Not physically, very mentally though. It could almost be considered physical, because when I slow down from a euphoric stage, it's a crash in energy, but the loss of the euphoria is a very strong dysphoric feeling. That dysphoria is why I'm sharing this with you, and it is why I try harder to hold on to euphoria. I take suboxone to get high, and I don't have a tolerance that prevents that, although I have used a lot of dilaudid in the periods leading up to the suboxone use. I find the euphoria to be quite adequate, and somewhat more significant than even dilaudid. I was sick at the beginning of my most recent use of suboxone, and I used it in combination with larger but not huge doses of dextromethorphan. I found the combination to be extremely euphoric. I felt it was absolutely necessary to feel good while in class, and I have been to my first week of classes significantly altered, but able to focus quite well. Sometimes though it seems I have taken too much suboxone and begin to nod, at a point uncomfortable, especially in class, only because I feel like passing right out, and falling out of my chair. The sleepy sensations covers my whole body, and it most importantly massages my consciousness, and this is the euphoria. I sometimes drink lots of caffeine in combination with this to prevent myself from actually passing out, and it adds to the euphoria. Also I haven't ejaculated for 5 days now, and I really like seeing all the fine bitties walking around my school, it totally adds to the euphoria. I don't want to masturbate, because for one I don't think I would be able to feel my cock, and two I don't want to drain my libido, I think it is contributing to the euphoria. But every now and then, I will have one of those dysphoric crashes, I imagine because of a blip in my dopamine levels or something. It's just total blahness for a split second, that slightly carries over for a few extra moments. So I guess I'm mentally addicted to be in this constant mental vibration of contentment, and I really dig on my music and lots of the little things. It's nice. But how long can it last.....? Just sharing my past week....maybe this was better as a journal.
I am a bit similar to you. I also take Suboxone, and at a low enough dose that I still find it quite euphoric. I don't think that is a problem. I have suffered from suicidal depression coupled with psychotic manifestations in a very real sense (diagnosed from bipolar to schizophrenic), and if it takes chemicals to keep me from offing myself, then I really have no problems with it. I went a bit tangential, however. I am not implying you are mentally disturbed. However, I feel more stable than ever, and I take Suboxone, three psych meds, and weekly doses of 2C-I.
Oh I thought you said you couldn't get actual psyches. That's good you are using 2c-i, it might help out a lot. And yea suboxone makes life better, keeps my mind slightly more focused, I don't feel like I am hyper deficit, I feel like I have more energy even though I some take nods, but because I don't ache, I don't truly feel exhausted by just being awake.
Hahaha yeah, I am having trouble with agreeances between planes of subjectivity. I understand relativity but I am plagued by the surrounding ignorance of it, so close to home. And that is hilarious, it's not my parents for the first time. Sure they don't know I use painkillers, but they know I am addicted to euphoria, getting high everyday, and accept me. But this disagreeance between those by relationship in simply the understanding of varied human nature. I thinks it's a shame, and I am truly thinking about ending certain relationships because I can not bear the weight of my close ones not blood seeing me in judgement through misunderstanding. My rant.... But I totally barely missed an accident being really bad today, I got hit, but by the graceness of it we maneuvered just fast enough. It not being bad, then the fact of relief, it wasn't my careless driving but some total MILF's totally illegal passing, and there was little damage and I let it go without incident. The relief was such a euphoric rush, and she was pretty hot. I gave her some shit, but she lied to defend herself, not that it mattered so I said "Ok fine" and was just grateful as shit. I sniffed some sub and smoked a bowl of such tasty headie. Jamming out to some blues show. This one Americana blues soul young lady, Amy LaVere, I was picking my guitar too. It was so slow and groovy. I leaned up my back against my door. Damn I almost orgasmed with euphoric sexy sound. This is her, not the song, but damn just saw her for the first time but she is pretty dang cute. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UifarGFyHII"]YouTube - Amy LaVere - That Beat (Keeps Disturbing My Sleep)
that is the main reason i take opiates... i do not see any other reason for wanting to other then for actual pain. i look at things like 'who makes the standard of wrong?'
Op, in my honest opinion.... You're got the mindset to become a baaaaaaad junkie, fast. If you want out with your health, your sanity, or your money, you'd better run like hell.
lol Son I wouldn't touch a needle if my life depended on it. Haha, unless they need to do an emergency IV in a medical emergency. I don't have the money to buy enough oxy or any other opiate to snort all the time. I take suboxone because it is cheap and plentiful. It is quite easy to come off of. this week is over anyways, I busted a nut. Now I'm just normal.
Addicted to euphoria to the point of normality being dysphoric.... nah, you're not at risk. And all junkies go into it thinking "I'm gunna shoot so much dope so soon, this is going to be so cool". None of them just like occasional euphoria. Also, all junkies totally shoot, there are none who use any other way, or a combination. Also, people DON'T go to heroin to avoid oxy prices, EVER. It's simply not done.
what are you talking about kid? I sense sarcasm? You don't know me, bietch. Plus I'm a little confused because you didn't actually respond directly to anything I said. PEACE
It seems like you suggested heroin instead of suboxone because it is also cheap. I would do and have in the past preferred dope to pills, it's just a pain to get these days, I don't know any connects straight, I have to get somebody to take me to the city. Some is shit, some is godly, and I can't always get good stuff. Suboxone suffices. I take off plenty from the opies. In fact last time I did, I ached, and got burnt out way easy, but still was just euphoric itself being off em.
Also I realized I prefer happiness. And it's not normality that's dysphoric, it's a dopamine depletion thing, it's most definitely a nuero thing, I can feel the dip in my head.
old thread, valid response though; the true cause of addiction is general unhappiness with life...replies echo the findings of the study reported on by the huggington post http://www.huffingtonpost.com/johann-hari/the-real-cause-of-addicti_b_6506936.html
