My wife can't seem to relax her anus after having orgasm's. She is willing to give me oral or vaginal intercourse but won't do anal if she has had an orgasm. It is disappointing for me when I go down on her and watch how much she enjoys it and how hot she gets, but have to stop if we want to do anal. Obviously, I forgo anal at times to finish the pleasure she's so obviously enjoying. Problem is then she gets disappointed because she knew I was looking forward to anal. Do any of you ladies have problems doing anal after having an orgasm(s)? Do I just need to be patient and give her a "recovery" time before attempting to bust that butt? Also how many ladies will allow their significant other to have anal even if your not in the mood for sex? IOW just pleasing him with anal. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.
Your term "Bust that butt" tells me a lot about why she hesitates. Hmmmm... Try "Give her a gaper", or "Do you want me to make your a--hole the size of a hula-hoop". I'm sure she will be right into it if you just change your attitude a little bit, and her disappointment will go away.
My apologies for poor choice of words. Sometimes, that is what she desires I am very sensitive to her when it comes to anal sex and there is no hesitation on her part about anal sex. She and I really enjoy it. I was just wondering if it is normal for a woman to not want anal after an orgasm. Like I said in my original post, I enjoy pleasing her to the point of not having anal myself even if we had decided on it. But if there is something I can do to help her with our anal desires after she has cum then I would like to do it.
It's called the Refractory Period. Look it up, and you will understand better. It is different for everyone, and perhaps the hormonal let-down for your wife makes her not want sex at all after the first orgasm. That isn't uncommon, and is why it is sometimes necessary for men to have two chicks in bed at once. Don't blame yourself.
I would not have anal sex with somebody just to please them. I would need to be in the mood and feeling good to begin with because, for me, anal sex hurts for the first few minutes . Also, I need to be really relaxed during it in order for it to feel decent. Have you considered fingering her ass slowly (with some lube on your finger) while you perform oral sex on her? Maybe she could even be on her knees above you. That would likely be exciting for both of you and you would be preparing her for anal as well. Just a thought.
Try a butt plug while your going down on her. It will help her relax as you pull it out to insert your dick. Also, it will keep the anus muscles from clenching completly closed and allow room for your member
Tell her about an old girlfriend who went on to become a model before her Law career took off who was really into it. Then a few days later drop it into the conversation, "You will never guess who I bumped into today..." Then two days later turn your phone off and be three hours late home from work with your hair wet. Anal sex with your wife will almost be a non-issue for you then.
Yeah, try lube, first with one finger gently and then graduallly with a second finger - take your time and let her relax. If your cock is really thick then you may need to work her up to three fingers depending on how slim or tight she is. Simon