me now. I strongly preferred having male friends well into adolescence, perhaps even now (which I now see as an indicator of being gay). But this feeling that it would be nice to have a female body - seemingly only as a sexual feeling? - that is there. One thing I've noticed is that this "woman's body" state of mind seems to conflict with the "gay" state of mind. That is, when I see a cute guy, it feels wrong (psychically not cool) to imagine having sex with him as a woman. Can anyone relate to this or help me make sense of it? Maybe it's a little premature to be thinking about this, as I've only just begun to acknowledge my feelings for men. I'd actually like to explore that for a while and all that goes with it. But since it's pretty clear that I've been in denial about my feelings for guys for so long, I'd rather not be in denial about being transgendered for additional years if I can avoid it. Thank you for reading. Any advice would be very much appreciated.
I can't judge your feelings but by reading that if anything I'd say you just have a sexual fantasy, nothing more.
clothes are clothes.. society makes up what you wear,, Make up your own mind what you want to dress like.. THIS IS AMERICA..
I think in todays mean world,ITS BETTER TO BE GAY than a trans (If one can be that is (They have it the hardest from what i hear)) But i think people should be WHAT AND WHO THEY WANNA BE
Exactly what I first thought when I read the op's post, though I guess one can never be sure. And change can really come at any time. Vislok, I wouldn't jump into any conclusions just yet. I too have had a fantasy here and there about what it would be like to have sex with a man as a female... but I am not trans. I enjoy being a man and being with other men. Maybe you should experiment with men a bit first and see how fullfilling the whole experience is to you. In the end, just be you and do what makes you happy! And don't rush your natural progressions.
I just saw a commercial for transgender, homosexual/lesbian's last night. It was about suicide or something because they were more likely to attempt it or some shit during teenage years and more easy to suffer with depression? First commercial I ever saw but it was akward because I had just seen a cop show the one that takes place in NY with the chick dude and old guy and black rapper guy ice t i think?
Apparently, a gay teen is 4 times more likely to commit suicide, and transgender teens, 6 times more likely to commit suicide than kids who do not have to deal with these issues. The true figure is probably much higher though, as many teens struggling with sexuality/gender identity issues do not disclose how they feel to others.
Well, I think bullying is probably the number one cause of suicide for all children/teens. This obviously intensifies if you're gay or trans. If you're in one of those groups you'll be highly likely to have to endure severe bullying. And for those who still keep the truth about themselves hidden, just the fear of bullying, reaction from parents, and ostracision is enough to drive some to kill themselves. I think in at least some of the cases when a young person (or even an older person) kills themselves for no apparent reason, the underlying cause is due to distress over sexuality/gender identity issues.
Law and Order SVU, who's episodes basically always deal with child abuse, rape, or other sex crimes. Nothing was better than the episode of transgendered teenagers who went around robbing medical warehouses for hormones.
